QUICKIE Confessionals: Swinger Secrets, Rejections & Real Talk

0:12 All right, y'all, before we dive in, a quick heads up. This show is raw, real, and definitely not rated pg. We're talking about adult themes, sexual content, and the kind of stuff you probably don't want blasting through your speakers at work or around your kits. So grab some headphones, pour your drink of choice and get comfy. Oh. Just so we're clear, we are not licensed therapists, counselors, or sex couches. Sex coaches. Sex coaches, not sex couches. We're just a couple of people sharing our lives, experiences and sexy adventures, an ethical non-monogamy.

0:54 So with that, pull up a chair and enjoy the show. Hello and welcome to another episode of Beyond Monogamy. I'm Adam. And I'm Chris. And today, normally my beautiful wife is the one who introduces the show topic, but she has no idea what we are doing. I just barely told her. If you've been to our website, there is the Beyond Monogamy Confessional. It is 100% anonymous, 100% anonymous, and we don't even know, like we can't even see if there's an. An email attached to it or whatever. And so when we went live with this, we got a few stories, uh, that came up and I wanted to read them on the air and discuss them.

1:34 Uh, because we, we got a couple that we can, we can talk about here. And I really love it when our listeners interact and, and, and we're just gonna do this. We're just gonna do this, guys. You know what I'm saying? So let's do this. Uh, we're gonna get right into it. Like I said, for those who are just tuning in. We have on our website 100% anonymous beyond monogamy, confessional, where you can leave your stories, your questions, anything that you want to talk about lifestyle related, if you want to say anything about our podcast, whatever, it's there for you. And so here's the very first one that we got. This one says, Hey yo, let's dive in. Been debating on leaving the lifestyle community since participation has been at an all time low ever since we joined the community.

2:22 Such great people, but it's definitely a different crowd than expected. We have met plenty of great people and hope to stay friends with them and we can. Just play outside of the community like we did before. It's been hard to find couples we are both attracted to and singles are far from available. Plus, finding mutual attraction interest wise from the other couples is always lopsided. Hopefully this feeling will pass, but if not. Then it has been fun getting to experience something different for a bit. What do you think about that, honey? I think why not? I mean, you're already playing outside of the community like you've done before. And if it's hard for you to find couples that you're both attracted to, I think you're going in there with that kind of mental mentality that it's, it's gonna be hard for you.

3:10 And if you let things just happen organically, you probably wouldn't have this message. So I think you're, you're probably doing something right, you know, backing away for a little bit. I think that's a, you know, I mean, really there's, there's no wrong way to do this. Yeah. There really isn't. And, and so like I can say, oh, you're doing a good job. And I can say, mm, that's really a bad idea. Yeah. I mean, it's, it's person to person and understand that the decision that you're making, whatever the decision may be, it's, if, if you're happy with the decision, then it's the right decision. Now, I will say a couple of things just to think about in passing. I don't know how long you've been in the lifestyle. For us, we've been in for 14 years now. I will say this. The first few years, all I was trying to do was get experiences.

3:53 I wasn't really, I wasn't really searching for friendship. I wasn't really searching for connections. I was just trying to get. Experiences in. And so when I finally did get my experiences in, that's when I realized a lot of my experiences that I had would've been a lot better with people that I actually liked and connected with. Now, it took me a long time to actually find people that I could like and connect with, and I mean years, and that's for a couple of different reasons. One. I didn't know really where to find them. Uh, there was a lot of different places and frankly, I am cheap and I don't like to pay for 'em. Uh, so that was a, a difficulty for me. Where we found a great community was in Facebook communities, Facebook groups, but we also found that, uh, sdc.com has a, a great communities in, in different locales.

4:42 Um, and, and so that's always a, a great way of, of meeting people as well. I think the big thing is. Don't have expectations. Meet who you want and, and see if there's any kind of vibe. Go out on dates and, and meet up with people for dinner or for drinks or whatever, and get an idea of who they are and if it, you know, by the third conversation or by even the third date, if there's just no vibe or even before that, then say, I'm sorry, but this isn't. This isn't for us and move on to the next one. You know, you can really, I know it takes a lot, but you can really kind of make your way through it and eventually you will find people. That mesh up with you?

