June 8, 2025

Navigating Friendship Boundaries in the Lifestyle

Navigating Friendship Boundaries in the Lifestyle
The player is loading ...
Navigating Friendship Boundaries in the Lifestyle
In this podcast episode, hosts Adam and Pris discuss the complexities of managing boundaries within friendships, especially in social and lifestyle settings. They explore scenarios where friends cross personal boundaries, whether due to drunken behavior or misunderstanding social cues, and how challenging it can be to address such situations without causing embarrassment. The conversation delves into the difficulties of saying no to friends versus strangers, the importance of empowerment, and the difference in handling male vs female transgressions. Adam and Pris reflect on past experiences and emphasize the necessity to speak up to prevent further boundary violations.


xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom"
xmlns:cc="http://web.resource.org/cc/"
xmlns:itunes="http://www.itunes.com/dtds/podcast-1.0.dtd"
xmlns:media="http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/"
xmlns:content="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/content/"
xmlns:podcast="https://podcastindex.org/namespace/1.0"
xmlns:googleplay="http://www.google.com/schemas/play-podcasts/1.0"
xmlns:rdf="http://www.w3.org/1999/02/22-rdf-syntax-ns#">



Beyond Monogamy with Adam & Pris
Wed, 29 Oct 2025 03:42:08 +0000
Wed, 29 Oct 2025 03:42:08 +0000
Libsyn RSSgen 1.0
https://www.beyond-monogamy.com
en-us

https://www.beyond-monogamy.com

From hotwife adventures and swinger fails to polyamorous growing pains and everything in between, no topic is too taboo and no story is off-limits. Whether you're a seasoned swinger, lifestyle-curious, or just here for the juicy stories—you're in the right bed… we mean, place.

Expect real talk, lots of laughs, and candid conversations about sex, relationships, parenting, judgment, and finding connection beyond traditional monogamy.

🛏️ New episodes drop every Sunday and Wednesday.
🎥 Now with video! Watch on YouTube or visit www.beyond-monogamy.com]]>


https://static.libsyn.com/p/assets/7/9/4/a/794a2aa243f3c6f316c3140a3186d450/BeyoMonoRevised.jpeg
Beyond Monogamy with Adam & Pris


Adam Alvarez; Pris Alvarez







true

Adam Alvarez
adamnpris@beyond-monogamy.com


From hotwife adventures and swinger fails to polyamorous growing pains and everything in between, no topic is too taboo and no story is off-limits. Whether you're a seasoned swinger, lifestyle-curious, or just here for the juicy stories—you're in the right bed… we mean, place.

Expect real talk, lots of laughs, and candid conversations about sex, relationships, parenting, judgment, and finding connection beyond traditional monogamy.

🛏️ New episodes drop every Sunday and Wednesday.
🎥 Now with video! Watch on YouTube or visit www.beyond-monogamy.com]]>


episodic







no






Transforming Love: Jessica Fern & David Cooley on Shame, Attachment & Polywise Relationships
Transforming Love: Jessica Fern & David Cooley on Shame, Attachment & Polywise Relationships
Sun, 26 Oct 2025 10:00:00 +0000


Jessica Fern & David Cooley on Attachment, Resentment & Rewriting the Rules of Non-Monogamy

Guests: Jessica Fern (author of Polysecure, Polywise, and Transforming the Shame Triangle) and David Cooley (restorative-justice facilitator, creator of Restorative Relationship Conversations).

Episode Summary 

In this heart-to-heart, Adam & Pris sit down with Jessica Fern and David Cooley to go deeper than "What is polyamory?" They unpack attachment styles, why resentment is jealousy's sneaky cousin, and how the Shame Triangle (inner persecutor, inner victim, inner rescuer) quietly shapes conflict—and how to transform it with practical tools rooted in IFS and restorative practices.

The convo hits real-life dynamics: ditching the "50/50" myth, navigating capacity and time (especially with kids), and why relationships thrive when both partners bring 100%—just not in the same way every day. Adam & Pris get candid about their own poly chapter, burnout, and finding balance, while Jessica & David share how their post-divorce collaboration became one of their healthiest partnerships.

Keywords: Jessica Fern, David Cooley, Polysecure, Polywise, Transforming the Shame Triangle, attachment theory, IFS therapy, ethical non-monogamy, open relationships, jealousy vs resentment, relationship repair, capacity, family dynamics, Beyond Monogamy podcast, Full Swap Radio.

