The Evolution of Pris: How 18 Months & An Open Mind Changed Everything

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All right, y'all.

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Before we dive in, a quick heads-up

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This show is raw, real,
and definitely not rated PG

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We're talking about adult themes,
sexual content, and the kinda stuff you

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probably don't want blasting through
your speakers at work or around your kids

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So grab some headphones, pour your
drink of choice, and get comfy

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Oh, and just so we're clear,
we are not licensed therapists,

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counselors, or sex couches.

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Sex coaches.

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Sex coaches.

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Not sex couches

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We're just a couple of people sharing
our lives, experiences, and sexy

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adventures in ethical non-monogamy.

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So with that, pull up a
chair and enjoy the show

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Hello and welcome to another
episode of Beyond Monogamy.

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I'm Adam.

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And I'm Pris.

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And today we are doing something that
we've never done before on this show.

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I'm turning the tables.

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Pris is in the hot seat today.

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Why?

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Today's episode is called
The Evolution of Pris.

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And I have receipts, let me tell you that.

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That's right.

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That's right.

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See, when we first- Babe.

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I'm just telling you.

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When we first launched Beyond Monogamy,
we recorded our very first episode

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ever, where Pris laid out exactly who
she was, what she believed, what her

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rules were, what her hard limits were,
and how she approached the lifestyle.

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And a lot has changed since then.

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It's been a year and a
half officially this month.

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Damn.

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I know.

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So today I'm gonna go back to episode
one, pulling the tape, and we are

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gonna find out just how much this
woman has grown, how much she's changed

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or completely flip-flopped on things
she said out loud into a microphone.

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Ugh, you're so mean.

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Oh, this is fun.

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You're gonna love it.

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We're gonna have a great time.

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You're gonna eat a lot of your old words.

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Before we get into it, though, if you're
brand new to Beyond Monogamy, welcome.

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We're so glad that you're here.

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Go ahead and hit that follow
or subscribe button right now

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so you never miss an episode.

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You can find us on Apple Podcast, Spotify,
YouTube, Amazon Music, iHeartRadio,

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Pandora, or at beyond-monogamy.com.

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And if you want to get to know us a little
bit better before we dive in, go back

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and listen to episode one, dropped a year
and a half ago, because today's episode

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is essentially the sequel to that one.

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All right, sweetheart, are
you ready for this one?

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I am.

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Okay.

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Yeah.

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Get ready.

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All right.

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Seat, buckle yourself in.

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All right.

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Go.

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Okay.

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So I wanna start at the very beginning.

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Who were you when we first
hit record on this show?

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Because I think a lot of our listeners
who have only known us for the

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last year or two may not realize
how different you were back then.

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So let me take you back.

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Okay.

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In episode one, you were very clear
that you got into this lifestyle

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almost entirely for one reason: women.

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Yes.

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You straight up said, "I have a guy at
home. I get dick at home all the time.

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Why do I wanna have sex with another
guy?" Mm. You were not interested in

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men in this lifestyle at all beyond me.

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Mm-mm.

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So my first question is to
you, how true is that today?

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I love, uh, I, I like men.

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Um, I'm a fan of both.

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I am definitely 100% bisexual.

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Yeah.

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Um, women are amazing.

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They're beautiful, they're sexy.

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But I no longer hate as many men.

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And how did this come about?

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Like, I mean, you were- Um- … you
were pretty militant in episode one

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-
Well

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and

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several episodes to follow.

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To be in fact, let me
tell you what happened.

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Um, we were tripping on some shrooms.

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Oh, yeah.

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And well, what had happened- What had

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happened was

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…
was, um, I had, like, this
really heavy weight on me.

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Uh-huh.

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And I think it was kinda dragging me
down and making me hate everybody.

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Really?

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Yeah.

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And so, um, the shrooms helped.

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That was, uh, an eye-opening-
Oh … experience for you.

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I know it

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was very spiritual for you.

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Guys, the shrooms, they helped.

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And let me tell you, it
was, um, it was nice.

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Yeah.

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It was really good.

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So from that experience,
what did that do exactly?

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That just kind of l- helped you let go of-

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Yeah, of that negative,
um, frame, thought of…

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Like, it even tears me up because
it's so, it was so impactful.

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No kidding.

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Yeah.

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Wow.

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Um, I was so negative because
I was like, "Man, men suck."

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Sorry, guys, a lot of y'all suck.

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Y'all do.

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Um, but I was, I was blaming the men…
You know when you're in a bad relationship

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and you're like, "Oh, I'm used to it
because all the men are like that," right?

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Yeah, yeah, yeah.

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Or you're in a bad relationship and
you're like, "Oh, I'm used to it

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because all the women are like that."

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Yeah, it's easy to hate-

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It's,

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it, yeah … hate the opposite
sex when you're in that.

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But

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you're so, you're so used to that kind of
love that you're like, "Mm, it's okay."

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Right.

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So I got to a point in my life
where I was like, "Fuck that.

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Nah.

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I, I don't, I don't need
any kind of love from a man.

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If that's the way they're gonna be-
Yeah … I don't need anything."

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Yeah.

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Um, I have one man, and
that's good enough for me.

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Yeah.

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And so we shroomed out.

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Yeah, we did.

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That was,

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that was something.

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I had these negative
feelings, kind of like…

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Just kind of went out.

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I realize I cannot wait
to be an empty nester.

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Yeah, that too.

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Um, I realize that I am living
my best life right now, and

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this is just the beginning.

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Yeah.

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Um, I learned to not be so negative,
but b- to be, still be honest.

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Like, I am straight up honest.

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Like, I, there's women and
men that I just do not like,

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and that's just the way it is.

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Um, but I'm more mature about it.

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I don't have to associate
myself with them.

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Um- And yeah, so I'm nicer.

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Yeah.

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And I've met some … Being like that
now, I have met some badass guys-

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Yeah

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…
that I find sexy.

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Um, some I haven't slept with at all.

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Mm. Mm-hmm.

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Nor have I kissed.

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Um, there's some that, um, that are gonna
always just stay friends, and that's okay.

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But they're

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excellent connections.

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They're excellent connections.

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Yeah.

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Um, and so I realized then that
I totally am, I have to have some

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kind of connection with somebody.

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Yeah.

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It can't be… God, what did the…
Somebody used a word and I was

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like, "Ooh, you used that so well."

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But she said it in our last quickie

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Superficial?

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Superficial, you know?

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Mm-hmm.

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'Cause I was very, I, you know, I was
like, "Mm, mm, I, I don't care." Yeah.

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"I don't really even have to like you
too much. I don't have to have some

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kind of connection." Um, I realize I do.

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Mm-hmm.

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And I now… Guys, I'm even, even
more open to being super honest

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with men that I don't like.

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Well, that's funny that you're, where
you're taking that turn because that

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actually leads me into my second question.

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Um- I called you out specifically
on episode one, very lovingly,

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as being transactional.

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Like you were the Terminator, you know?

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Yeah.

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You had a mission, you went in, you
got what you needed, and you were out.

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Yeah.

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So with what you're saying here,
essentially, is it fair to say you are

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no longer classified as transactional?

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I'm no longer classified as transactional.

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Wow.

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No.

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That is interesting.

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Yeah.

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I like that.

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Yeah.

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I like that.

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That's, that's cool.

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And I think because- That's
cool … I dropped that is, is why

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I'm able to make more connections.

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You know, cynicism can hold you
back sometimes, I will say that.

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It

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really can.

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It has protected us in many
situations, but it can, uh,

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can definitely hold you back.

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Now, here's the thing.

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You also came out to me as bisexual
for the very first time, before

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anyone else in your life even knew.

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Yes.

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I was the first person that you
ever told that to, and now you're

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talking about it openly on a podcast
that reaches over 70 countries.

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And hey, that is pretty- What?

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… impressive.

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That's right.

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Nice.

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Okay.

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How does that feel when
you think about it?

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I love that.

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I wish, um, I would have done it sooner.

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I hope this reaches a lot of younger
people who feel that they have

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to hide it from their parents.

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You don't.

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You don't have to hide it.

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You live your life, love yourself-

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Live your truth

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be who you are, your truth.

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Your heart's gonna follow, you know,
wherever you wanna go, and you can,

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you can hold back, but, you know,
it's… Leave yourself open to that.

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I, I should have done that years ago.

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I even tell my kids, you know,
uh, "We don't care if you're

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bisexual or gay or- Yeah,

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no,

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no … whatever.

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We don't care."

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No.

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You know?

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But that's, uh, you know, we have-
But- … expelled everybody in our

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lives that would hold them to judgment

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…
but it's so funny that they still
will hold it… They won't come out

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because they're scared- Well, they have

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to us

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…
society, you know?

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Yeah.

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Yeah, but we have some in denial
and, you know- Yeah … and

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it's like, stuff like that.

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So like-

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You know, it's still a very s-
Live your- It's a scary thing

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…
live your truth because it's, um,
it's fun and it's so fulfilling.

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Yeah, you know, I, I will say I'm, I'm
not bisexual, but I, I am very open,

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obviously, we have the podcast, very
open about our lifestyle and what we

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do and where we've been, this and that.

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Uh, and I gotta say, it is nothing freer
than being out in the open, you know?

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Yeah.

253
00:09:13,512 --> 00:09:15,551
S- nobody can use it against you if you-

254
00:09:15,711 --> 00:09:15,752
Yeah

255
00:09:15,762 --> 00:09:18,591
…
y- you use it yourself,
you know, as a badge.

256
00:09:18,931 --> 00:09:22,591
And I hope you have good support,
'cause I have amazing support, so.

257
00:09:22,771 --> 00:09:23,571
That's what it comes down to.

258
00:09:23,611 --> 00:09:26,311
Everybody's afraid of- Mm-hmm … who's
gonna support them and who's not gonna

259
00:09:26,331 --> 00:09:29,671
support them, and I think once you rip
that Band-Aid and you realize who's

260
00:09:29,691 --> 00:09:32,951
there for you and who's not, then
it just makes it easier to navigate.

261
00:09:33,671 --> 00:09:33,681
Yeah.

262
00:09:33,691 --> 00:09:33,851
All right.

263
00:09:33,931 --> 00:09:38,671
Let's talk rules and boundaries, because
in episode one, you mentioned that when we

264
00:09:38,752 --> 00:09:43,271
first started out, we had a lot of rules,
and we both laughed- Mm-hmm … about how

265
00:09:43,391 --> 00:09:45,291
silly some of them seemed looking back.

266
00:09:45,331 --> 00:09:45,571
Mm-hmm.

267
00:09:45,791 --> 00:09:45,871
Yes.

268
00:09:45,971 --> 00:09:48,871
Uh, I wanna revisit some of
the ones that actually came up.

269
00:09:48,971 --> 00:09:51,966
The first one- The no sleepover rule.

270
00:09:52,286 --> 00:09:55,446
You were very firm about that,
partially because of the kids, partially

271
00:09:55,487 --> 00:09:59,206
because of your poly experience where
the women you dated got needy fast-

272
00:09:59,406 --> 00:09:59,608
Mm-hmm

273
00:09:59,627 --> 00:10:01,026
…
and it was a hard boundary for you.

274
00:10:01,406 --> 00:10:05,066
Where does that rule stand
right now in this moment?

275
00:10:05,487 --> 00:10:08,146
Um, right now in this moment it is

276
00:10:08,646 --> 00:10:09,806
Has that changed at all?

277
00:10:10,047 --> 00:10:10,727
It has.

278
00:10:10,846 --> 00:10:10,946
Yeah?

279
00:10:11,066 --> 00:10:13,906
I'm more of a, yeah, I, I'm
open to the possibility.

280
00:10:14,226 --> 00:10:15,446
Of the, of sleeping over?

281
00:10:15,566 --> 00:10:16,027
Yeah, of

282
00:10:16,047 --> 00:10:16,106
sleeping over.

283
00:10:16,126 --> 00:10:17,026
No shit.

284
00:10:17,126 --> 00:10:17,326
Yeah.

285
00:10:18,326 --> 00:10:18,746
Wow.

286
00:10:19,307 --> 00:10:19,327
Yeah.

287
00:10:19,347 --> 00:10:20,086
Just depends.

288
00:10:20,246 --> 00:10:20,427
Wow.

289
00:10:20,706 --> 00:10:22,467
I did not- It depends … see
that one going that way.