5:22 Yeah. Like I said, we've been in this for 14 years and it's probably been the last four that I have started finding people. Yeah. That mesh with me. Yeah. And, and a lot of it was because of me. I didn't know where to go. I didn't know where to find it. Uh, and I also didn't know how to properly socialize with these people. I didn't know how to put myself out there. Yeah. I didn't know that I had to be 100% open about what I wanted and what our dynamic was. There's just a lot of moving parts to it, and it looks like they, it, I'm assuming they play together because they said they're, they said that they've had couples that it's hard to find couples in the lifestyle and singles are far from Yeah. Available. Yeah.

6:03 So it looks like you already have your little group there that they played with people before. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, so I, I mean, I would assume that, that maybe they've had one or two mm-hmm. That have gone well. It really depends on, on what you're looking for. I used to always want a big circle. I always wanted to have a big circle of people. I always wanted to have a lot of friends and stuff like that. Mm-hmm. Now I don't, I don't want a big circle. Yeah. I want a small circle. And so I have learned to kind of wean away some that I don't feel are fully there for, for me or for us. Maybe they're half-hearted, maybe they're just not real connections. Yeah. And, and I've tried to kind of wean away from that.

6:43 You know, you look for red flags and you just kind of go, okay. That's not from me. I'm good. And so, yeah. You know, that's, that's really, that's really the tough part with that. Now, I do have a friend of mine, my buddy, who says, I'm struggling on saying no to people. So how is, how is your take now? I, I've, I've heard you answer this before. I'd really love for you to. Give your thoughts on this when it comes to saying no to other people in the lifestyle who are interested in you. I, I'm not going to lie to you. I get that almost every day. Yeah. I get somebody who, um, is very interested but is not, I'm not interested in them and I just, I tell them, I said, it's very flattering.

7:27 I really appreciate it. Thank you for reaching out, but I am just looking for friends right now. Yeah. You know, we're all adults, and I understand you the fear of rejection because I actually have the fear of rejection when it comes to women. I do not have that fear of rejection when it comes to men. So when it comes to women, not every woman is going to like me. And so that's where. That comes in for me. Yeah. But I think if you're just very honest, honest and upfront, don't ghost. Because we did that in the past. We were those notorious people. Do not ghost people. I am very upfront. If Adam's like, no, I'm not feeling it. I'll be the one to go tell them.

8:09 We're just not feeling it. There's no vibe. Yeah. And that's a rarity though. It's usually you're the one that's not failing it. Yeah. Yeah. There's been times where you No, I said usually, yeah, usually you are the one that's not failing. Yes. Yeah. So yeah, there's been a time or two, but for the most part, when it's come between us two, you are the more selective person I, and so oftentimes we are put in this situation where as a couple, we're talking to another couple. And I'm vibing with them. But you're not because it has to be. And so in, in a situation like that, and it has to be vibe and attraction, I have to be attracted to you. Like it can't just be your intelligent, like I, there's gonna have to be aspects of that attraction.

8:52 So that's why the super selectiveness because it has to, you have to have both. Yeah, I, I mean you have to have both. See, here's something that, that Chris has realized is that you can be a friend to somebody and not have to have sex with them. I just realized that you realized that recently. Maybe. Yeah, maybe. I thought I've always known that. No, no, no. We've had that conversation probably about a year and a half ago. Yeah. Yeah, I guess so. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah. So for the longest time you didn't, if somebody was attracted to you, you would. And you were not attracted to them. You wouldn't even consider them a, as a friend.

9:33 Like you wouldn't want to hang out with them because you knew that they wanted to have sex with you and you didn't wanna lead them all. And it, it gets very pushy. Um, and now it does not get like that. Now I can tell my friends. Yeah, no, we're just friends. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And you know, when you become friends with somebody, you get to know them a little bit better actually. You get to know them a lot better and sometimes. It changes. It changes their attraction. The dynamic. Yeah. It changes their is yeah, you're right. Is pretty cool. Yeah. So, you know, for me, I, you know, talking to, to my buddy who had that, that question, I've had that before. I'm not good at saying no, no, I am not good at saying no. Frankly, it's, I don't like to hurt feelings.

