To Wax or Not to Wax: Bush, Bald & Body Talk in ENM

0:07 All right, y'all. Before we dive in, a quick heads-up This show is raw, real, and definitely not rated PG We're talking about adult themes, sexual content, and the kinda stuff you probably don't want blasting through your speakers at work or around your kids So grab some headphones, pour your drink of choice, and get comfy Oh, and just so we're clear, we are not licensed therapists, counselors, or sex couches. Sex coaches. Sex coaches. Not sex couches We're just a couple of people sharing our lives, experiences, and sexy adventures in ethical non-monogamy. So with that, pull up a chair and enjoy the show Hello, and welcome to another episode of Beyond Monogamy.

0:53 I'm Adam. And I'm Pris, and on today's Wednesday quickie, I wanted to talk about do you like it bald or with a little fuzz? Talking about my head? Yes. The bald truth. Oh, no. We did not bring that up- Oh … during, during Pris unfiltered Wednesdays. No, hombre. I don't think so.. Okay, so you know, te gusta pelon? Or te gusta con pa- you know, poquito, poquito cabellito? Yeah, yeah. How do you like it? Do, do you like a little cilantro on your taco? That's right. Okay. So, um, and I'm saying this because I mean, we were gonna go a different way with this, with this right here, but I… This has actually been on my mind.

1:38 It's actually something that I've thought about because, um- You talking hair in the nether regions? Yes, because let me tell you, I know we… I should've gotten lasered years ago when my ex was being lasered, when he lasered his whole body. I should've done mine. Lasered his whole body. His whole body. Wow. He likes it smooth. Well, I think he's gay, so. I mean, one doesn't correlate to the other, but yeah. No, um, but I think he's gay, and he was very insecure about that, and I think that- About the hair? Yeah, and so I think that's why, because he wanted to be more, um, smooth skin, more feminine. Oh, hmm. And so, um, so yeah. But anyway, um, I'm 48. You are. You are, yeah. I get waxed. That's true. Um, I get a sugar wax.

2:19 I do not do hard wax, um, because of ingrowns, and my skin is very sensitive. So I do sugar wax, um, and I do that what maybe every four to six weeks. Ish, yeah. Pretty much. And sometimes homegirl can't afford $65 or maybe just don't have time to go and see her favorite wax, wax experiment person. Or no, wait, wax-itionist? Aesthetician, bitch. Waxologist? It's an aesthetician- Is it an aesthetician? … to go see my favorite aesthetician- Aesthetician … um, at Rewaxation here in Austin, Texas. Shout out. She is my favorite, favorite, favorite person. Um, and she only works on weekends, and sometimes I'm super busy.

2:59 Hmm. And so anyway, I wanted to stop. I wanted to stop. You wanted to stop? Cold turkey, huh? I wanna, I wanna stop cold turkey. But let me tell you. Stop, stop my wax cold turkey. I wanna stop- cold turkey because I'm kind of tired of it. Like, I'll shave my legs for me. I shave my underarms for me, and I'm not very hairy. No. Um- Very scary, hairy Kerry. No, you are not. Because I've gotten waxed so much, I'm very sporadic. Like, I have a little patch. But other than that- Hopefully not sporadically. Yes. Yeah. Um, so I don't, I don't know, right?

3:40 But the other night, I don't know if you remember, we were laying in bed and I was kind of, like, setting up, like, my OnlyFans and all that for the week, and I was talking to you about something and I said, "I think I'm gonna make a new page and it's gonna be called The Bushy Babe." Oh, yeah. Because I think I'm just gonna show my bush. Your bush, huh? Just period. Yeah. So I have a patch and I, I'll trim that, but I am tired of, like, waxing and having to have the, make the time to go over there. But I only do it because I have a little bit of hair between my butt cheeks. Oh. Oh, yeah? And it's not so much, like, in the- You got a Re- you got a Rapunzel ass troll hanging out, hanging out his little hair down.