Listen & Subscribe

Show Notes

  • Attachment & IFS: How to spot when a part (not your core self) is driving reactivity—and how to respond with needs-based clarity.
  • Jealousy vs. Resentment: Resentment is the "check-engine light" for unmet needs or long-standing imbalances—don't villainize it, learn from it.
  • The 50/50 Myth: Healthy partnerships aren't perfectly split; they're capacity-aware and transparent about changing needs over time.
  • Polyamory + Parenting: Why time/energy constraints shift when kids are young—and how integrating partners into the family system can help.
  • The Shame Triangle: Inner persecutor ➝ inner victim (shame) ➝ inner rescuer/escapers (over/under-functioning, numbing, projection) and how to break the cycle.
  • Collaboration After Divorce: Jessica & David describe dissolving romance, rebuilding trust, and co-creating work that actually deepens harmony.

Favorite Moments

"Resentment is a really important signal—like a dashboard light. There's a need underneath it asking to be seen."
"Stop chasing 50/50. Bring your 100%—and expect your partner to bring theirs—in ways that ebb and flow with real capacity."
"The Shame Triangle links that inner critic, the shame it creates, and the 'escapes' we use to avoid feeling it. Naming it is the first step to changing it."Timestamps
  • 00:01 — Meet Jessica & David; books, backgrounds, collaboration
  • 16:00 — Sacredness, conditioning & rethinking mononormative scripts
  • 18:00 — Jealousy vs. resentment; needs, signals & repair
  • 22:00 — Ditching 50/50; capacity, boundaries, expectations
  • 29:00 — Poly + parenting; integrating partners into family systems
  • 44:00 — The Shame Triangle explained (persecutor, victim, rescuer/escapers)
  • 54:00 — Why feedback can trigger shame—and how to receive it better
  • 55:00 — Book release timing & event tour details

Support the Show

Love the conversation? Join our Patreon for early access, After Hours clips, bonus minis, Discord hangs, and more. Catch us on Full Swap Radio every Thursday at 1 PM & 6 PM CST.

Follow us: Facebook @BeyondMonogamy4U • Instagram @beyond_monogamy_4u • TikTok @beyond.monogamy & @adam&beyond • YouTube @BeyondMonogamywithAdamPris

]]>


Guests: Jessica Fern (author of Polysecure, Polywise, and Transforming the Shame Triangle) and David Cooley (restorative-justice facilitator, creator of Restorative Relationship Conversations).

Episode Summary 

In this heart-to-heart, Adam & Pris sit down with Jessica Fern and David Cooley to go deeper than "What is polyamory?" They unpack attachment styles, why resentment is jealousy's sneaky cousin, and how the Shame Triangle (inner persecutor, inner victim, inner rescuer) quietly shapes conflict—and how to transform it with practical tools rooted in IFS and restorative practices.

The convo hits real-life dynamics: ditching the "50/50" myth, navigating capacity and time (especially with kids), and why relationships thrive when both partners bring 100%—just not in the same way every day. Adam & Pris get candid about their own poly chapter, burnout, and finding balance, while Jessica & David share how their post-divorce collaboration became one of their healthiest partnerships.

Keywords: Jessica Fern, David Cooley, Polysecure, Polywise, Transforming the Shame Triangle, attachment theory, IFS therapy, ethical non-monogamy, open relationships, jealousy vs resentment, relationship repair, capacity, family dynamics, Beyond Monogamy podcast, Full Swap Radio.