10:13 Um, I don't like to. Come off, uh, rude, but at the same time, I'm not doing them a good service by not being full, uh, openly, upfront with how I'm feeling about that. And yeah, and I think women, when you're not, when you are not upfront about it. Um, I think women take the cue of that you are interested even when you're not interested because you still, it can be misconstrued because you still are their friends and you're still very charming and you still give off the flirty vibes. And so I don't think they understand sometimes that, that back and forth. Yeah. Well, you know, I'm. When I'm friends with, with both women and men, I, I try to act the same with both of them, but I am, I am overly friendly with both men and women, and women can misconstrue that as, as flirty or, or leading on.

11:09 So, yeah, I, I, I really do think that it is important to be upfront and honest. If you are not interested, I think that it needs to be said, but I am also a big believer in I could be not interested in the beginning and I can be your friend, and that can change. And so that's, that's always a tough one. I think it's, it's good to be fully honest with your feelings and if you say, well, I'm not. I'm not fully feeling this vibe between us, so it would be a no right now, but I would like to continue being your friend so I can get to know you better and that could change. Mm-hmm. You know? And if you can say something like that, I think that it would be accepted pretty well. I think it might go over.

11:50 Well, for most, most people I know. If somebody told me that, I'd be like, okay, I can, I can adhere to that. I get that. You know, the big thing that I've always struggled with is when us as a couple, we meet another couple and I'm vibing with them, but you are not, or you are vibing with them and, but I'm not, and so it's one of us that it's a no and it's one of us that it's a yes. When it's something like that. Obviously if one of us is a no, then it's gonna be a no for the couple. Right now we do, depending on the person, we do play separately now, so there are times where Chris. Is not interested, but she's like, Hey, if you're interested and you want to, you wanna have fun with 'em, by all means, go ahead.

12:32 Mm-hmm. But previous to that, if your partner says no, then it's a no whether you want to or not. Yeah. I mean, it's just simple as that. You know? I mean, if, if, if you want play with somebody and your partner doesn't, then you can either tell your partner, Hey, I really do want to, is there any way that. That I can, I can do this. Or you can just say, yeah, no, it's not gonna, the vibe's not 100% there. So, yeah. Yeah. You know, that's just one of those things that it's, it's the heavy part of this and it can apply to Vanilla World as well for people who are just dating because there's a lot of people who don't know how to say no. And I know when we were poly and I was going through these different dating apps and stuff like that, I was trying to hit up all, all these different connections.

13:14 And I remember some people telling me no in a horribly rude way, and just really ugly about it. And I remember thinking, wow, that just really wasn't necessary. And I think that really made me skittish on telling people no. Mm-hmm. Because I remember how I felt, but. Honestly, honesty is everything. Yeah. And even if it's sour at the beginning, they'll, they'll appreciate the honesty in the long run. Mm-hmm. So that, that really takes care of that. Now going into this second one here, there's a, a second confession that came in. I'm gonna read it to you here I am exploring more of what I need, and in parentheses it says I need to explore more of the BDSM lifestyle.

13:58 And my husband is helping me through the process. I finally found one guy that is very knowledgeable and experienced in the areas of what I am looking for, and I like his vibe so much that I approve and requested my husband to approve him as a play partner for me. My husband agreed, and now the guy said he's no longer playing. He hung up his tools, which doesn't make sense because a few days before he agreed to be my play partner until he moves away. I am deeply heartbroken over this because it is so hard for me to vibe and approach anyone, and the one time I do, I get rejected and it hurts so much. My fear of rejection is the reason I let my husband take the lead in all things swinging.

14:40 Yes, I have been offered to have a scene with others, but I can't seem to be comfortable with anyone except this one guy. What do you think about that? That is a very D one. That's a different one. I mean, and there's, there's a few different spots that catch my attention. One, the BDSM lifestyle is, is, is a very, I don't wanna say it's a very different lifestyle, but there are certain things in the BDSM lifestyle, like obviously trust is big for any play partner, but in the BDSM lifestyle trust is everything because you are most likely gonna be in a vulnerable position if, if you've seen any scenes. Play out in the BDSM world, anybody.