290
00:10:23,126 --> 00:10:23,147
Yeah.

291
00:10:23,147 --> 00:10:25,926
That was a different
reaction than I expected.

292
00:10:26,387 --> 00:10:28,506
I thought for sure she was
gonna say, "No, it's still-

293
00:10:28,826 --> 00:10:28,906
No

294
00:10:28,926 --> 00:10:29,547
…
it still holds

295
00:10:29,606 --> 00:10:30,047
up."

296
00:10:30,547 --> 00:10:31,327
It's different, yeah.

297
00:10:32,027 --> 00:10:32,167
Huh.

298
00:10:32,347 --> 00:10:32,727
Yeah.

299
00:10:32,787 --> 00:10:36,087
Well, we will be talking more about
that one while we're having sex later.

300
00:10:36,247 --> 00:10:36,607
Okay.

301
00:10:37,107 --> 00:10:38,147
No, I find that interesting.

302
00:10:38,177 --> 00:10:38,187
Yeah.

303
00:10:38,207 --> 00:10:42,707
So w- when did you… Like, has this
something, has this been something

304
00:10:42,727 --> 00:10:44,407
that's popped up into your head before?

305
00:10:44,777 --> 00:10:45,077
No, you just asked me.

306
00:10:45,077 --> 00:10:45,857
Just right in this moment?

307
00:10:45,857 --> 00:10:45,867
Yeah.

308
00:10:45,867 --> 00:10:46,027
Just right in this moment.

309
00:10:46,067 --> 00:10:48,627
You're sitting back- I'm like, yeah
… and you're thinking, "Hmm, I think-"

310
00:10:48,887 --> 00:10:48,937
Yeah

311
00:10:48,947 --> 00:10:50,707
…
possibly you never know."

312
00:10:50,847 --> 00:10:51,347
You never know.

313
00:10:52,147 --> 00:10:52,447
Dig it.

314
00:10:52,667 --> 00:10:52,917
Dig it.

315
00:10:52,947 --> 00:10:53,007
Yeah.

316
00:10:53,467 --> 00:10:54,517
Uh, what about separate play?

317
00:10:54,567 --> 00:10:58,667
Because that was a big one for you, and
understandably so given your history.

318
00:10:58,737 --> 00:11:00,827
You were genuinely afraid of losing me.

319
00:11:00,887 --> 00:11:00,947
Yeah.

320
00:11:01,007 --> 00:11:05,567
There was that moment in your first play
experience where I went a second round.

321
00:11:05,607 --> 00:11:05,707
Yes.

322
00:11:05,787 --> 00:11:07,667
And you were ready to end me.

323
00:11:07,697 --> 00:11:08,007
Yes.

324
00:11:08,107 --> 00:11:13,227
Uh, so, you know, you laugh now,
but that was a real feeling.

325
00:11:13,267 --> 00:11:13,277
Yeah.

326
00:11:13,277 --> 00:11:15,337
Where does separate play sit today?

327
00:11:15,337 --> 00:11:16,407
Um- Is it still rare?

328
00:11:16,427 --> 00:11:18,327
Is it something that you've
gotten more comfortable with?

329
00:11:18,647 --> 00:11:21,246
I'm, I'm more, I'm com- way
more comfortable with it.

330
00:11:21,427 --> 00:11:21,567
Yeah.

331
00:11:21,867 --> 00:11:27,047
Um, it doesn't happen very
often, but it can, you know.

332
00:11:27,347 --> 00:11:29,907
Um, I'm still sometimes hesitant.

333
00:11:30,127 --> 00:11:30,327
Mm-hmm.

334
00:11:30,767 --> 00:11:32,907
Just because I just don't trust people.

335
00:11:33,347 --> 00:11:33,507
Yeah.

336
00:11:33,927 --> 00:11:38,837
Um, and it's not that I don't trust
you, it's you're a very sweet person,

337
00:11:39,227 --> 00:11:43,607
and you don't always see… You see
life through rose-colored glasses.

338
00:11:43,707 --> 00:11:43,927
Yeah.

339
00:11:44,247 --> 00:11:44,397
That's what

340
00:11:44,427 --> 00:11:44,467
I do.

341
00:11:44,467 --> 00:11:45,367
And I don't mind that.

342
00:11:45,587 --> 00:11:45,827
It's my thing.

343
00:11:45,827 --> 00:11:50,327
And I, and I love that about you, but
then I have to, I have to for the sake

344
00:11:50,367 --> 00:11:55,007
of our marriage and our relationship,
have to come on sometimes and be

345
00:11:55,047 --> 00:12:00,257
like, "All right, come back down."
"Hi, I'm your wife." I'm no one.

346
00:12:00,257 --> 00:12:00,857
Um, it's been a while.

347
00:12:00,907 --> 00:12:02,357
It's, we've never had to do that-

348
00:12:03,207 --> 00:12:03,337
Yeah

349
00:12:03,587 --> 00:12:06,027
…
any, like, any recent time.

350
00:12:06,467 --> 00:12:07,787
No, no, it's been a while.

351
00:12:07,797 --> 00:12:10,147
Um, it's been a while, but
that's still very, um…

352
00:12:10,647 --> 00:12:12,907
I've made a lot of
changes in my life- Yeah.

353
00:12:12,907 --> 00:12:15,567
Yeah … uh, that I guess
you have not been used to.

354
00:12:15,887 --> 00:12:16,167
Yeah.

355
00:12:16,307 --> 00:12:17,867
And have yet to really

356
00:12:18,587 --> 00:12:18,627
figure out.

357
00:12:18,627 --> 00:12:20,067
And I don't push my boundaries.

358
00:12:20,127 --> 00:12:23,927
Like, things happens, things are
said, I don't like s- you know,

359
00:12:24,027 --> 00:12:25,257
hold it against you or anything.

360
00:12:25,287 --> 00:12:28,767
It's just like, "Fuck. Learn
your lesson, dude." Um-

361
00:12:28,847 --> 00:12:29,317
Always have.

362
00:12:29,467 --> 00:12:29,947
Yeah.

363
00:12:30,027 --> 00:12:33,287
And I think that's where it's
scary on the separate play

364
00:12:33,306 --> 00:12:35,257
because- Somebody may not- I mean,

365
00:12:35,267 --> 00:12:37,127
what's the worst that could happen?

366
00:12:37,147 --> 00:12:37,167
Oh, God.

367
00:12:37,187 --> 00:12:40,847
What, what is it that, that
would make you go, "Ugh." Like,

368
00:12:40,907 --> 00:12:45,557
what… If, if I play separately-
Uh-huh … sans you, you're not there-

369
00:12:45,827 --> 00:12:46,167
Yeah

370
00:12:46,177 --> 00:12:48,637
and it's me and this other person
behind closed doors- Yeah … what

371
00:12:48,707 --> 00:12:53,237
is it exactly that is that nagging
feeling that goes, "Ah, I just-"

372
00:12:53,677 --> 00:12:57,267
That you're gonna want it
way more than you want me.

373
00:12:57,367 --> 00:12:58,167
Mm.

374
00:12:58,227 --> 00:12:58,487
Although

375
00:12:58,667 --> 00:12:58,677
I

376
00:12:58,747 --> 00:12:58,777
am-

377
00:12:59,107 --> 00:12:59,117
And

378
00:12:59,247 --> 00:12:59,727
that would happen behind closed doors?

379
00:12:59,767 --> 00:13:02,047
Although I am… Although, although
I'm here in front of you, right?

380
00:13:02,157 --> 00:13:03,547
So you- Yeah … you get it all the time.

381
00:13:03,647 --> 00:13:08,847
Well, so but that, if that were to
happen, that could happen in a full swap.

382
00:13:09,347 --> 00:13:10,337
That can happen any time, yeah.

383
00:13:10,367 --> 00:13:11,527
That could happen at any time.

384
00:13:11,667 --> 00:13:11,747
Yeah.

385
00:13:11,807 --> 00:13:14,667
It… Behind closed doors doesn't
really make a difference on that.

386
00:13:14,696 --> 00:13:14,706
Yeah.

387
00:13:14,727 --> 00:13:17,307
So what would it be behind
closed doors that would… Is it

388
00:13:17,367 --> 00:13:18,417
just that association of- That

389
00:13:18,447 --> 00:13:19,147
association

390
00:13:19,187 --> 00:13:19,907
No, no shit.

391
00:13:19,917 --> 00:13:20,227
Yeah.

392
00:13:20,347 --> 00:13:20,847
Wow.

393
00:13:20,907 --> 00:13:21,127
Yeah.

394
00:13:21,527 --> 00:13:22,547
That's fucking crazy.

395
00:13:22,767 --> 00:13:22,827
Yeah.

396
00:13:22,867 --> 00:13:23,667
But I get it.

397
00:13:24,107 --> 00:13:24,147
Yeah.

398
00:13:24,327 --> 00:13:25,387
I get it to an extent.

399
00:13:26,087 --> 00:13:31,187
Uh, but you know as well as I know
that that thought, that particular

400
00:13:31,267 --> 00:13:33,007
thought just doesn't really hold water.

401
00:13:33,627 --> 00:13:33,647
I

402
00:13:33,687 --> 00:13:35,127
mean- It's, it's kind of illogical

403
00:13:35,727 --> 00:13:36,507
…
you don't know.

404
00:13:36,927 --> 00:13:37,967
I, I know.

405
00:13:38,467 --> 00:13:43,567
The… My thing is, is that if you
associate that with him playing separately

406
00:13:43,587 --> 00:13:45,167
behind closed doors away from me-

407
00:13:45,427 --> 00:13:46,027
Yeah

408
00:13:46,037 --> 00:13:50,327
but you also know that I can have
that feeling in front of you during

409
00:13:50,387 --> 00:13:52,267
a full swap with you present.

410
00:13:53,007 --> 00:13:53,427
Yes.

411
00:13:53,807 --> 00:13:56,567
There's really no difference
between the two settings.

412
00:13:57,067 --> 00:13:59,827
I think I'm, I'm there- What the
hell … when I'm there- Uh … it's

413
00:13:59,867 --> 00:14:02,007
different because y- maybe you won't-

414
00:14:02,017 --> 00:14:03,607
'
Cause you can stay in my face?

415
00:14:03,707 --> 00:14:03,988
Yeah.

416
00:14:04,027 --> 00:14:05,087
And go, "Hey, look at me.

417
00:14:05,787 --> 00:14:06,147
Hello."

418
00:14:06,667 --> 00:14:06,917
Look who you-

419
00:14:06,957 --> 00:14:07,387
"
Here I am"

420
00:14:07,467 --> 00:14:08,667
…
look what you're going home with.

421
00:14:08,728 --> 00:14:09,247
That's right.

422
00:14:09,367 --> 00:14:13,537
Um, and then if I feel like
you're just too giddy, I'll

423
00:14:13,567 --> 00:14:14,887
have to say something negative.

424
00:14:15,827 --> 00:14:16,847
To bring me back down?

425
00:14:16,917 --> 00:14:18,467
To bring me back down

426
00:14:18,497 --> 00:14:18,827
to- Some things-

427
00:14:18,867 --> 00:14:19,247
…
fucking

428
00:14:19,327 --> 00:14:21,147
reality … some things don't change-

429
00:14:21,687 --> 00:14:22,687
Hey, I'm honest, man … from episode

430
00:14:22,728 --> 00:14:22,827
one.

431
00:14:22,967 --> 00:14:23,377
I know,

432
00:14:23,427 --> 00:14:23,637
I know.

433
00:14:23,637 --> 00:14:24,427
You know, I'm honest.

434
00:14:24,527 --> 00:14:28,187
I'm j- I am a jealous woman, guys.

435
00:14:28,217 --> 00:14:28,237
Oh, goodness.

436
00:14:28,237 --> 00:14:28,327
Like-

437
00:14:28,747 --> 00:14:28,947
So much

438
00:14:28,957 --> 00:14:33,467
so … it's… And it's not, it's not
even, um, the wa- it's a feeling, so,

439
00:14:33,547 --> 00:14:39,108
like, I don't want him to have any other
high- lovey feeling for anybody else.

440
00:14:39,208 --> 00:14:41,048
Like, I am his world.

441
00:14:41,228 --> 00:14:43,358
I am the air that this man breathes.

442
00:14:43,798 --> 00:14:43,818
Oh, man.