4:27 Waiting for a knight to come by to crawl up. I'm sorry. That was what played in my head on that one. Sorry, guys. You guys just entered my head for a second there. Um, no. It's not… You don't have a whole lot down there. Yeah, no, I don't. Um, my question is this If you don't get it waxed- Uh-huh … that little bit of whatever that you claim is there, is it gonna grow out more? You know what they always- No … used to say as kids, you know, it's like, well, you shave. Once you start shaving- I think- … it's gonna keep coming out, you know? No. No. No? I, I think, I, I mean, maybe they'll get longer, but I co- I'll trim those. Yeah. I just am tired of going and getting waxed. So how, how are you gonna take care of, uh, what's, what's in that area?

5:08 I mean- I have a trimmer, uh, that we got from Amazon. Oh, yeah. That, that is a good, good trimmer. And it doesn't… It's like a n- a non-nick trimmer. But I think I'm gonna do that, but then I'm like, if I'm gonna do that, I might as well whatever, right? Now I do not have a period. No, that's true. I had a hysterectomy. Yeah. So, and I'm fair- I mean, I'm fairly cl- I'm clean down there. Like, I don't have Yeah … I'm fairly clean. Yeah. Only sporadically. Yeah. She's like a cat. She cleans herself every hour on the hour. You clean me. That's right. She's very clean. Um- And, uh, my teeth, not so much. So, so I don't know if I care, um, because I really truly don't.

5:53 And then I'm like, oh, God, but what if some guy, whatever. Yeah, I'm over that. I'm over that. Yeah? Yeah. I am so over that, and I have a little grays down there, too. Oh, yeah, no. Your, your vagina looks very distinguished. What I found is your vagina is doing, like, this… The, the bush has, like, a little streak of white- It does … on one side, just like your regular hair. Really? Yeah. Really? I think it might be the opposite side, though. That's interesting. You know, for Halloween, you and your vagina can both be the Bride of Frankenstein. I'm done talking now. Bride of Frankenstein and Vagina of Frankenstein. But I will say, I, I don't care about, like, pubic hair. Like, you can have it or you don't have it.

6:34 Well, so it's funny that you say that because- I don't like when you shave … So here's the thing. Here's the thing, guys. We have a lot to unpack right now. So I am a very hairy guy, very hairy, scary hairy. I am hairy. Yeah. Okay? If you can't tell from the face- He's hairy … I already have, like- He has to wear, like, two shirts- I'm not, and so on- … under his shirt to keep all his hair down. Yeah, so on, on a scale of, you know, o- o- of David Spade to Robin Williams, I'm probably closer to the Robin Williams side. Okay, not that bad. Not that bad, but I'm closer to that end- Yeah … of the spectrum. Like, I am, I, I, I'm a pretty hairy guy.

7:14 Yeah. Um, but this has never been an insecurity of mine, uh, not even as a kid growing up or anything like that, I, I never really had insecurity about my my body's hair. Uh-huh. I felt like it was a natural thing, it was what it is, whatever. Yeah. Well, your dad was hairy. Yeah. But when I got to the lifestyle- … well, that's where that changed. I was talking to somebody about this. Yeah? Yeah your friend the beard guy. Yeah. Okay. Um, because he's hairy. Yes, he is. And he was like, "I remember when we went to the beach or whatever, and someone mentioned that I was hairy, and was like, 'Ew, you're so hairy.'" And he goes, "It's a young thing." It is.

8:01 I think that's a young- Well, so that's, the, it's funny that you say that. Or ignorant. 'Cause this is what, this is what I was working towards, and I think you remember this. So early on when we first- Yeah … started in the, uh, community that we're in, I was still kind of trying to figure out my footing and my place in, in, in where I wanted to be and that sort of thing. We were in certain groups. And there was this one, group owner that I found quite attractive and, uh, you know, I thought, "I wonder if I have a shot with her." Well, then she ended up posting this, this meme, and it was basically asking everybody in the group on this post, "What do you prefer, hairy or bare?" Um, and, and I'm, and we're talking like all body hair, like completely.