15:20 It takes a lot of vulnerability. You really have to trust the person who's in control of all of that. So I wouldn't think it's that easy to find somebody that you really vibe, that you really mesh with, that you really trust. To be vulnerable with. Yeah. And we've had that talk before because Yes. Uh, you know, I'm interested in trying things that I've never done before, and that includes the BDSM lifestyle. I don't know, like a lot of it really revolves around trust issues for me, because I don't want to be blindfolded if you're not there to make sure that I'm safe. You know, I, I don't want somebody at the helm with me tied up. No, like if I'm tied up, you know, and you're not there, like that's, there's just a lot to unpackage there and uh, you know that, so that right there is the big one for me.

16:07 So finding that you feel is very knowledgeable and experienced in those areas and liking the vibe and feeling great about it. Yeah, that is everything. But then once you feel safe with this person, for them to. Just outta nowhere. Say, yeah. Sorry. I'm not gonna, I I I'm not doing this. Yeah. I mean, there's probably more to that on their end, but I'm so sorry. Like, I'm sorry that you had to do that. 'cause that sucks. Well, see, and that's the thing is with the communication, I mean, I, I don't know exactly what was communicated.

16:47 Mm-hmm. I don't know if it was. If it was simply that, or if there was more to it than that, but I, I would've hoped that if he wasn't going to play anymore and he hung up his tools, like he said, he's, that he would give a proper explanation as to why, you know it. To flip flop back and forth and say, yes, I'm all about this. And then to immediately go the other way, as soon as you say, let's do this. Yeah. Uh, is, is kind of a red flag. Uh, and, and so with that, you really kind of have to ask yourself, okay, what was the situation here? Mm-hmm. What, what just happened exactly. Um, I, I don't really. Quite understand that. And so either he was not on the up and up and it was a situation and, and maybe it was just, or, or you know, there could be a number of of things that could have come up that were unethical.

17:35 But there could have been a number of things that could have come up that were ethical. And the problem is, is that it needs to be communicated 100%. Mm-hmm. Without that, I mean, you're left sitting there going, what the hell? And you feel that rejection. Yeah. And rejection sucks. Yes. And you know, it's funny is that you were just saying how. You're afraid of rejection for women, but you're not afraid of rejection for men? No. Why is that? Because they're easy to get because men are easy to get. Yeah. Yeah. That's so funny. Yeah, because someone, so someone just messaged me on another note. Someone just messaged me and said, it is so hard for me to find, and I don't know if this person listens to work our show or not, but they said, it is so hard for me to find a partner to somebody to come over when I need it.

18:20 And she was like, why? I don't know why it's so hard. And I was like, yeah, it's, if you're being selective, it's not hard If you're being selective. It's not hard to find somebody if, I'm sorry. If you're not being selective. It's not hard if you're being selective. It's very hard. Yeah. Yeah. And there's, there's any number of reasons why, I mean, it can come down from physical to, to personal. Yeah. And, and, and how they act. Yeah. But yeah, no, men are, um. Are men are easy than women, they're easier than women for me as far as, um. And I'm not saying, oh, I'm so hot. I just have, I have a lot of guy friends that if I need somebody I can reach out to. What's funny was, I remember for the several years when we were in the lifestyle, you know, and, and I'm sure that there are a lot of couples that can relate to this.

19:06 Sometimes you have these moments where it's just like. I need somebody over right now. You need to invite somebody over right now. Like it could be a, a Friday night. You got the house by yourself and it's the two of y'all and y'all are getting it on and y'all are talking dirty. And it's like, you know, we could, we could invite somebody over. And it's like, yes, get somebody over right now. And of course, it's those times that you can't find anybody, you know? Yeah. Nobody's available at all. And then of course, you know, you, you get off and then it's like, yeah, no, I, I don't want anybody to come over at all. What were we talking about? Because there's, there's something our typical weekend. Yeah. 'cause there's something cold, horny brain. It's a thing. Yeah. You know, it gets you all gray and, and, and, and muddled up and you're not thinking.