443
00:14:43,848 --> 00:14:44,548
Right, baby?

444
00:14:44,627 --> 00:14:45,188
Absolutely.

445
00:14:45,367 --> 00:14:45,527
See?

446
00:14:45,747 --> 00:14:47,718
Like, he can't breathe without me.

447
00:14:47,808 --> 00:14:47,948
100%, without even thinking.

448
00:14:47,948 --> 00:14:48,488
And so-

449
00:14:48,527 --> 00:14:48,627
Yeah

450
00:14:48,828 --> 00:14:50,108
…
that's where I get scared.

451
00:14:50,188 --> 00:14:54,228
I get scared because I'm like, "No,
motherfucker, you're gonna like the air

452
00:14:54,328 --> 00:14:58,637
over there 'cause it's all purified.
Bitch ain't got no kids." I know.

453
00:14:58,637 --> 00:15:04,468
"She's all by herself. Maybe she got a
dog." And it's like she's all independent,

454
00:15:04,588 --> 00:15:06,928
and I'm over here Ana Estrada, all-

455
00:15:07,108 --> 00:15:07,348
I think-

456
00:15:07,367 --> 00:15:08,747
I already have kids.

457
00:15:08,848 --> 00:15:12,348
I think you have to understand
that… I don't, I don't know if you

458
00:15:12,488 --> 00:15:16,587
realize this, but I am not the biggest
catch that you make me out to be.

459
00:15:16,747 --> 00:15:17,127
I mean,

460
00:15:17,198 --> 00:15:20,068
baby- Uh, so yeah, you could be
jealous of me all day long- … but

461
00:15:20,127 --> 00:15:22,387
hey, I'm still… I have kids.

462
00:15:23,108 --> 00:15:24,708
I'm an old-looking dude.

463
00:15:24,747 --> 00:15:26,568
You look younger than me, and you're not.

464
00:15:26,728 --> 00:15:26,747
No.

465
00:15:27,088 --> 00:15:28,228
You know, which is amazing.

466
00:15:28,287 --> 00:15:29,468
You've always looked younger than me.

467
00:15:30,048 --> 00:15:33,267
Um, you know, I, I got a friggin' podcast.

468
00:15:33,327 --> 00:15:35,047
What, what else do I
have going for me, guys?

469
00:15:35,087 --> 00:15:36,307
There's really nothing.

470
00:15:36,847 --> 00:15:37,087
Really

471
00:15:37,148 --> 00:15:37,238
nothing.

472
00:15:37,257 --> 00:15:37,968
I mean, you never know, right?

473
00:15:38,047 --> 00:15:40,448
Times have changed because
now there's sugar mamas.

474
00:15:40,547 --> 00:15:40,968
Oh, get it.

475
00:15:40,988 --> 00:15:41,267
So, like,

476
00:15:41,488 --> 00:15:41,747
I don't

477
00:15:41,767 --> 00:15:42,247
know.

478
00:15:42,257 --> 00:15:42,317
Get out of here with that.

479
00:15:42,327 --> 00:15:42,827
Um, and-

480
00:15:42,928 --> 00:15:43,688
The economy sucks.

481
00:15:43,728 --> 00:15:44,507
There ain't no sugar mamas.

482
00:15:44,567 --> 00:15:45,218
All sugar daddies.

483
00:15:45,718 --> 00:15:48,608
I mean, that's the only thing
that I kinda get terr- or scared

484
00:15:48,658 --> 00:15:50,077
about on the separate play.

485
00:15:50,158 --> 00:15:51,017
But I mean, I,

486
00:15:51,057 --> 00:15:52,307
it- It's more or less an insecurity

487
00:15:52,398 --> 00:15:54,208
…
it's an insecurity-
Yeah … and it's my insecurity.

488
00:15:54,358 --> 00:15:54,547
Yeah.

489
00:15:54,547 --> 00:15:58,598
Um, and I talk to my husband about it,
and if I'm okay with it, then it happens.

490
00:15:58,678 --> 00:16:01,678
If I'm not okay with it, sometimes
he understands and sometimes he

491
00:16:01,718 --> 00:16:03,517
doesn't, but he still respects me,

492
00:16:03,738 --> 00:16:03,747
so.

493
00:16:03,817 --> 00:16:05,198
I, you know, I have to accept-

494
00:16:05,257 --> 00:16:05,797
You respect

495
00:16:05,938 --> 00:16:08,118
me at least … even, even
if it's illogical, I'll

496
00:16:08,198 --> 00:16:09,438
question the hell out of it.

497
00:16:09,478 --> 00:16:09,567
Mm-hmm.

498
00:16:10,017 --> 00:16:11,317
And I'll try to-

499
00:16:11,358 --> 00:16:11,557
Yeah

500
00:16:11,797 --> 00:16:15,557
…
get you to see my logic in it,
but in, at the end of the day,

501
00:16:15,718 --> 00:16:16,817
I just have to support you-

502
00:16:16,908 --> 00:16:17,098
Yeah

503
00:16:17,178 --> 00:16:17,708
whatever your thoughts are.

504
00:16:17,708 --> 00:16:17,777
And

505
00:16:17,837 --> 00:16:23,618
I will say that I am super… I'm way
more s- more secure in myself than I was

506
00:16:23,698 --> 00:16:30,338
last year, um, because- You've had some
separate play, and I've been okay with it

507
00:16:30,418 --> 00:16:30,448
I have.

508
00:16:30,499 --> 00:16:31,038
Yeah, it's

509
00:16:31,038 --> 00:16:33,958
gone better than before Um, up
until recently, I didn't… I'm very

510
00:16:34,078 --> 00:16:36,038
question, question, question, question

511
00:16:36,179 --> 00:16:36,338
Yeah.

512
00:16:36,458 --> 00:16:38,478
No, I, I can- And … I
can attest to that.

513
00:16:38,498 --> 00:16:39,659
Yeah Now you've come a long way And

514
00:16:39,659 --> 00:16:40,719
it's kind of like

515
00:16:41,219 --> 00:16:42,259
And it's not awkward.

516
00:16:42,339 --> 00:16:45,819
So there was a time- Yeah … where you
would be like, "Oh, now, no, go ahead.

517
00:16:45,939 --> 00:16:49,440
Do your thing." Yeah And then I would
do it, and then you'd have, like, these

518
00:16:49,660 --> 00:16:55,019
long processing silences, and you didn't
know how to act for a while until we

519
00:16:55,099 --> 00:16:56,799
had this long, drawn-out conversation.

520
00:16:57,160 --> 00:16:58,819
It, it's not been like that.

521
00:16:59,340 --> 00:17:04,599
No, and I'm, and to not, like,
say it, uh, rudely, but I don't, I

522
00:17:04,619 --> 00:17:06,439
don't really care, 'cause if it's

523
00:17:06,939 --> 00:17:09,419
If it's, I, I, I guess I just don't care.

524
00:17:09,579 --> 00:17:12,508
I don't care, like in a care in
the sense of you, you already

525
00:17:12,579 --> 00:17:16,279
know how to, you already know how
to behave in our relationship.

526
00:17:16,379 --> 00:17:17,119
You already- Yeah … you know?

527
00:17:17,619 --> 00:17:20,149
A- and that's just another w- I don't
know what other way to say it, but-

528
00:17:20,239 --> 00:17:20,699
No, you're right

529
00:17:20,759 --> 00:17:22,419
…
you know, we both know how to act.

530
00:17:22,659 --> 00:17:25,538
Um, so yeah, I, I'm cool with it now.

531
00:17:25,598 --> 00:17:27,458
Like, it sounds like fun.

532
00:17:27,538 --> 00:17:27,548
Yeah.

533
00:17:27,558 --> 00:17:30,638
Like, I was not really
into friends with benefits.

534
00:17:30,818 --> 00:17:33,198
I was like, "Mm, I don't
really want that." I do.

535
00:17:33,458 --> 00:17:34,958
I want to go out.

536
00:17:35,858 --> 00:17:37,418
Um, I don't want to have
to pay for anything.

537
00:17:37,638 --> 00:17:39,398
I want to be treated like a queen.

538
00:17:39,458 --> 00:17:39,538
Yeah.

539
00:17:39,548 --> 00:17:39,558
Yeah.

540
00:17:39,598 --> 00:17:43,868
Um, take me out, you and your wife
or just you, and let's go out and

541
00:17:43,898 --> 00:17:46,758
let's go, you know, men or female.

542
00:17:47,318 --> 00:17:48,418
Men, women, or couples, huh?

543
00:17:48,418 --> 00:17:48,438
I don't

544
00:17:48,518 --> 00:17:48,838
care.

545
00:17:48,978 --> 00:17:52,438
Yeah, like let's go out and
have some fun and have some fun.

546
00:17:52,558 --> 00:17:54,698
You know what's crazy- Like, I'm
so down for that … is you just

547
00:17:54,758 --> 00:17:57,978
dropped this so matter-of-factly
on me- I did … yesterday.

548
00:17:58,038 --> 00:17:58,518
Yeah.

549
00:17:58,558 --> 00:18:00,018
Where you were like, yeah.

550
00:18:00,078 --> 00:18:03,138
Like first off, you mentioned it when
we were having sex, and so I just

551
00:18:03,198 --> 00:18:04,818
assumed that that was just hot talk.

552
00:18:04,898 --> 00:18:05,138
Yeah.

553
00:18:05,498 --> 00:18:07,848
And then afterwards you were
like, "So-" "Are you cool with

554
00:18:07,848 --> 00:18:10,018
that?" "… what we were talking
about, are you cool with that?" And

555
00:18:10,057 --> 00:18:12,297
I was like, "Are you serious?" Yeah.

556
00:18:12,338 --> 00:18:14,738
And you were like, "Yeah."
And I was like, "Fuck yeah."

557
00:18:14,898 --> 00:18:15,038
Yeah.

558
00:18:15,048 --> 00:18:16,158
"
I am cool with that.

559
00:18:16,218 --> 00:18:17,168
Like, by all means, cool." Like,

560
00:18:17,178 --> 00:18:18,878
we're down to be dated together.

561
00:18:18,938 --> 00:18:19,338
Yeah, I mean,

562
00:18:19,418 --> 00:18:19,448
obviously.

563
00:18:19,448 --> 00:18:20,018
But whatever.

564
00:18:20,078 --> 00:18:23,498
Like, and, and we're down to date, like
single women and you're down, you know?

565
00:18:23,608 --> 00:18:23,618
Yeah.

566
00:18:23,618 --> 00:18:27,498
But it's sometimes that's hard because
somebody's gonna like somebody more.

567
00:18:27,998 --> 00:18:31,178
Yeah, she's really looking for something
that's equal, and that's hard to do.

568
00:18:31,198 --> 00:18:31,778
It's very hard.

569
00:18:31,828 --> 00:18:31,868
It's hard to do.

570
00:18:31,868 --> 00:18:36,498
And, and I know it's hard because I
am, I don't wanna be hidden either.

571
00:18:36,638 --> 00:18:38,658
So like, I don't want, I'm not
gonna, I'm not a side chick.

572
00:18:38,758 --> 00:18:40,018
I am too good to be a side chick.

573
00:18:40,398 --> 00:18:40,918
I'm sorry.

574
00:18:41,278 --> 00:18:42,378
I'm sorry to you side chicks.

575
00:18:42,858 --> 00:18:46,058
By all means, I am meant to bloom and-

576
00:18:46,178 --> 00:18:47,778
That means, uh, open … be in the

577
00:18:47,878 --> 00:18:48,378
sun.

578
00:18:48,498 --> 00:18:54,438
Open uh, yeah, so when it comes
to you kind of seeking that out-

579
00:18:54,798 --> 00:18:54,978
Yeah

580
00:18:55,238 --> 00:18:58,898
…
uh, we've always said it would be
cool to find another couple that

581
00:18:58,998 --> 00:19:01,118
we can, we can be with equally.

582
00:19:01,198 --> 00:19:05,158
I mean, I'm not into guys, but I
can be besties with a guy easily.

583
00:19:05,198 --> 00:19:05,318
Yeah.

584
00:19:05,358 --> 00:19:06,708
You know, like- And you get
along with a lot of people

585
00:19:06,778 --> 00:19:07,358
…
uh, yeah, I do.

586
00:19:07,468 --> 00:19:07,478
Yeah.