8:44 And she was v- she posted on there, and she was very, very, uh, thorough about her want for lack of hair and that, uh, you know, she was kind of grossed out by men with, with, with body hair and that sort of thing. And I was like, "Ugh." And I don't know why, but man, it really stuck with me for a while. And it became an even bigger insecurity than what I had it previous to that. Yeah. Um, and then something happened. I think I saw somebody… I, I, I've, I've seen this post come up a few times over the years. And somebody said something like, "If you're really focused on this, you need to grow the fuck up."

9:25 Yeah. You need to grow up. Um, a- and I get, I get there's preferences. It's hair. Uh, there's preferences. Um, but I also understand the point of, "Hey, grow up, man." I mean- We're, are we connecting because we like each other and there's some sexual attraction? I think, yeah. Or am I worried about, uh, you know, I'm gonna have a, a, a bush hair in my mouth at some point? And I think people- Give a fuck … I think it's It's shallow It's shallow It's shallow And it's, it's probably even, like, a younger person. Possibly. I think that person was just doing it to get under your skin. Ah, I don't know. I don't, I don't think so, but- But I meant… But I mean, like, it's, it's a, it's, it is a very shallow thing. So, like, do you care? Do people really care?

10:06 I think it's really if you personally do not care, like, if you have seen me at the club or if you have seen my, my links, um- … my, the spicy ones. If there's been a chance that you've seen my bush- … either in person or online, you may be entitled to a settlement Just call the 1-800 number that should be coming up here shortly. So, I mean, with that being said, I don't care. Yeah. I don't care. Now- Me preference to my husband, I like when you don't, when you just barely trim it.

10:55 Yeah. I don't like when you get too close to the skin. Well, you know, it's- It bothers me … I get that. I, you know, so most of the time, the, the only time that I really get close to the skin is because I fucked up and I gave myself a patch by accident. Oh, I'll do it for you. You know, I, you've always said that- You know- … and I've never been comfortable with it, but I'm gonna have to give it more of a shot because- Because I know I can make it happen … it's just a matter of me laying on the, on, on the bed. Babe. It's a matter of me laying on the bed with my legs open- Yeah that, I don't know, it's just so vulnerable. Yeah. And I don't, like it's not the most comfortable position. I mean, I get it. I understand why my cat doesn't like to be on its back.

11:35 I mean, I get it. I have literally- Like, that's just a very vulnerable position … I think I've showed you my asshole, like, look at my asshole like at least- Yeah twice in my, in our marriage. Twice. Maybe more. Twice in the past year. But like, I mean, like I had hemorrhoids. I know, I know, I know parts of your asshole that are like the Mariana Trench. Like, you never knew that there was so much going on down there till you really explored it. I had a hemorrhoid last year, and- Yeah, this is the sexy part of this conversation. This is so… Like, you have a hemorrhoid, and like, I think it stays there forever. You think it stays there forever, the hemorrhoid? I don't know, like it feels like a little piece of skin.

12:18 Oh, my God. I love where this is going, yeah. So here's the thing about that, uh- Not a lot of people go back there, so. Yeah, so I don't care. Yeah. And so that's why also I don't care if I have hair. Like… You know what? Good for you. Yeah. Yeah. Empower that shit. My little friend needs some fur. Oh, my God. Yeah. Give him, give him a, give him a little forest to, to hang his tribe back at. Yeah, I get it. Anyway, I don't care. Hold on, hold on. We need to tell you guys about 3Fun first. Oh, yeah. Okay, so 3Fun is the app. You guys know the app.

12:58 And if you don't know, it's for couples and singles who wanna connect with like-minded people. And it actually works. Like, we're not just saying that. It's easy, it's low pressure, and it's way less awkward than trying to figure out on your own. Way less. We're gonna leave it at that. Yep. Download 3Fun. The link is in the show notes. Okay, where were we? Huh. Um- I get it. Um, but you know what? I, I, I totally, I think as we get older, the, the need, the feel of need to completely landscape your nether regions. Yeah. Unless you're gonna be on camera a lot- Yeah, I- I think a lot of us just go, "Eh, I'm just gonna trim it up. I'm just gonna- Right … make it look neat," you know?