19:47 Right. Because you are in horny brain. Yeah. You know? And it's like, oh yeah, bring, get them over here. Get them over here right now. That is very true. I, I, this, this past weekend we attended a hotel takeover. We did. And we were in this hotel from Friday afternoon till Sunday morning. Yes. And I'm talking, this is a hotel of fully naked people. Everybody's in lingerie. Everybody is feeling the vibe. Everybody's got their own hotel rooms. Like you can, if you wanted to, you could go from room to room to room to room and just play, you know what I'm saying? Like we had. Several opportunities. Yes. From Friday to Sunday to play with a numerous amount of people.

20:30 Yeah. And with that we did not, no, we did not play with a single person. Now that that wasn't by choice, I guess it was kind of by choice. We had to do a live show on Saturday and so we were there Friday. Mm-hmm. And. Friday night, all I kept thinking about was the show and how we were gonna put it together. This was our first live show, all this stuff. And so I couldn't stop thinking about that stuff. And so it was really hard to mesh into the vibe of the party. Okay. So eventually we went up to the room probably about 10 30. Mm-hmm. And amazingly enough, we crashed out. And we crashed out very quickly.

21:10 You know, we're very busy people. Yeah. Yeah. And so it's just hard for us. Like we, when we have alone time, it's just for us to just relax and, you know, we've been doing a lot of traveling and honestly, we had the hotel room and it was like, oh my gosh, everybody was downstairs. We were on the third floor and we were enjoying some quiet time and we slept great. So, and, and that was, uh, another reason was I didn't wanna stay up late. Because I wanted to be prepared for the show, which was on Saturday around noon. Yeah. So we, we don't, so we get up. Mm-hmm. And we do our regular Saturday routine. We go get coffee. We go get breakfast, and I start preparing for the show. Mm-hmm. And I start setting up everything.

21:51 Now, unfortunately, that show is going to air on Sunday and. There was technical difficulties and we only got video. We did not get audio. Yeah. So that sh that show is now not going to be airing. And it was only for the people that were there in the, in the room, which was fun, which was great. We had a great turnout. We had a wonderful turnout. Uh, and, and the people in that room got to enjoy a live show that unfortunately nobody else will be able to to hear. But here's the other part. So I was looking forward to getting the show done so that I can kind of take off my pants, so to speak and enjoy. The takeover, but I was so exhausted from dealing with the podcast and doing everything that we had to do for this live show.

22:33 I was, I was just, I was worn out. And I'm pretty sure you were too. Yeah. I mean, we were there. We did go downstairs for a while. Yeah. Yeah. We were part of the, the, the areas and Yeah. You know, we had talked, we had talked, we had talked several times while we were having sex in our room. Yes. About, oh, so and so wants to join us and there's this and there's that. And oh, well we gotta do is call him. But you know, that's horny brain talking. Yeah. Horny brain was talking. And then once horny brain ejected. Huh. Yeah, that was it. That was it. That was it. And we were like, I just wanna go to sleep now. I'm done. Nice. Yeah, it was nice. It was. It was actually some much needed time to ourselves.

23:15 But you know, when it comes to stuff like that, people feel like if you go to a house party, if you go to a hotel takeover, stuff like that, that you feel like you are obliged to. Play with others. Yeah, some people do. Some people feel that. Yeah. And you don't have to. No. And that's something that a lot of people have to realize. Yeah. You don't have to do anything. Nope. If you want to come in and you wanna just watch people, that is totally fine. That's okay. If you want to just be there for the ambiance, that's cool. That's what's great about this community, is you don't have to do anything that you don't want to do. If, if horny brain ejects and you're like, nah, no, I'm gonna, I'm gonna go to bed. Well, okay, that doesn't make you any less a member of this community.

23:57 You know what I'm saying? And that I think is, is a, is a big thing for a lot of people that they just feel obliged. They feel like they have to Yeah. And have to, it's you don't have to, you really don't have to. No. Um, so yeah, I, I, I'm, I'm glad that, that we got to discuss, uh, these, these confessions that came in this. So one just came in, is this one, this is one that just came in, apparently. Okay, because I was like looking at it and I was like, wait a second, I wasn't there. So I'm gonna read this for you because it just came in. We met up with a lovely, attractive couple the first year into our journey, into the lifestyle. Hi. The female met up with the other wife first for a casual lunch on a Friday afternoon.