587
00:19:07,498 --> 00:19:12,158
And, and so i- ideally it would be
nice, and, and I mean this with nothing

588
00:19:12,278 --> 00:19:15,447
but respect, but honestly, the only
thing that's really held us back on

589
00:19:15,458 --> 00:19:16,578
something like that was, has been you-

590
00:19:16,778 --> 00:19:17,268
Oh, yeah … in

591
00:19:17,268 --> 00:19:17,607
the past.

592
00:19:17,658 --> 00:19:18,008
For sure.

593
00:19:18,178 --> 00:19:20,478
Um, and it, it's hard for you- And it's-

594
00:19:20,478 --> 00:19:21,158
to connect with certain people.

595
00:19:21,198 --> 00:19:22,758
It is, because- But you've changed a lot

596
00:19:22,818 --> 00:19:23,958
…
yeah, I have.

597
00:19:24,058 --> 00:19:28,768
Um- Our, our, our besties
are a perfect example of that

598
00:19:29,208 --> 00:19:29,348
Yeah, yeah

599
00:19:29,768 --> 00:19:30,708
I like them both

600
00:19:30,908 --> 00:19:31,828
Yeah, it's true

601
00:19:32,169 --> 00:19:32,388
You know?

602
00:19:32,468 --> 00:19:34,009
And how rare is that?

603
00:19:34,509 --> 00:19:34,969
So rare

604
00:19:35,269 --> 00:19:35,929
Like rare

605
00:19:36,210 --> 00:19:36,609
So rare

606
00:19:36,729 --> 00:19:38,149
Um, I like them both.

607
00:19:38,969 --> 00:19:43,289
They're both super amazing people
They don't, ugh, I don't know.

608
00:19:43,409 --> 00:19:45,849
They're not over-intoxicated.

609
00:19:45,929 --> 00:19:46,489
Like, you know what I mean?

610
00:19:46,549 --> 00:19:46,859
Like, they don't-

611
00:19:46,989 --> 00:19:47,129
Yeah.

612
00:19:47,239 --> 00:19:50,208
They- Like, they know how to have a good
time like we know how to have a good time.

613
00:19:50,309 --> 00:19:50,569
Right.

614
00:19:50,879 --> 00:19:50,889
Right.

615
00:19:50,989 --> 00:19:51,188
You know?

616
00:19:51,319 --> 00:19:52,159
Like, we're there for- It doesn't

617
00:19:52,159 --> 00:19:52,169
get

618
00:19:52,189 --> 00:19:53,109
over, overdone.

619
00:19:53,169 --> 00:19:53,669
Exactly.

620
00:19:53,849 --> 00:19:57,829
Good in the marriage, their
relationship, their friendship.

621
00:19:58,469 --> 00:20:01,568
Um, and that's hard to find.

622
00:20:01,609 --> 00:20:02,259
It is hard to find.

623
00:20:02,299 --> 00:20:02,649
That's hard.

624
00:20:02,769 --> 00:20:06,309
If they were living closer,
what we want would be a thing.

625
00:20:06,689 --> 00:20:07,349
Yeah.

626
00:20:07,389 --> 00:20:07,849
For sure.

627
00:20:08,249 --> 00:20:09,509
Yeah, you're probably right on that one.

628
00:20:09,669 --> 00:20:09,709
Yeah.

629
00:20:09,849 --> 00:20:11,629
Uh, unfortunately they do not live closer.

630
00:20:11,729 --> 00:20:12,469
I know.

631
00:20:12,549 --> 00:20:14,929
And they will not be
living closer anytime soon.

632
00:20:15,399 --> 00:20:15,539
But, you know, I- So

633
00:20:15,569 --> 00:20:16,599
there are, there are things

634
00:20:16,629 --> 00:20:17,289
that stop these things

635
00:20:17,289 --> 00:20:17,339
so that's what I'm saying.

636
00:20:17,339 --> 00:20:18,338
Like, there are… Yeah.

637
00:20:18,338 --> 00:20:18,348
Yeah.

638
00:20:18,389 --> 00:20:21,329
And they're… And okay, so
that's, that's one couple.

639
00:20:21,609 --> 00:20:23,939
But I haven't… I just got into this.

640
00:20:23,978 --> 00:20:23,988
Right.

641
00:20:23,989 --> 00:20:25,929
Like, I just thought this, this mindset.

642
00:20:26,029 --> 00:20:26,229
Right.

643
00:20:26,349 --> 00:20:28,349
I just don't… Like I said,
I don't wanna be a side chick.

644
00:20:28,549 --> 00:20:34,269
I, I want somebody who's in the
lifestyle, who knows the rules, who

645
00:20:34,349 --> 00:20:38,179
is cool with stepping it up, you know?

646
00:20:38,199 --> 00:20:41,079
Would you ever entertain a
long-distance relationship?

647
00:20:41,579 --> 00:20:41,918
Yeah.

648
00:20:42,238 --> 00:20:42,499
Really?

649
00:20:42,819 --> 00:20:44,379
I mean, I, yeah, I would.

650
00:20:44,599 --> 00:20:47,158
And if you wanna fly me to you, hello.

651
00:20:47,658 --> 00:20:48,197
Okay.

652
00:20:48,217 --> 00:20:50,318
Yeah, because apparently
sleepovers are okay now.

653
00:20:50,818 --> 00:20:53,098
Um, you know, you're gonna fly us both.

654
00:20:53,798 --> 00:20:56,208
Um, 'cause my husband needs to make
sure you're not a serial killer.

655
00:20:56,208 --> 00:20:56,778
I gotta be close by.

656
00:20:56,788 --> 00:20:57,758
And, you know, I wanna meet you.

657
00:20:58,238 --> 00:20:59,298
It's not gonna be a rando.

658
00:20:59,378 --> 00:20:59,998
I wanna meet you.

659
00:21:00,038 --> 00:21:06,078
I wanna, you know… I, I don't
wanna, " Hi, let's go fuck." Nah.

660
00:21:06,478 --> 00:21:07,698
You don't wanna be transactional.

661
00:21:07,708 --> 00:21:08,718
Mm, I don't wanna be transactional.

662
00:21:08,818 --> 00:21:09,268
Yeah.

663
00:21:09,268 --> 00:21:09,278
No.

664
00:21:09,278 --> 00:21:10,877
'Cause we've already moved past that.

665
00:21:11,018 --> 00:21:12,078
I can do both.

666
00:21:12,138 --> 00:21:13,378
I can definitely do both.

667
00:21:13,438 --> 00:21:14,158
So I'm not gonna lie to you.

668
00:21:14,298 --> 00:21:14,938
I can do both.

669
00:21:14,958 --> 00:21:17,988
I can, in the spur of the moment, be
like, "You're hot. Let's go to the

670
00:21:18,038 --> 00:21:21,058
back." Um, I can definitely do that.

671
00:21:21,138 --> 00:21:22,778
I have no problem doing that.

672
00:21:23,398 --> 00:21:29,698
Um, but I prefer right now, I don't
know, a little bit of a, "Let's go have

673
00:21:29,758 --> 00:21:31,558
some drinks," although I don't drink.

674
00:21:32,268 --> 00:21:35,098
"Let's go have a smoke, and
then maybe we can get a room."

675
00:21:35,598 --> 00:21:36,438
And then, you know.

676
00:21:36,978 --> 00:21:37,298
Yeah.

677
00:21:37,538 --> 00:21:40,368
Well, that sounds like- Yeah … it's
gonna be an interesting, uh,

678
00:21:41,098 --> 00:21:43,948
an interesting second year-
Yeah … in the podcast.

679
00:21:44,018 --> 00:21:46,698
You're gonna, you guys are gonna catch
some interesting stories, I'm sure.

680
00:21:47,098 --> 00:21:50,808
Now, here's the one that I really wanted
to push up on, because at the very end

681
00:21:50,858 --> 00:21:53,048
of episode one, almost as a throwaway-

682
00:21:53,338 --> 00:21:53,838
Uh-huh

683
00:21:53,847 --> 00:21:56,958
you dropped something that
kinda surprised me even then.

684
00:21:57,098 --> 00:22:00,738
You said that you were starting to
think about playing solo with a couple-

685
00:22:00,748 --> 00:22:04,428
Yeah … without me, which was something
that you had never entertained before.

686
00:22:04,598 --> 00:22:08,338
That was a brand-new thought for you,
uh, when we recorded that episode.

687
00:22:08,438 --> 00:22:13,838
So we know, and if you've listened to
the podcast before, that did happen.

688
00:22:14,098 --> 00:22:14,558
Yeah.

689
00:22:14,678 --> 00:22:18,618
Um, and I'm just kinda curious
if you could recap your thoughts

690
00:22:18,678 --> 00:22:20,098
on it, like how it came about.

691
00:22:20,838 --> 00:22:25,478
W- uh, you know, was it a successful,
uh, you know, opportunity?

692
00:22:25,959 --> 00:22:29,378
Did it set you up for wanting to
do it again with somebody else?

693
00:22:29,478 --> 00:22:32,358
Or, uh, you know, give
us, give us the tea.

694
00:22:33,318 --> 00:22:35,218
Um, it was good.

695
00:22:35,718 --> 00:22:40,117
It was… I think it could've
been more fun now that I've

696
00:22:40,178 --> 00:22:41,797
had orgies and stuff like that.

697
00:22:42,297 --> 00:22:42,307
Yeah.

698
00:22:42,717 --> 00:22:42,737
Yeah.

699
00:22:42,758 --> 00:22:44,258
Um, it could've been… It, it, yeah.

700
00:22:44,317 --> 00:22:44,997
It was, um-

701
00:22:45,797 --> 00:22:47,697
I remember the initial part.

702
00:22:48,197 --> 00:22:50,877
W- we were all at the, uh,
we were all at the club.

703
00:22:51,197 --> 00:22:51,377
Yeah.

704
00:22:51,477 --> 00:22:56,857
And you and I were, uh, with, with
a friend of ours at our couch.

705
00:22:57,017 --> 00:22:57,297
Yes.

706
00:22:57,537 --> 00:23:00,997
And the couple that you were
interested and had been talking to,

707
00:23:01,357 --> 00:23:03,448
they were across the dance floor- Yes

708
00:23:03,477 --> 00:23:04,057
from us.

709
00:23:04,438 --> 00:23:06,897
And so you seemed very apprehensive.

710
00:23:07,077 --> 00:23:07,758
I remember- I was

711
00:23:07,837 --> 00:23:08,137
like, "I

712
00:23:08,177 --> 00:23:11,057
don't know" … it felt like dropping
off my kid at daycare for the first time.

713
00:23:11,098 --> 00:23:11,177
Yeah.

714
00:23:11,977 --> 00:23:15,017
Like, you just didn't wanna leave my
side, and it really took a lot to, to

715
00:23:15,037 --> 00:23:17,217
have you go, "Hey, just go on ahead."

716
00:23:17,377 --> 00:23:17,517
Yeah.

717
00:23:17,577 --> 00:23:20,477
And the only way that I really could
was telling our friend, "Hey, why

718
00:23:20,498 --> 00:23:21,998
don't you and I go to the back?

719
00:23:22,598 --> 00:23:25,137
Uh, and this way-" Yeah … you
know, as to kind of make it

720
00:23:25,178 --> 00:23:25,897
easier for you.

721
00:23:25,917 --> 00:23:28,937
And so, yeah, and so I said, "Well,
let's go." And so we went to the back.

722
00:23:29,337 --> 00:23:31,737
Um, and you were already back there.

723
00:23:32,537 --> 00:23:34,177
And it was, it was fun.

724
00:23:34,257 --> 00:23:36,837
Um, it was… I don't even
remember how it started.

725
00:23:36,877 --> 00:23:41,198
I think it was her and I first,
and then he jumped in, and

726
00:23:41,238 --> 00:23:42,678
then he finished with her.

727
00:23:43,619 --> 00:23:46,079
And it was pretty… It was okay.

728
00:23:46,119 --> 00:23:46,499
It was okay.

729
00:23:47,019 --> 00:23:48,239
It was okay.

730
00:23:48,720 --> 00:23:48,799
Yeah.

731
00:23:49,299 --> 00:23:53,299
I definitely like more girl-on-girl time.

732
00:23:53,519 --> 00:23:53,660
Yeah.