13:46 Um- I like the manly men … I used to like bald. I thought bald was really sexy and really hot, and, and occasionally it, it can be. Um, but the older that I've gotten, I actually prefer- A little bit of fur a little bit of fur. Now I, I will tell you this, this thought has never crossed my mind when I've been interested in somebody. Uh, and it never crossed his mind. In the sw- in the swinging world. Never has- Yeah … this been a thought in my head. If there's somebody that I'm attracted to, I don't sit there talking to them- Yeah and go, "I wonder if she has a bush or not," because if she does, deal's over. Yeah, no, I- You know what I mean? Like- I don't… I, I mean, I, I, I'm only, uh, talking about it because of myself, right?

14:28 Yeah, yeah. I'm also talking about it because you're right, there's a lot of, of, of- content creators that are super, that are bald, you know, whatever. But I really feel like it's the person's preference. And let me tell you, when you get to this age, you're like, "I don't give a fuck." Yeah. You know, something's gonna happen. Push it to the side. Find the little man in the boat. You're good. It's hard for me to properly manscape that area, because I'm hairy all over. Yeah. And so I feel like if I clean up- … the, the area- It'll look like whitey tidies … around my pubic area- So he's like, "You could- It'll look like whitey tidies … So you, you could make like a thong. So I'll basically have, like, a penis-shaped underwear- Yeah … essentially.

15:10 Yeah. Uh, and then the rest is hair. So I don't really know how to… There's- I'm okay with- There's no YouTube that explains- Yeah … to you how it should look. And then my hair's very frizzy down there. Yeah. Like, there's some people that they have this really thick, beautiful, matte hair. It's just n- No … you can, you can comb it, you know? And then you could do some things with it, and probably put, put a little bit of gel in there, and spike it up a little bit if you want. I can't do any of that. No. Every day my balls have bedhead. Yeah. Same. And it's not- Well, you the other day, you were like- It's not good … "That's sexy." And you went in and petted me, and then you went- Oh, yeah … "You need to poof it." And I was like, "What?" Yeah. He's like, "Poof it." Yeah. And I was like, "Okay." Give it a little bit of a shelf. So I did.

15:50 Yeah. And now I do that. Yeah, that's right. I, I- Blow-dry it. Well, so there… And you know, it's no secret, I f- I follow a lot of- Mm-hmm … OnlyFan content creators, and I remember years back, one of the first ones that I had ever followed, uh, was this thick redhead girl. I mean, she was, she, she was this… I mean, she must have been a soccer player. She had thick thighs. Mm-hmm. She was thick all around. And she had this bright red hair. And, uh, she was not a natural redhead. Uh, but she was the first content creator that I saw that was sporting the bush. Mm-hmm. And it wasn't just any old bush. Like, it's almost like she put some time into coiffing this thing. Mm-hmm. Like, it came up, and all of these hairs were beautifully just kind of coiffed- Yeah … upwards, and it was just this patch.

16:35 Mm-hmm. And it, it was clean on the sides and all that. Yeah. And I was like, "Man, that, that looks really-" That's pretty. "That's pretty." Yeah. Yeah. That is, like- So that's why I'm like, "Man, do I really want… do I wanna go get waxed?" Because it's pretty. It is pretty. But then I'm like, "Mm, it's still pretty." Yeah. Well, you know, anybody who's going down there is probably just happy to, to be down there. You're welcome. That's right. Uh, so y- I think it's different for, for guys, though. I don't know you know, for guys, I think it's a little bit different. I don't know if bush is really, really something that, uh, that is a worry of a lot of guys.