24:39 We really connected to the point that she told me their real names and showed me her art on Facebook. We agreed to introduce the men at an LS meet and greet that night, which went well. All four of us got together for lunch the next day. We were stunned when we realized We had sat there talking for three hours. It was obvious. We all had connections, so our next meeting was. A play date that also went well. Our next get together was another friend date between myself and the wife. I really felt like I had made a new friend during this lunch date. She commented on how much she loved my leggings. I had an extra pair, so I thought to send them to her. We didn't live in the same town. I looked at their address as the wife had given me their real names, but then I thought I'd better ask first as I didn't want to come off creepy.

25:26 I was chatting privately with her hubby that night, and I mentioned wanting to send the wife the leggings. That's when I got put in my place. He said, we don't mix our vanilla life and our lifestyle life. Wow. Okay. Then I felt like I'm good enough to fuck because of the way we met. That's it. I wasn't proposing a family barbecue. I just wanted to surprise her with a $10 pair of fun leggings. I wanted to tell him, dude, I already have your address. If I was going to to out you, I could. But I said nothing despite him pursuing me. We never played. My point is this, some people are looking for friends to integrate into their vanilla life and others.

26:10 Never want the two to meet. Mm-hmm. This is something to know before diving in. I think that this was a, an excellent story, an excellent submission. Scroll down, uh, because, uh, that's, that's really, uh, oh yeah. No, that's, um, that's a really a, that's just a great point. That's a great point. And I get it. I get where he was coming from. You are right. Like, dude, come on now. It's an overreaction, it's an over, I mean, I think that's an overreaction and I would've never played with him again. So it's a strong overreaction and and frankly, uh, that kind of reaction would turn me off immediately.

26:50 Oh yeah. And I would be like, okay, dude, no sex for you. Yeah. You know what I mean? And because like, what are you mixing? Your vanilla, the mail. The mail. Is someone gonna know? Like, yeah. Like, like I, I don't see how that would be. Mixing vanilla and, and lifestyle. Yeah, that's silly. And so, like I said, that reaction from him just feels overdone. Not to say that he's wrong, I mean, maybe that's their thing. Um, and maybe something has happened to them that that's their thing now. But yeah, I mean there, there, there's a lot of people and, and it's a great point to make. And the fact that there are a lot of people who are. Very discreet. Yes, of course. If you spent time with the wife and y'all really got close to each other, if they were that discreet, I would figure that would've been mentioned by her.

27:34 It should have been. Yeah. Now one, one thing, and I would've really gone to the wife and been like, Hey, well yeah, but she was trying to Well, I'm, yeah, yeah, that's true. If you say, well, I have a surprise for you, but I don't wanna tell you what it is. Can I send this to you? Yeah. Uh, that would've been better and she probably would've been a little bit nicer about it. Yeah. That's awesome. That's awesome. You know, I, I, I think that's, this, this is a really good point, and I'm really, really glad that my, my buddy hippie chick went ahead and, and submitted that because it's, it, it is really, really a great point. Yeah. Um, because there are a lot of people in this lifestyle that they don't. They don't mix the two and they really try and keep them separate. There are a lot of people in the lifestyle who don't even consider themselves lifestylers.

28:17 Wait. There's even people in the lifestyle that don't even, like, they will not play or talk to anybody in their hometown. Oh yeah. We know some of them, so Yeah, totally get it. You know? So everybody's on their own discretionary level. Was this an overreaction totes? Absolutely. Overreaction. But for him, he probably didn't think so. But realistically, we all have to consider that whenever we talk to other people. That's reactive right there. The way he reacted was reactive. It was immediate. It was kind of rough and, and, and unnecessary. I think that if he wanted to, he could have explained his situation a little bit better, where it didn't have to be a reaction like that.

28:59 And so there's just so many things that play on that one. I, I, I, I appreciate that, that, that, that quip that story because I, I think. There's a lot to be had from that one. Yeah, for sure. Um, so with that, that takes care of our confessionals. Just a reminder to you guys out there, we have the confessional, we, we have this ability that you can give us. Now, I, I, I said who that last one was because, uh, that's a friend of mine who she outed herself on, on, on my social media that that was her story. But like I said, I, I don't know. Neither one of us know the stories, who they belong to, that sort of thing. We love the fact that people feel that this is a safe space, that they can give us our, uh, our interactions and those stories.