733
00:23:54,120 --> 00:23:58,259
Um, and I like playing with couples
as long as it's a girl-on-girl time-

734
00:23:58,679 --> 00:23:58,739
Mm

735
00:23:58,879 --> 00:24:00,040
…
is okay.

736
00:24:00,279 --> 00:24:03,319
You know, like, let me enjoy this or no.

737
00:24:03,759 --> 00:24:03,919
Yeah.

738
00:24:04,239 --> 00:24:07,259
Um, and the woman has to be bisexual.

739
00:24:07,319 --> 00:24:08,039
I don't do the bi-

740
00:24:08,519 --> 00:24:09,200
The bi, yeah

741
00:24:09,220 --> 00:24:09,359
…
bi

742
00:24:09,359 --> 00:24:09,980
situational

743
00:24:09,980 --> 00:24:10,059
situational.

744
00:24:10,099 --> 00:24:10,339
Mm-mm.

745
00:24:10,679 --> 00:24:12,700
Or just, uh, pretending to be bi for the

746
00:24:12,779 --> 00:24:12,999
sake- Yeah

747
00:24:13,019 --> 00:24:13,400
…
of the husband.

748
00:24:13,599 --> 00:24:13,819
No.

749
00:24:13,999 --> 00:24:14,400
Yeah, no.

750
00:24:14,439 --> 00:24:14,599
I've

751
00:24:14,599 --> 00:24:15,179
heard of that.

752
00:24:15,339 --> 00:24:15,540
Yeah.

753
00:24:15,719 --> 00:24:15,739
Yeah.

754
00:24:15,779 --> 00:24:20,959
Or if you tell me a rule of yours is
the one dick policy, nope, nah, 'cause

755
00:24:20,999 --> 00:24:22,859
your man controlling you, period.

756
00:24:23,679 --> 00:24:30,399
Um, so yeah, I mean, I, I liked it I
liked it, but I'm, uh, but I'm sure if

757
00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:32,099
it happens again, it would be better.

758
00:24:32,700 --> 00:24:32,819
Yeah?

759
00:24:33,220 --> 00:24:33,379
Yeah.

760
00:24:34,240 --> 00:24:35,619
Because I know- And, and
why, why do you say that?

761
00:24:36,059 --> 00:24:39,959
Um, because I know how to say
I want more girl and girl time.

762
00:24:40,259 --> 00:24:40,730
Oh, you're- You know?

763
00:24:40,730 --> 00:24:41,439
… you're more vocal

764
00:24:41,620 --> 00:24:41,679
now.

765
00:24:41,680 --> 00:24:42,499
Yeah, I'm more vocal.

766
00:24:42,599 --> 00:24:43,039
Gotcha.

767
00:24:43,120 --> 00:24:45,000
I can speak a little bit louder.

768
00:24:45,099 --> 00:24:45,139
I

769
00:24:45,260 --> 00:24:45,859
gotcha.

770
00:24:45,899 --> 00:24:46,080
Yeah.

771
00:24:46,099 --> 00:24:46,439
Yeah, yeah, yeah.

772
00:24:46,679 --> 00:24:46,779
Yeah.

773
00:24:46,840 --> 00:24:49,920
So you know how to express what you
want- Yes … and, and how to make

774
00:24:49,959 --> 00:24:50,959
that happen, and it's just- Yeah

775
00:24:50,999 --> 00:24:54,639
easier to be that aggressive
person who says- Yes … "Hey,

776
00:24:54,879 --> 00:24:56,160
let's, let's do it this way."

777
00:24:56,339 --> 00:24:56,519
Yeah.

778
00:24:56,819 --> 00:24:57,239
Yeah, yeah.

779
00:24:57,299 --> 00:24:57,719
Yeah, so.

780
00:24:58,359 --> 00:24:58,619
Dig it.

781
00:24:58,639 --> 00:24:58,740
Yeah.

782
00:24:58,979 --> 00:24:59,219
Dig it.

783
00:24:59,240 --> 00:24:59,499
I don't know.

784
00:24:59,839 --> 00:25:04,059
Uh, well, so you, you had your,
uh, first experience with a

785
00:25:04,120 --> 00:25:05,740
couple without your husband there.

786
00:25:05,780 --> 00:25:06,099
Mm-hmm.

787
00:25:06,199 --> 00:25:13,019
Um, is it, is it, like- Is it
your preference to have me there?

788
00:25:13,839 --> 00:25:20,140
Uh, like even just to watch, or, uh, is
it kinda hot to explore this by yourself?

789
00:25:20,740 --> 00:25:25,639
I think the next time I do it I, it would
be hotter whether you're there or not.

790
00:25:25,979 --> 00:25:27,979
Um, that one I wish you
would've been there.

791
00:25:28,159 --> 00:25:28,319
Uh-huh.

792
00:25:28,549 --> 00:25:30,318
'
Cause it probably, you probably
would've made it hotter.

793
00:25:30,579 --> 00:25:30,839
Okay.

794
00:25:31,379 --> 00:25:32,599
Um, just watching me.

795
00:25:32,639 --> 00:25:32,859
Yeah.

796
00:25:33,819 --> 00:25:38,619
Um, but my next one is going
to be extra hot, and I would

797
00:25:38,699 --> 00:25:40,699
rather you there to watch.

798
00:25:41,439 --> 00:25:41,509
That's

799
00:25:41,539 --> 00:25:41,549
fine.

800
00:25:41,559 --> 00:25:45,519
But if you can't, and if they just
want me, and I'd be like, "Okay, but

801
00:25:45,559 --> 00:25:47,579
I'm gonna push record, just an FYI."

802
00:25:47,679 --> 00:25:48,339
Okay.

803
00:25:48,379 --> 00:25:51,859
So- Well, hey, you know you're not gonna
hear any complaints from me on that one.

804
00:25:51,959 --> 00:25:52,478
I know.

805
00:25:52,618 --> 00:25:55,659
Uh, so yeah, I thought that was a
pretty cool- Yeah … situation.

806
00:25:55,699 --> 00:25:57,859
Anybody who hasn't listened
to the first episode-

807
00:25:58,049 --> 00:26:00,329
on that one, definitely
gotta check that part out.

808
00:26:00,804 --> 00:26:04,764
Hey, so we wanna talk about
something that actually is kind of

809
00:26:04,804 --> 00:26:06,725
important before we move any further

810
00:26:07,205 --> 00:26:10,804
Yeah, ProDX Health, and
here's why we love them

811
00:26:11,645 --> 00:26:13,124
They do at home testing.

812
00:26:13,464 --> 00:26:17,485
Like, you get a kit, you do
it at home, you mail it back

813
00:26:18,165 --> 00:26:22,444
STIs, hormones, real stuff that you
should really actually know about

814
00:26:22,764 --> 00:26:26,624
Yeah, and there's no waiting room, there's
no awkward conversations, none of that

815
00:26:27,225 --> 00:26:30,684
You just get your results, and if you need
next steps, they help you with that too

816
00:26:31,264 --> 00:26:35,844
Look, knowing what's going on with your
body is just part of taking care of

817
00:26:35,864 --> 00:26:38,044
yourself and the people that you're with

818
00:26:38,524 --> 00:26:39,104
Very true.

819
00:26:39,144 --> 00:26:39,984
It really is.

820
00:26:40,044 --> 00:26:44,704
And ProDX Health makes it so easy,
there's really no excuse not to

821
00:26:45,085 --> 00:26:45,565
That's right.

822
00:26:45,964 --> 00:26:48,644
Use code BAOMONO at prodxhealth.com.

823
00:26:48,684 --> 00:26:53,124
That's 15% off year-round,
even more during special events

824
00:26:53,745 --> 00:26:54,864
Link is in the show notes.

825
00:26:54,944 --> 00:26:55,824
Okay, now back to it

826
00:26:56,304 --> 00:26:56,864
Back to it

827
00:26:57,399 --> 00:27:01,359
Now, I wanna spend some time here,
because I think this is probably

828
00:27:01,379 --> 00:27:05,779
the biggest evolution I've seen in
you, and that's your relationship

829
00:27:05,819 --> 00:27:06,919
with men and the lifestyle.

830
00:27:06,929 --> 00:27:07,189
Mm-hmm.

831
00:27:07,279 --> 00:27:11,539
Because in episode one, you were pretty
openly not interested, and not only

832
00:27:11,559 --> 00:27:15,419
were you not interested, but when
men would reach out and be forward

833
00:27:15,459 --> 00:27:20,299
or aggressive, you said, and I quote,
"I used to get really offended."

834
00:27:21,219 --> 00:27:22,239
You called it creepy.

835
00:27:22,559 --> 00:27:24,279
You blocked people.

836
00:27:24,359 --> 00:27:28,539
And now I've watched you have full
conversations, give people second

837
00:27:28,599 --> 00:27:33,119
chances, even third chances, and even
develop real friendships with men in

838
00:27:33,139 --> 00:27:35,999
this community that you absolutely
would've written off back then.

839
00:27:36,079 --> 00:27:38,659
So what has changed?

840
00:27:38,839 --> 00:27:42,399
Um, I still know when
guys are being dicks.

841
00:27:42,799 --> 00:27:42,979
Yeah?

842
00:27:42,999 --> 00:27:43,819
I mean, I do.

843
00:27:43,919 --> 00:27:46,549
And I do still get… I still do block.

844
00:27:47,419 --> 00:27:50,459
Um, I still do, I still do all the things.

845
00:27:50,579 --> 00:27:51,119
Yeah, you still-

846
00:27:51,359 --> 00:27:52,439
Yeah … still doing everything the same?

847
00:27:52,989 --> 00:27:53,019
I vet them.

848
00:27:53,039 --> 00:27:55,799
I have to meet you a few times
before I message you, and I'm

849
00:27:55,819 --> 00:27:59,399
very… I'm always usually the
one that messages first sometimes.

850
00:27:59,409 --> 00:27:59,419
Yeah.

851
00:27:59,499 --> 00:28:00,379
Um…

852
00:28:00,399 --> 00:28:02,829
But you get a lot of messages
in your inbox- Oh, man

853
00:28:02,829 --> 00:28:03,819
of people that haven't met

854
00:28:03,919 --> 00:28:03,959
you.

855
00:28:03,979 --> 00:28:05,239
Every day.

856
00:28:05,319 --> 00:28:05,429
Yeah?

857
00:28:05,979 --> 00:28:06,719
Every day.

858
00:28:06,759 --> 00:28:10,239
And how do, does, do any of them
capture your attention- No … at all?

859
00:28:10,339 --> 00:28:10,409
No?

860
00:28:10,409 --> 00:28:10,639
None.

861
00:28:10,979 --> 00:28:12,279
Because you haven't met them in

862
00:28:12,359 --> 00:28:12,489
person.

863
00:28:12,519 --> 00:28:13,669
I haven't met them in person.

864
00:28:13,679 --> 00:28:13,919
Really?

865
00:28:14,009 --> 00:28:20,659
And it's like, "Oh, you're so hot,"
or "Oh, sexy." Yeah, I'm aware.

866
00:28:20,739 --> 00:28:21,009
Thanks.

867
00:28:21,659 --> 00:28:23,199
Does it offend you as much as it used

868
00:28:23,279 --> 00:28:23,419
to?

869
00:28:23,919 --> 00:28:29,699
It doesn't of- You know, it doesn't
offend me- As much because, because

870
00:28:29,720 --> 00:28:31,280
I think so little sometimes of men.

871
00:28:32,079 --> 00:28:35,740
Now, does that apply the same as… Uh,
you know, we've had this conversation

872
00:28:35,799 --> 00:28:39,219
before, and it was always a thing
where you would get dolled up.

873
00:28:39,280 --> 00:28:40,339
You would look fucking hot.

874
00:28:40,899 --> 00:28:43,960
Uh, you'd wear your little tank top with
no bra, and of course your nipples are

875
00:28:44,040 --> 00:28:48,319
pierced, and then you go to H-E-B, and
you go grocery shopping on a Sunday.

876
00:28:48,799 --> 00:28:53,279
And then all of these guys would be
gawking at you, like literally staring

877
00:28:53,399 --> 00:28:57,919
at your breasts as you stand in front of
them as if there's nothing else to you.

878
00:28:58,079 --> 00:28:58,400
Mm-hmm.

879
00:28:58,599 --> 00:29:02,079
And I remember every time you'd
get a look, you would get pissed.

880
00:29:02,220 --> 00:29:02,319
Yeah.