17:20 I know a lot of guys that they don't really pay attention to that area, or that's all they do is they shave, like, their entire body or they wax their entire body. It's… I- I've only seen two extremes. Mm-hmm. Um, there's a few guys out there that will do basic manscaping while still being hairy like myself. Um, but for the most part, it's like one or the other. I've seen a lot of guys who, like, are just whacked out crazy- Yeah … full on, um- You know, I- … hair … yeah, I don't care, body hair. I will say, I like a good haircut. I love a good clean- Manscaped area … beard. Oh. Beard. Like- Yeah. Like a bald beard? Like, talk about, I, um… Y'all know me.

18:02 I'm a judgy bitch. It is what the fuck it is. Beards. I feel like I'm gonna… If I'm gonna talk about anything else besides a bush, it's gonna be the beards. Clean, wash your beards. Wash them, clean them, keep them nice and clean. Doesn't take very long, because that's gonna tell me right there how good that is. Hmm. The nether regions? Yeah. Like, my man smells amazing. Hmm. Like- Sure, I work at it … your face, you know, even when your daughters are giving you a little kiss good night- Oh on the cheek, right? They're like, "Dad, you smell good." Not something I'd bring up during a sex podcast.

18:47 But I… You know what I mean? Like, you smell good. You get, um, you get- Yeah … compliments all the time. Right. You know? And it's very well-maintained and cleaned, and you're not really a manscaper. No. Like, you're not really, um- No, not, uh- I forgot what that's called. Metrosexual. Metrosexual. Like, you do not care. You know? That's still used. Like, you like to look good. Yeah. You like to smell good. Yeah, yeah. So, like, if this is good, I'm gonna say that that's probably well taken care of. I mean, I'm not, I'm not a model. Yeah. I'm not out here to, uh, to be the model on some catalog for JCPenney or whatever. Um- Like me for Sears? That's right. You know? It's not for me. Yeah. Uh, I'm just… My thing is, is I was always told, "If you're gonna go into the lifestyle and you expect to get any kind of attention from women, you have to put in the same amount of maintenance to look good that you expect women to do." Yeah.

19:43 You know? There you go. Yeah. Like, take care of your face. Um, but yeah. I'm, um… Oh, going back to the, to the nether regions. Um- smell Mm-hmm Right? Like the cleanliness of it. Um, I feel like I'm, with a little patch even, I've, I've had the little patch for a few years already now Mm-hmm I can maintain that myself, right? Yeah. And of course you want to make sure that you're… I feel like I'm even making sure even more now that I'm keeping, like, more hair, how clean I am. Mm-hmm. Like, I'm constantly going, you know, to the bathroom and I'm like, "Okay, let's clean you up, little guy." For the next person.

20:29 Um, so you know, there's a lot of that. But, um, I'm a, I'm, I'm a pretty clean woman, so I think, yeah, I'm, um, I'm at that phase in my life where I'm like, "Eh, beat the bush and figure it out." Well, you know- But I like it … I, I think the, the discussion- It's sexy … the, the discussion that goes hand-in-hand with it is because we're, we're talking about the hair from that region, but- Mm-hmm one of the insecurities that I have, I know o- an insecurity that many people have, women especially, is the, the FUPA area. Yeah. Uh, you know- Yeah … w- we are not of perfect sizes, guys. No. And I think if you're in the community and you're in the lifestyle, and if you've been to any e- event- Yeah … you'll realize that there's a lot of people who have regular bodies.

21:12 And, uh, you know- Not everybody's perfectly built … yeah, so we are, we are healthy people. Um, we should work out. W- we should work out to become healthier. So there's some parts of our body that we're insecure about, and so the lower region, especially for women, it's where we carry most of our weight. It's where we lose our weight, gain our weight the most. We've had babies. So that lower region. Now, I'm not saying that it's everybody, but, um, right now there has been no working out, and I feel like that's one of my main insecurities. Well, you know, and guys have that insecurity as well. I know I have it. Yeah. Um, you know, that's an area that, uh, hey, it's not… I don't have the, the little V aiming downwards.