29:42 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. We love that. And so if you want to take part in that, if you want to talk to us and not be named, but you want to tell us everything that you can, you can do so at our website and we'll give that to you in just a minute. But with that, we're gonna go ahead and wrap up. We're gonna say, thanks for hanging with us. For this week's quickie. Yes. Thank you all about the confessionals. If you loved it, make sure to like, subscribe and share and leave us a review because it seriously helps us grow and it keeps the conversation going. And you can find everything beyond monogamy@www.beyondmonogamy.com, including our Beyond Monogamy Confessional that he has mentioned, and all our blog posts, merch, and all the juicy extras.

30:23 Absolutely. And don't forget to check out our events tab on that same website for details on the upcoming Beyond Monogamy events like the upcoming Beyond Monogamy Meet and greet at Club Eden San Antonio this Saturday, December 13th at 9:00 PM. Uh, for those of you who would like to hang out with us and you're in the San Antonio area, are you planning on being in the San Antonio area? Come on down and see us. We're gonna be there. We're gonna have accounts, we're gonna be hanging out with a lot of people. Shout out to our friends, Nicole and Isaac with the Pineapple House, Texas from Houston. We did a show with them and they are actually going to be out there with us, celebrating with us, and we have several other people coming.

31:04 We're actually gonna be up. Shooting a show out there before the club opens. Yes. Uh, so that's gonna be a lot of fun. Uh, so if you can make it, make it because we're gonna be there, be there. Be Square. That's right. We're also streaming every Thursday on full swap radio.com at 2:00 PM and 7:00 PM Central. So tune in and show us some love there. And if you wanna help us grow this community, join our Patreon at. patreon.com/beyond monogamy with Adam PRIs. That's where you'll get all the early access behind the scene moments and after hours content. All right, so guys, we got a gift from the Happy Swinger and I'm going to show everything that we, I'm not gonna be able to show everything that we got, but this lamp right here, they made this.

31:49 And they customized it to the colors that we wanted, so it was a surprise for my boo bear. Very cool. It has an orange little top and the blue. It's blue down here, and it has a light in there, but they also made us a dors. That we forgot to use at the takeover, and they also make like key chains and stuff like that. But, uh, we're gonna share all their information on our links and I'll also share it on all of our social medias. But if you want to order one of these guys, let me tell you, it is so worth it. Yeah. You know the happy swinger on TikTok? Yes. Uh, that's where we linked up with them. The Happy Swinger. They're, they do amazing work. I follow them as well, and I've seen a lot of their work. I am thrilled that we were able to get the stuff that we get right.

32:30 They sent us a whole package of really cool stuff, A whole package they, they sent That's gonna sound funny. A dick whistle. Yes, they did. It's a penis whistle and uh, I. That was, that was hilarious. Uh, but there was a lot of different things that they sent us that they, they ma they create Yeah. Themselves. And, uh, you know, we, we definitely wanted to give them a shout out because they do incredible work. I mean, like, this is incredible. This is incredible. Like the detail on this thing is amazing, guys. Yeah. Like, yeah. Absolutely. So to our friends, the happy swingers. We want to say thank you. Thank you. I want to say thank you because I know my love is the one that that was setting this up.

33:11 I personally would like to say thank you to you guys. We really appreciate all the love and support just on the podcast end of it. I know that you guys share a lot of our clips and things like that, but also for this, this, I mean, I love this. Mm-hmm. I think this is a great addition to our set, so thank you. To the Happy Swinger and I, I'm just gonna throw this out there for everybody who's in this lifestyle world. If you create, if you make things that are specific to this lifestyle, I want you to contact us and if you can send what you can and we will focus it. On the show, we'll have it on the show. We, we love to show off what our community members can do because we believe in this community, we love this community.

33:56 Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And we love to share everything that we can with everybody. So shout out to the happy swinger. Thank you so much for that. We appreciate you that. Thank you for listening and we will see you guys next week. Bye.