881
00:29:02,380 --> 00:29:05,339
And I'm talking, like,
ready to throw hands pissed.

882
00:29:05,459 --> 00:29:05,639
Yeah.

883
00:29:05,739 --> 00:29:08,519
And I was always kind of
thrown off by that because

884
00:29:08,560 --> 00:29:10,319
it's like, dude, you look hot.

885
00:29:10,519 --> 00:29:10,659
Yeah.

886
00:29:10,839 --> 00:29:12,479
You're dressed very hot.

887
00:29:12,919 --> 00:29:14,159
Uh, people are gonna stare.

888
00:29:14,499 --> 00:29:15,319
Mm-hmm.

889
00:29:15,360 --> 00:29:16,079
Like, it is what it is.

890
00:29:16,119 --> 00:29:20,219
Like, if I, if I wore, uh, really
tight underwear out someplace, I

891
00:29:20,279 --> 00:29:24,139
would be very, very curious as to why
nobody's looking at my crotch because

892
00:29:24,200 --> 00:29:25,499
that's kinda sticking out right now.

893
00:29:25,540 --> 00:29:25,759
You know what I

894
00:29:25,799 --> 00:29:25,880
mean?

895
00:29:25,899 --> 00:29:26,099
Yeah.

896
00:29:26,519 --> 00:29:29,899
So do you find… I know you still
find yourself in that situation.

897
00:29:29,999 --> 00:29:30,399
I do.

898
00:29:30,440 --> 00:29:31,339
Does it still piss you off

899
00:29:31,400 --> 00:29:31,719
like that?

900
00:29:31,739 --> 00:29:35,519
It doesn't piss me off as
much if it's done nicely.

901
00:29:35,739 --> 00:29:36,599
Like, I get it.

902
00:29:36,639 --> 00:29:38,639
I do go to H-E-B sometimes just for that.

903
00:29:39,199 --> 00:29:43,419
Not for that, but just 'cause…
Actually, yeah, sometimes I intentionally

904
00:29:43,500 --> 00:29:47,280
do that- … just for the fuck of it.

905
00:29:47,320 --> 00:29:51,239
Um, and I don't care 'cause I
always have that resting bitch face.

906
00:29:51,299 --> 00:29:55,579
So you can look at me, but I'm always
looking at you like, "Hmm, don't even

907
00:29:55,600 --> 00:29:59,758
think about it." Um, so… And if you
have the balls to come up to me, even

908
00:29:59,799 --> 00:30:04,439
with the resting bitch face, and, like,
try- Good job … then okay, amazing.

909
00:30:04,998 --> 00:30:06,659
You just won yourself the golden ticket.

910
00:30:06,698 --> 00:30:07,818
Because you just showed some

911
00:30:07,858 --> 00:30:08,398
balls.

912
00:30:08,439 --> 00:30:08,858
Yeah.

913
00:30:09,458 --> 00:30:12,818
Um- It's, yeah, uh, it doesn't
creep me out as much anymore.

914
00:30:12,878 --> 00:30:13,258
No?

915
00:30:13,298 --> 00:30:13,858
I'm good with it.

916
00:30:14,358 --> 00:30:17,758
Now, do you think some of that was
projection, like, because your approach

917
00:30:17,798 --> 00:30:21,238
with women is pretty bold and direct,
maybe you had to sit with the fact

918
00:30:21,248 --> 00:30:23,738
that men being forward isn't always-

919
00:30:23,878 --> 00:30:23,978
Yeah

920
00:30:23,988 --> 00:30:24,398
…
creepy?

921
00:30:24,478 --> 00:30:25,508
It's not a… Yeah.

922
00:30:25,678 --> 00:30:27,228
It's kind of the same energy-
Yeah … that you're bringing?

923
00:30:27,478 --> 00:30:28,318
It really is, 'cause-

924
00:30:28,388 --> 00:30:29,098
Because it's hard.

925
00:30:29,158 --> 00:30:32,858
It's hard having to be that person
that's, that has to make the first move-

926
00:30:32,978 --> 00:30:34,438
Yeah … or that has to show interest.

927
00:30:34,518 --> 00:30:38,018
And with you with other women, you've
realized you have to be that person.

928
00:30:38,078 --> 00:30:38,618
I do.

929
00:30:38,678 --> 00:30:40,518
Because a lot of women are not

930
00:30:40,548 --> 00:30:40,718
-
Yeah

931
00:30:40,838 --> 00:30:41,717
…
that person.

932
00:30:42,378 --> 00:30:42,638
So if

933
00:30:42,698 --> 00:30:43,198
you- It's hard

934
00:30:43,258 --> 00:30:45,808
…
if you wanna set something up with
a woman, you kinda have to play

935
00:30:45,818 --> 00:30:46,068
that

936
00:30:46,078 --> 00:30:46,718
part.

937
00:30:46,727 --> 00:30:46,747
Yeah, yeah.

938
00:30:46,778 --> 00:30:49,198
And you've felt creepy before with other

939
00:30:49,218 --> 00:30:49,228
women.

940
00:30:49,238 --> 00:30:51,118
I have, and I'm like, "Ugh, okay, fine."

941
00:30:51,198 --> 00:30:55,018
And I'm like, "This is how guys feel."
I'm telling you, this is how guys feel,

942
00:30:55,118 --> 00:30:57,158
and we're labeled creepy most of the time.

943
00:30:57,258 --> 00:30:57,718
Y'all are creepy.

944
00:30:57,748 --> 00:30:57,878
And

945
00:30:57,938 --> 00:30:59,198
we're just trying to be forward.

946
00:30:59,238 --> 00:31:01,078
We're just trying to get
our balls played with.

947
00:31:01,158 --> 00:31:01,618
That's all.

948
00:31:02,218 --> 00:31:03,738
Just, uh, tickle the pickles.

949
00:31:04,238 --> 00:31:09,197
So where do you stand on, uh, men
today in the lifestyle, not just as

950
00:31:09,228 --> 00:31:13,478
play partners, but as friends and
as part of our community, 'cause

951
00:31:13,648 --> 00:31:15,308
I feel like that's shifted a lot.

952
00:31:15,428 --> 00:31:20,448
Um, I, I give them the benefit of the
doubt on flirting and stuff like… Or

953
00:31:20,488 --> 00:31:23,658
not benefit of the doubt, but I give
them a little bit of leeway because

954
00:31:23,808 --> 00:31:25,158
flirting is hard, and flirting- Yeah

955
00:31:25,158 --> 00:31:25,908
with me is hard.

956
00:31:26,528 --> 00:31:32,708
Um, but I hope that most of them are,
are listening to this show and know that

957
00:31:32,758 --> 00:31:36,198
you don't have to try that hard with me.

958
00:31:36,678 --> 00:31:37,878
Like, let's just be cool.

959
00:31:38,338 --> 00:31:39,578
It's just, it's fun.

960
00:31:40,118 --> 00:31:43,398
Um, but when I know they're
not trying too much-

961
00:31:43,518 --> 00:31:43,718
Mm-hmm

962
00:31:43,818 --> 00:31:44,798
…
that's, that's nice.

963
00:31:45,078 --> 00:31:45,278
Yeah?

964
00:31:45,318 --> 00:31:45,438
Yeah.

965
00:31:45,478 --> 00:31:47,658
Like, I want you to try,
um, because- Don't be

966
00:31:47,718 --> 00:31:48,218
a dickhead

967
00:31:48,298 --> 00:31:49,748
but don't be… Yeah, don't be a dickhead.

968
00:31:49,858 --> 00:31:53,498
Like, don't, don't send me pictures of
your dick and think, like, I'm gonna be

969
00:31:53,558 --> 00:31:56,298
all oohing and aahing, 'cause I am not.

970
00:31:56,418 --> 00:32:01,158
Um, things like, like let's have
conversations, and so luckily

971
00:32:01,258 --> 00:32:06,298
that's what I've been getting, um,
conversations and I, I… Conversations.

972
00:32:06,558 --> 00:32:07,338
Conversations.

973
00:32:07,418 --> 00:32:08,638
Conversations.

974
00:32:08,718 --> 00:32:10,258
We're gonna get through
that word at some point.

975
00:32:10,738 --> 00:32:11,858
Conversations.

976
00:32:12,598 --> 00:32:13,398
And I love them.

977
00:32:13,918 --> 00:32:18,718
Um, and so they're, they're meaningful
and they're… I feel like even if the sex

978
00:32:18,758 --> 00:32:20,778
isn't good, we're still gonna be friends.

979
00:32:20,878 --> 00:32:21,418
Yeah.

980
00:32:21,478 --> 00:32:21,798
Yeah.

981
00:32:21,808 --> 00:32:21,818
Yeah.

982
00:32:21,858 --> 00:32:22,318
I like that.

983
00:32:22,698 --> 00:32:23,208
I like that.

984
00:32:23,208 --> 00:32:23,967
Yeah.

985
00:32:24,018 --> 00:32:27,998
Now, I wanna just get a little deeper
here, because in episode one you

986
00:32:28,038 --> 00:32:31,178
were really vulnerable about some
things that I think a lot of people

987
00:32:31,198 --> 00:32:35,318
in this lifestyle quietly carry,
uh, but they never say out loud.

988
00:32:35,678 --> 00:32:37,158
You talked about your past.

989
00:32:37,258 --> 00:32:37,518
Mm-hmm.

990
00:32:37,658 --> 00:32:41,698
Husband number one leaving you for someone
else, husband number two making you

991
00:32:41,758 --> 00:32:44,078
feel shame- Mm-hmm … after you played.

992
00:32:44,218 --> 00:32:44,488
Mm-hmm.

993
00:32:44,878 --> 00:32:48,068
And how all of that baggage
came into our relationship and

994
00:32:48,118 --> 00:32:49,558
into our lifestyle journey.

995
00:32:49,598 --> 00:32:49,848
Mm-hmm.

996
00:32:49,958 --> 00:32:54,138
You were genuinely afraid that the
lifestyle was going to change how I felt

997
00:32:54,238 --> 00:32:57,478
about you, or take me away from you.

998
00:32:57,538 --> 00:33:03,078
How much of that fear still lives in you
today, or has it gone away completely?

999
00:33:03,578 --> 00:33:04,939
I'm still a jealous person.

1000
00:33:05,478 --> 00:33:05,598
Yeah.

1001
00:33:05,718 --> 00:33:07,118
Um, I'm still very jealous of- Would

1002
00:33:07,179 --> 00:33:07,839
you say as bad?

1003
00:33:07,919 --> 00:33:08,138
I don't,

1004
00:33:08,218 --> 00:33:08,969
I don't feel it was bad.

1005
00:33:08,969 --> 00:33:09,838
No, not as bad.

1006
00:33:10,158 --> 00:33:14,818
Um, I want to have my own journey
in the lifestyle, and I think

1007
00:33:14,879 --> 00:33:19,238
that's where I get it now, the,
the friends with benefits thing.

1008
00:33:19,738 --> 00:33:22,618
Like, it's you as an
individual with whomever.

1009
00:33:22,778 --> 00:33:22,959
Mm-hmm.

1010
00:33:23,159 --> 00:33:23,169
Mm-hmm.

1011
00:33:23,198 --> 00:33:25,618
And I, I'm ready for that now.

1012
00:33:25,639 --> 00:33:28,418
Like, I'm ready, like, "Oh, okay.
That, that sounds kind of fun." Mm-hmm.

1013
00:33:28,418 --> 00:33:34,459
"Let's, let's try that." Um, so… But I
still get jealous over you spending time

1014
00:33:34,498 --> 00:33:35,838
with people if that ever… You know?

1015
00:33:36,018 --> 00:33:38,418
Like, it's- Yeah … it's
still, it's, it's still a

1016
00:33:38,458 --> 00:33:41,319
feeling, but I don't portray it.

1017
00:33:41,360 --> 00:33:43,879
I don't let it consume me.

1018
00:33:44,000 --> 00:33:48,118
And You are very transparent
To the most part.

1019
00:33:48,258 --> 00:33:48,458
Mm-hmm.

1020
00:33:48,618 --> 00:33:49,168
You know what I mean?

1021
00:33:49,278 --> 00:33:50,397
Like, enough.

1022
00:33:50,458 --> 00:33:50,918
It's enough.

1023
00:33:50,978 --> 00:33:51,678
It's enough for me.