Listen & Subscribe Show Notes
  • Attachment & IFS: How to spot when a part (not your core self) is driving reactivity—and how to respond with needs-based clarity.
  • Jealousy vs. Resentment: Resentment is the "check-engine light" for unmet needs or long-standing imbalances—don't villainize it, learn from it.
  • The 50/50 Myth: Healthy partnerships aren't perfectly split; they're capacity-aware and transparent about changing needs over time.
  • Polyamory + Parenting: Why time/energy constraints shift when kids are young—and how integrating partners into the family system can help.
  • The Shame Triangle: Inner persecutor ➝ inner victim (shame) ➝ inner rescuer/escapers (over/under-functioning, numbing, projection) and how to break the cycle.
  • Collaboration After Divorce: Jessica & David describe dissolving romance, rebuilding trust, and co-creating work that actually deepens harmony.
Guest Links & Resources
  • JessicaFern.com — book info, events, workshops (New book Transforming the Shame Triangle releases on October 31; pre-release discount via site).
  • Polysecure, The Polysecure Workbook, Polywise — widely available wherever books are sold.
  • Upcoming signings mentioned: Asheville (Malaprops, Oct 28), Atlanta (Cherish Books, Nov 4), Bay Area events week of Dec 17 with a day-long workshop on Dec 22.
Favorite Moments "Resentment is a really important signal—like a dashboard light. There's a need underneath it asking to be seen." "Stop chasing 50/50. Bring your 100%—and expect your partner to bring theirs—in ways that ebb and flow with real capacity." "The Shame Triangle links that inner critic, the shame it creates, and the 'escapes' we use to avoid feeling it. Naming it is the first step to changing it."Timestamps
  • 00:01 — Meet Jessica & David; books, backgrounds, collaboration
  • 16:00 — Sacredness, conditioning & rethinking mononormative scripts
  • 18:00 — Jealousy vs. resentment; needs, signals & repair
  • 22:00 — Ditching 50/50; capacity, boundaries, expectations
  • 29:00 — Poly + parenting; integrating partners into family systems
  • 44:00 — The Shame Triangle explained (persecutor, victim, rescuer/escapers)
  • 54:00 — Why feedback can trigger shame—and how to receive it better
  • 55:00 — Book release timing & event tour details
Support the Show

Love the conversation? Join our Patreon for early access, After Hours clips, bonus minis, Discord hangs, and more. Catch us on Full Swap Radio every Thursday at 1 PM & 6 PM CST.

Follow us: Facebook @BeyondMonogamy4U • Instagram @beyond_monogamy_4u • TikTok @beyond.monogamy & @adam&beyond • YouTube @BeyondMonogamywithAdamPris

]]>





59:59
false


2


27




full

Adam & Pris








QUICKIE: The Great Expectations
QUICKIE: The Great Expectations
Wed, 22 Oct 2025 10:00:00 +0000


The Great Expectations

Beyond Monogamy with Adam & Pris

Episode Summary

In The Great Expectations, Adam & Pris get real about one of the trickiest parts of ethical non-monogamy: managing what you think is going to happen versus what actually happens. From club nights that don't go as planned to the pressure of "performing" in lifestyle settings, they unpack how expectations—ours, our partners', and everyone else's—shape attraction, confidence, and connection. This candid, funny, and raw conversation explores emotional intelligence, insecurity, chemistry, and the myth of having "no expectations." Spoiler: everyone has them, and that's human.

Whether you're new to swinging or deep into open relationship life, you'll leave with practical perspective: the fewer expectations you cling to, the more freedom (and fun) you'll find.

Show Notes

Topics Covered

  • The illusion of "no expectations" in the lifestyle
  • Why we still walk into clubs hoping for magic (and why it rarely plays out like a fantasy)
  • How unrealistic expectations can kill the vibe before the night even starts
  • Attraction vs. organic connection: letting chemistry lead
  • Emotional intelligence as a lifestyle superpower
  • Releasing insecurities and learning to care less (with age and experience)
  • "Podcaster expectations" vs. real-life anxiety and social energy
  • Expectations and performance pressure—why honest communication matters
  • Respect, boundaries, and the expectations partners set for each other

Featured Moments

  • Pris opens up about letting go and growing emotional maturity.
  • Adam talks about mental pressure, male performance, and speaking up instead of spiraling.
  • A funny play-by-play of how fantasy scripts fall apart in real life—and why that's okay.
  • A shared takeaway: try not to have expectations, but admit you always will—then choose flexibility over frustration.

Listen & Connect

Stream this episode on all major podcast platforms and catch us on FullSwapRadio.com every Thursday at 2 PM & 7 PM CST.

Explore everything—blogs, videos, events, and our anonymous Beyond Monogamy Confessional—at www.beyond-monogamy.com.

Support the Show & Explore the Lifestyle

Join Our Patreon

Love the raw conversations and want more? Get early access, behind-the-mic clips, uncut moments, and member-only perks by joining our Patreon. Your support keeps the mics on and the real talk flowing.
👉 Become a Patron

Find Your People

Ready to connect with like-minded folks? Use our links—your sign-ups directly support the podcast:

Click, explore, and say hi—we appreciate you using our links!

Episode SEO

Keywords: swinger podcast, non-monogamy podcast, expectations in the lifestyle, ethical non-monogamy, open relationship podcast, Beyond Monogamy, Adam and Pris, lifestyle confidence, emotional intelligence, relationship growth, swinging community.