21:53 It's more like, uh, a happy face down there. Yeah. And, uh, you know, I am not, I'm… At least you can say, "Oh, well, I ha- I've, I've delivered, uh, two babies." Yeah. Uh, I've seen two babies delivered. And I've eaten a lot of donuts in the process. You know what I'm saying? I've worked very hard for my FUPA. It's baby fat. You have it. Uh, it's, it's not sexy in my eyes on myself. Yeah. But let me tell you something. I think it's sexy on women. Yeah, I have learned to, um, embrace, embrace it. Now, I am still planning on getting a tummy tuck at some point in my life. You know there's a lot of women who, who get- Yeah … the, uh, the body work done. And if you're doing it for yourself to make yourself feel better- Yeah … by all means, more power to you.

22:35 Yeah. But don't do it because other people think you should. Yeah, no. There's a little bit of fat pockets that I would, um, love to get rid of, and of course the extra skin is gonna be there. But, um, I have learned to embrace my FUPA. Yeah? I, I kind of, I like it now. You're no size two. No. And I, and I dig that. You know, I like that you're no skinny mini. Uh, not body shaming it by any means- Yeah … because I like all different body types, but, um, I love your curves, man. Yeah, yeah. You know? I mean, that's one of the things that I celebrate. So do I. I'm learning to embrace them even more now. Yeah? Yeah. Yeah. It fits ya. It fits ya. It's me.

23:16 Like- And you fit me- Yeah … like a puzzle. Yeah. Uh, I, yeah, I really think it's sexy. And you know, guys, uh, me specifically, just talking from my end, you know, my, my, uh, upper pubic area is, is a lot larger than I would like it to be. Mm-hmm. And I compare myself to frigging porn, dude, and I shouldn't do that. No. But it's hard whenever I look down and it's supposed to be the same shot that I see in porn where- Yeah, yeah … you know, you're kinda looking down, and it's, like, flat, and then it's dick, and then there's mouth, and all this stuff happening. Uh, I look down, and it's like, "Oh, man, that's, that's a lot of extra cushioning.

23:58 Cushion." Uh, you know, and it will put me in my head for a little while. Yeah. And I, I just needed to really sit back and go, "Okay, you know what? It's not a big deal." I… It's not. Like, I love that. Like, I love a big guy. Yeah? I love a big guy, and you are perfect. Oh, thank you. You're perfect. Aw. Aw. Heart hands. Yes. Aw. Thank you. Take them. Yeah, yeah. Oh, like- They go aw … it's, it's a heart hand. Uh, yeah, so, uh, consider this the feel-good pubic ode of love. Yes. Uh, you know- Love your body, love yourself … and we understand if you have preferences that are bald, but as some people have said on the online, grow the fuck up.

24:41 Grow the fuck up. Like- Just kidding. We mean that with love, for sure um, yeah. But, uh- So … you know- And be you. Be comfortable … be you. Be comfortable with what you are and who you are and how you are. Yeah. And, uh, you know, hey, that's a wrap on today's episode. But before we let you go, if you enjoyed this one, hit that like button. It genuinely helps more than you think. Yes. And if you haven't already, subscribe to the show so you never miss an episode. New ones drop every week, and we've got a lot more coming. Yeah, and if something we talked about today hit home for you, share it. Send it to a friend, a partner, someone in your community who needs to hear it. That honestly is how this show grows, one share at a time.

25:24 And if you got 60 seconds, leave us a five-star review wherever you're listening, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, wherever you found us. Forget we're also on YouTube, people, and it also feeds that algorithm, and it helps new listeners find the show. Yeah, for all things Beyond Monogamy, head to our website, beyond-monogamy.com. That's your hub for every past episode, audio and video, companion blogs for each one, our merch, and contact info for our guests and sponsors. It's also where you can reach us directly by mail, by voicemail, or through our Beyond Monogamy confessional. Yeah, that's our 100% anonymous line where you can speak freely, get something off your chest, ask a question, tell a story, whatever you need, and we might just talk about it live on a future episode.

26:09 We tend to. That's right, and don't forget to check the Events tab. That's where you'll find Every upcoming chance to run into Adam and Pris in person. We thank you all for joining us for another episode, and we will see you guys next week. Bye.