1024
00:33:52,038 --> 00:33:52,158
Yeah.

1025
00:33:52,298 --> 00:33:53,358
Um, but yeah.

1026
00:33:53,858 --> 00:33:54,818
I forgot what the question was.

1027
00:33:55,318 --> 00:33:56,288
Well, I mean, you answered.

1028
00:33:56,308 --> 00:33:56,937
Oh, like jealousy.

1029
00:33:57,118 --> 00:33:57,438
Yeah.

1030
00:33:58,228 --> 00:33:58,238
Yeah.

1031
00:33:58,257 --> 00:33:59,638
And the fear that lives in you-

1032
00:33:59,738 --> 00:34:00,318
Yeah … that's still around.

1033
00:34:00,378 --> 00:34:03,378
Yeah, I mean, it's still there,
but it's not as much, for sure.

1034
00:34:03,448 --> 00:34:03,458
Yeah.

1035
00:34:03,458 --> 00:34:04,788
It's not… It- I don't bring it up

1036
00:34:04,918 --> 00:34:05,108
so often.

1037
00:34:05,108 --> 00:34:08,878
I, I think I've expressed to you that
we've built an entire life together.

1038
00:34:09,298 --> 00:34:13,148
We've raised kids together, we have
a, a home and cars and everything.

1039
00:34:13,208 --> 00:34:14,278
Like, we've done together.

1040
00:34:14,298 --> 00:34:14,317
Yeah.

1041
00:34:14,368 --> 00:34:15,548
We have a podcast together.

1042
00:34:16,038 --> 00:34:20,778
I mean, we are… It's always been our
relationship, first and foremost, in

1043
00:34:20,818 --> 00:34:22,827
my brain- Yeah … over anything else.

1044
00:34:23,338 --> 00:34:27,738
And I think that you finally understand
that, that I mean it when I say

1045
00:34:27,818 --> 00:34:28,218
that.

1046
00:34:28,278 --> 00:34:31,198
Yeah, and I… Yes, and I know
you're not… I know no one is

1047
00:34:31,208 --> 00:34:32,838
going to take you away from me.

1048
00:34:32,958 --> 00:34:33,178
No.

1049
00:34:33,598 --> 00:34:33,838
So-

1050
00:34:34,147 --> 00:34:34,157
Nah.

1051
00:34:34,198 --> 00:34:34,638
I don't care how-

1052
00:34:34,678 --> 00:34:35,648
I'm, I'm way more secure-

1053
00:34:35,648 --> 00:34:36,698
good the vagina is.

1054
00:34:36,818 --> 00:34:40,058
Yeah, I'm way more secure
in my relationship, so.

1055
00:34:40,358 --> 00:34:41,438
That's wonderful.

1056
00:34:41,498 --> 00:34:42,138
That's a happy-

1057
00:34:42,398 --> 00:34:42,518
So,

1058
00:34:42,638 --> 00:34:43,698
yeah … a happy ending there.

1059
00:34:43,858 --> 00:34:46,778
I just wanna ask you something that
I think will resonate with a lot of

1060
00:34:46,838 --> 00:34:50,638
our listeners, especially the ones
who are earlier in their journey.

1061
00:34:50,648 --> 00:34:50,688
Mm-hmm.

1062
00:34:50,768 --> 00:34:51,568
The newbies.

1063
00:34:52,438 --> 00:34:56,778
What did healing from that shame that
you were given actually look like to you?

1064
00:34:56,798 --> 00:34:58,158
Because it didn't just disappear.

1065
00:34:58,318 --> 00:34:59,698
You did the work.

1066
00:34:59,818 --> 00:35:04,018
Um, I remember when, you know, in the
very, very beginning, you crying to me,

1067
00:35:04,178 --> 00:35:08,417
feeling like it, that this was wrong, that
we were- Yes … doing something wrong.

1068
00:35:08,698 --> 00:35:08,958
Yeah.

1069
00:35:09,118 --> 00:35:13,138
Um, and obviously you are
flip-flopped to the other side there.

1070
00:35:13,198 --> 00:35:13,478
Yeah.

1071
00:35:13,718 --> 00:35:16,838
There's been some healing, there's
been some things that, you know,

1072
00:35:16,938 --> 00:35:21,148
you're, you're no longer completely
disassociating, uh, and- No

1073
00:35:21,158 --> 00:35:24,438
and getting out of your body
whenever you have sexual experiences,

1074
00:35:24,478 --> 00:35:25,568
like you did the first year-

1075
00:35:25,698 --> 00:35:26,058
Yeah

1076
00:35:26,068 --> 00:35:26,798
…
that we did it.

1077
00:35:26,858 --> 00:35:27,417
Yeah.

1078
00:35:27,558 --> 00:35:31,448
So, I mean, w- how, how
did you heal from that?

1079
00:35:31,518 --> 00:35:32,198
Like, what, what- You

1080
00:35:32,238 --> 00:35:32,408
know,

1081
00:35:32,478 --> 00:35:33,448
it- Where did we go from here?

1082
00:35:33,558 --> 00:35:37,938
It took a lot of, of communication,
because I've had to realize

1083
00:35:37,978 --> 00:35:40,098
that it was me, it was my…

1084
00:35:40,198 --> 00:35:44,138
They were my insecurities,
not our insecurities.

1085
00:35:44,278 --> 00:35:48,398
Mm. You weren't doing things on purpose
to me to make me feel a certain way.

1086
00:35:49,018 --> 00:35:50,978
Um, you weren't doing it maliciously.

1087
00:35:51,738 --> 00:35:54,438
You weren't hurting me intentionally.

1088
00:35:54,968 --> 00:35:55,008
Mm-hmm.

1089
00:35:55,098 --> 00:35:59,388
So once you come to that, and then
you kind of sit back and just be like,

1090
00:35:59,438 --> 00:36:04,367
"Okay." Because I've been married to
some assholes, like straight up assholes.

1091
00:36:04,918 --> 00:36:07,218
I've been married to
men who manipulated me.

1092
00:36:07,298 --> 00:36:12,598
I've been married to men who
just straight up lied to me, and

1093
00:36:13,298 --> 00:36:14,938
you're not one of those guys.

1094
00:36:15,778 --> 00:36:15,938
No.

1095
00:36:16,098 --> 00:36:20,878
And so that's where it's like,
okay, I had to realize that.

1096
00:36:20,978 --> 00:36:22,718
I had to realize that you
weren't one of those guys.

1097
00:36:23,318 --> 00:36:24,698
But that takes a lot too.

1098
00:36:24,758 --> 00:36:29,337
Like, that takes a lot of maturity,
I know, in your, in your head.

1099
00:36:30,098 --> 00:36:33,538
And, and for men or
for, you know, or women.

1100
00:36:34,178 --> 00:36:37,158
So that, that's having a lot
of conversations with you.

1101
00:36:37,598 --> 00:36:41,075
And, you know, it's gotta be
exhausting to be so- and distrusting

1102
00:36:41,395 --> 00:36:42,134
Oh my God

1103
00:36:42,174 --> 00:36:47,235
…
and to feel so constantly just
jealous and insecure about things.

1104
00:36:47,315 --> 00:36:48,176
Like, it's gotta be exhausting.

1105
00:36:48,195 --> 00:36:49,756
It, it has be- I had
to be okay with myself.

1106
00:36:50,116 --> 00:36:50,255
Yeah.

1107
00:36:50,536 --> 00:36:56,276
So, like, I know, um, I know
that I'm having a, I know that

1108
00:36:56,315 --> 00:36:58,815
I'm having a, a rough day.

1109
00:36:59,295 --> 00:37:00,496
I don't wanna talk about the lifestyle.

1110
00:37:00,695 --> 00:37:00,756
Right.

1111
00:37:00,756 --> 00:37:00,855
Right.

1112
00:37:01,676 --> 00:37:03,395
And you, you know,
you'll see it in my face.

1113
00:37:03,515 --> 00:37:04,575
I don't wanna talk about that.

1114
00:37:04,674 --> 00:37:04,755
Yeah.

1115
00:37:04,836 --> 00:37:05,935
I don't wanna do this.

1116
00:37:06,076 --> 00:37:12,336
I don't wanna have to, um- express to
you, ugh, you know, the negative part.

1117
00:37:12,836 --> 00:37:17,316
A- and so you realize that and it's so
m- it makes it easier now, you know?

1118
00:37:17,476 --> 00:37:17,976
There you go.

1119
00:37:18,096 --> 00:37:19,416
I did, I did some work.

1120
00:37:19,916 --> 00:37:20,016
You did.

1121
00:37:20,076 --> 00:37:25,396
Uh, this is one of my favorites because
it's about you becoming more fully you.

1122
00:37:25,436 --> 00:37:25,516
Yeah.

1123
00:37:25,596 --> 00:37:30,236
Uh, in episode one, you admitted something
that I think surprised a lot of people.

1124
00:37:30,736 --> 00:37:34,196
You said you had basically
no sexual confidence.

1125
00:37:34,596 --> 00:37:34,606
No.

1126
00:37:34,656 --> 00:37:36,356
You didn't get on top and ride.

1127
00:37:36,876 --> 00:37:39,516
You weren't sure if you were good at it.

1128
00:37:39,576 --> 00:37:43,886
And now, and I mean, y- you're not
that person anymore, obviously.

1129
00:37:43,926 --> 00:37:44,426
No.

1130
00:37:44,506 --> 00:37:48,446
So I wanna talk about that arc
from one place to the other.

1131
00:37:48,486 --> 00:37:50,646
Where does your confidence sit today?

1132
00:37:50,686 --> 00:37:51,626
Like-

1133
00:37:51,746 --> 00:37:51,876
Um-

1134
00:37:51,956 --> 00:37:53,206
…
how did you get there?

1135
00:37:53,246 --> 00:37:56,686
Uh, well, I, I'm having sex in
front of people with the best

1136
00:37:56,726 --> 00:37:58,046
person I know how to have sex with.

1137
00:37:58,906 --> 00:37:59,196
Mm. Getting

1138
00:37:59,386 --> 00:38:00,036
some good practice in.

1139
00:38:00,036 --> 00:38:04,266
So, and I, yeah, and I know what you
like, and so I really do it for you.

1140
00:38:04,366 --> 00:38:06,646
But then if I see people around,
it's like, okay, I get to be-

1141
00:38:06,966 --> 00:38:07,046
It's

1142
00:38:07,066 --> 00:38:08,686
hard to put on a show … I
get to be a porn star- Yeah,

1143
00:38:08,706 --> 00:38:09,866
yeah … you know, in my own head.

1144
00:38:09,966 --> 00:38:10,686
So it's like, yeah.

1145
00:38:11,246 --> 00:38:13,486
Um, and I love my body.

1146
00:38:13,906 --> 00:38:17,386
I w- I wish it was better,
but I love my body.

1147
00:38:17,626 --> 00:38:17,706
Yeah.

1148
00:38:17,786 --> 00:38:18,926
I love my boobs.

1149
00:38:19,046 --> 00:38:24,666
I love, you know, every inch of
my body, I have no problem with.

1150
00:38:25,216 --> 00:38:29,736
What's funny is, because it's like
you said, we, we're exhibitionists,

1151
00:38:29,946 --> 00:38:34,986
so it's hard to not have confidence
in your body when you know you're

1152
00:38:35,006 --> 00:38:36,626
putting on a show for people.

1153
00:38:36,636 --> 00:38:40,586
And so that was always a hard thing for
me because I don't find myself attractive.

1154
00:38:40,686 --> 00:38:43,426
I don't think I'm a,
uh, an attractive body.

1155
00:38:43,546 --> 00:38:43,806
Yeah.

1156
00:38:43,906 --> 00:38:50,086
Uh, and what kind of got me out of it
was as we put on shows at, at house

1157
00:38:50,206 --> 00:38:55,886
parties- Mm-hmm … and at clubs and
wherever we go, um, we have had very hot

1158
00:38:56,006 --> 00:39:00,326
couples that we both have agreed are,
like, severely smoking hot come up to

1159
00:39:00,366 --> 00:39:02,126
us and go, "Damn, that was hot." Yeah.

1160
00:39:02,126 --> 00:39:03,586
"That was a hot show
you guys put on." Yeah.

1161
00:39:03,606 --> 00:39:04,446
Blah, blah, blah.

1162
00:39:04,526 --> 00:39:07,136
And we would both sit
back and go, "Really?"

1163
00:39:07,636 --> 00:39:08,036
Okay.

1164
00:39:08,156 --> 00:39:08,636
For real?

1165
00:39:08,816 --> 00:39:08,976
Yeah.

1166
00:39:09,856 --> 00:39:10,096
Okay.

1167
00:39:10,176 --> 00:39:15,996
And then, a- and so that's when I started
realizing, okay, w- we are kinda hot,

1168
00:39:16,096 --> 00:39:16,596
you

1169
00:39:16,616 --> 00:39:16,716
know?

1170
00:39:17,016 --> 00:39:17,046
Yeah.

1171
00:39:17,046 --> 00:39:17,376
Yeah.

1172
00:39:17,876 --> 00:39:18,316
Okay.

1173
00:39:18,836 --> 00:39:22,656
Uh, and so that, that kind of helped
when it came to the exhibitionism

1174
00:39:22,736 --> 00:39:24,176
to kinda get out of my own head-

1175
00:39:24,236 --> 00:39:24,616
Yeah

1176
00:39:24,625 --> 00:39:27,526
on my body issues- Yeah … on
my confidence issues.

1177
00:39:27,986 --> 00:39:27,996
Yeah.

1178
00:39:28,076 --> 00:39:34,056
Um, you, you kind of have moments
of so confident you're cocky.

1179
00:39:34,556 --> 00:39:36,576
Um, like your shit don't stink.

1180
00:39:36,716 --> 00:39:38,736
And I, and I think personally-

1181
00:39:38,806 --> 00:39:39,506
Only with certain

1182
00:39:39,516 --> 00:39:41,696
people … that that
is a coping mechanism.

1183
00:39:41,716 --> 00:39:41,936
It is.

1184
00:39:41,976 --> 00:39:42,106
It's

1185
00:39:42,136 --> 00:39:42,636
like a defense mechanism.

1186
00:39:42,636 --> 00:39:46,076
Only, only around certain
people, um, that I don't like.

1187
00:39:46,576 --> 00:39:46,716
Yeah.

1188
00:39:46,756 --> 00:39:47,896
And it's very rare.

1189
00:39:47,976 --> 00:39:48,216
I mean-

1190
00:39:48,616 --> 00:39:48,706
Yeah,

1191
00:39:48,796 --> 00:39:50,816
I dig it … I don't ever see these
people, and when I do it's like,

1192
00:39:50,956 --> 00:39:52,416
please, don't even come in my face.

1193
00:39:53,236 --> 00:39:55,776
Um, but it's very rare.

1194
00:39:55,936 --> 00:39:56,556
Yeah, yeah.

1195
00:39:56,576 --> 00:39:56,676
So

1196
00:39:56,756 --> 00:39:56,876
yeah.

1197
00:39:56,976 --> 00:39:57,836
I dig it, I dig it.

1198
00:39:57,856 --> 00:39:57,866
Yeah.

1199
00:39:57,896 --> 00:39:58,516
I understand that.

1200
00:39:59,076 --> 00:40:02,196
Uh, y- I just always found that funny
because, you know, I know you, I'm your

1201
00:40:02,216 --> 00:40:04,256
best friend, we know each other very well.

1202
00:40:04,416 --> 00:40:09,176
I know deep down inside you are humble
and you, you do deal with your confidence

1203
00:40:09,236 --> 00:40:10,116
issues.

1204
00:40:10,126 --> 00:40:10,146
Of course.

1205
00:40:10,156 --> 00:40:13,316
But you damn sure don't
let people see it in, in-

1206
00:40:13,316 --> 00:40:13,676
No

1207
00:40:14,156 --> 00:40:16,316
…
uh, in the club or wherever we're at.

1208
00:40:16,456 --> 00:40:20,595
You let that confidence that
you do have out in the front.

1209
00:40:20,776 --> 00:40:21,136
Yes.

1210
00:40:21,226 --> 00:40:21,716
So I dig that.

1211
00:40:21,796 --> 00:40:22,676
I think that's pretty cool.

1212
00:40:22,746 --> 00:40:22,756
Yes.

1213
00:40:22,776 --> 00:40:26,116
And you make it easier for
me to exude confidence.

1214
00:40:26,176 --> 00:40:26,576
Yeah.

1215
00:40:26,616 --> 00:40:26,636
Oh, good.

1216
00:40:26,676 --> 00:40:29,056
You kind of bring me out of
my shell, which is what I

1217
00:40:29,176 --> 00:40:29,206
need.

1218
00:40:29,206 --> 00:40:30,076
You should be confident, baby.

1219
00:40:30,116 --> 00:40:30,636
You sexy.

1220
00:40:30,836 --> 00:40:32,076
Ah, thank you.

1221
00:40:32,916 --> 00:40:35,485
Anyways, let's talk
about the ADHD diagnosis.

1222
00:40:35,856 --> 00:40:36,696
Uh- Wah.

1223
00:40:36,836 --> 00:40:40,416
Yeah, because that changed a lot
for you, especially socially.

1224
00:40:40,456 --> 00:40:44,196
Pre-medication Pris had
lost the social butterfly.

1225
00:40:44,256 --> 00:40:44,286
Yes.

1226
00:40:44,286 --> 00:40:46,836
You were anxious, you were
not, uh, having a good time.

1227
00:40:47,376 --> 00:40:50,456
Uh, you were relying on
substances to loosen you up.

1228
00:40:50,716 --> 00:40:51,056
Yes.

1229
00:40:51,256 --> 00:40:53,576
Uh, you had the resting bitch
face that made people think

1230
00:40:53,616 --> 00:40:54,556
that you didn't like 'em.

1231
00:40:55,496 --> 00:40:57,916
Post-medication, completely
different person.

1232
00:40:57,976 --> 00:40:58,876
Ah, well, maybe.

1233
00:40:58,916 --> 00:40:59,236
I don't know.

1234
00:40:59,296 --> 00:41:01,066
I w- I don't know if I would
say- … completely different

1235
00:41:01,096 --> 00:41:02,836
person, but a different person.

1236
00:41:02,896 --> 00:41:06,176
What's the biggest lifestyle related
difference that you've noticed?

1237
00:41:06,336 --> 00:41:07,036
Um, I-

1238
00:41:07,076 --> 00:41:07,996
Since taking your meds.

1239
00:41:08,556 --> 00:41:09,896
People don't bore me.

1240
00:41:09,956 --> 00:41:10,146
Yeah?

1241
00:41:10,646 --> 00:41:11,556
They catch your attention a

1242
00:41:11,626 --> 00:41:11,976
bit more?

1243
00:41:12,066 --> 00:41:12,076
Yeah.

1244
00:41:12,166 --> 00:41:13,646
Um, yes.

1245
00:41:14,346 --> 00:41:18,966
So you guys, if you know, if you listen
to the show and he doesn't edit every

1246
00:41:19,046 --> 00:41:23,906
single, "Oh, I forgot what I just said,"
or, "I forgot the question," um, it's

1247
00:41:23,926 --> 00:41:25,586
because I haven't taken my meds today.

1248
00:41:25,646 --> 00:41:26,906
And so my brain's everywhere.

1249
00:41:26,926 --> 00:41:31,366
And if you are… I swear, I'm pretty
sure I have some kind of autism.

1250
00:41:31,686 --> 00:41:33,456
I mean I am a little bit-

1251
00:41:33,876 --> 00:41:34,986
I mean, that's undiagnosed

1252
00:41:34,996 --> 00:41:36,466
…
I am very special.

1253
00:41:36,966 --> 00:41:38,906
And yes.

1254
00:41:39,406 --> 00:41:40,246
There you go.

1255
00:41:40,266 --> 00:41:40,826
There you go.

1256
00:41:41,326 --> 00:41:41,496
So yeah.

1257
00:41:41,966 --> 00:41:45,746
Now, just for fun, back in episode
one, I told everybody my secret

1258
00:41:45,776 --> 00:41:47,516
for dealing with social anxiety.

1259
00:41:47,736 --> 00:41:47,956
Yes.

1260
00:41:48,016 --> 00:41:49,556
The actor in a movie trick.

1261
00:41:49,796 --> 00:41:54,256
Uh, do you have a trick, uh, something
that helps you show up as Pris when you

1262
00:41:54,336 --> 00:41:57,176
talk, uh, to other people at an event?

1263
00:41:57,496 --> 00:41:57,616
Yes.

1264
00:41:57,656 --> 00:42:01,886
Uh, because I know that for the longest
time you've always said, "Well, I

1265
00:42:01,916 --> 00:42:05,356
don't like to have conversations
without you because you, you

1266
00:42:05,436 --> 00:42:06,906
always lead the conversations- Yeah

1267
00:42:06,906 --> 00:42:09,595
and I just kind of bounce off of
you, and if you're not there, I

1268
00:42:09,616 --> 00:42:11,035
don't think I know how to talk."

1269
00:42:11,076 --> 00:42:11,576
Yeah.

1270
00:42:11,676 --> 00:42:13,396
Um, w- what is it now?

1271
00:42:14,016 --> 00:42:17,396
Um, somebody asked me
this at the club, I think.

1272
00:42:17,456 --> 00:42:18,776
Yeah, I think it was a club.

1273
00:42:18,876 --> 00:42:23,986
Um, first of all, when y- Let me tell you
how I show up all the time feeling like

1274
00:42:24,116 --> 00:42:25,826
I wanna exude this confidence, right?

1275
00:42:26,326 --> 00:42:31,126
I stand up straight and I just,
like, take some deep breaths and

1276
00:42:31,406 --> 00:42:33,366
I'm like, "Okay, you got this.

1277
00:42:33,626 --> 00:42:34,326
Don't fall.

1278
00:42:34,926 --> 00:42:36,046
Be nice to people.

1279
00:42:36,286 --> 00:42:36,946
Smile."

1280
00:42:37,186 --> 00:42:37,416
Mm-hmm.

1281
00:42:37,796 --> 00:42:43,346
"
And, you know, just exude
that, that I got this shit."

1282
00:42:43,846 --> 00:42:44,316
Okay.

1283
00:42:44,606 --> 00:42:44,986
Yeah, yeah.

1284
00:42:45,126 --> 00:42:46,486
Um, and talk to people.

1285
00:42:46,606 --> 00:42:50,046
So like I… Yeah, no, I can have
conversations now for the most

1286
00:42:50,086 --> 00:42:53,146
part with people, but sometimes
I'm all over the place, and a lot

1287
00:42:53,166 --> 00:42:54,186
of people don't understand that.

1288
00:42:54,386 --> 00:42:54,606
Right.

1289
00:42:54,826 --> 00:42:55,006
So-

1290
00:42:55,246 --> 00:42:55,356
Right

1291
00:42:55,386 --> 00:42:57,426
…
um, I need you there sometimes
to kind of pull me away.

1292
00:42:58,206 --> 00:42:58,746
Gotcha.

1293
00:42:59,286 --> 00:42:59,426
But yeah.

1294
00:42:59,466 --> 00:42:59,666
Yeah.

1295
00:42:59,766 --> 00:43:00,326
So there you go.

1296
00:43:00,486 --> 00:43:03,076
Try to be Stella after she's
gotten her groove back.

1297
00:43:03,136 --> 00:43:04,166
Yeah.

1298
00:43:04,196 --> 00:43:04,766
Hell yeah.

1299
00:43:04,806 --> 00:43:05,306
Yes.

1300
00:43:05,366 --> 00:43:08,866
You know, I wanna take a second before
we close out because I think what today's

1301
00:43:08,926 --> 00:43:12,486
episode really shows is something that
we don't talk about enough in this

1302
00:43:12,496 --> 00:43:18,266
community, and that is that this lifestyle
is not a destination, it's a journey.

1303
00:43:18,586 --> 00:43:18,926
Mm-hmm.

1304
00:43:19,166 --> 00:43:23,406
Uh, the person that Pris was in episode
one, the rules she had, the fears she

1305
00:43:23,486 --> 00:43:28,676
carried, the walls she put up, all of that
made complete sense for who she was at

1306
00:43:28,706 --> 00:43:31,486
that time and what she had been through.

1307
00:43:32,106 --> 00:43:36,266
And the person sitting next to me
now didn't just wake up evolved.

1308
00:43:36,346 --> 00:43:39,626
She did the work, she
communicated, she stayed open

1309
00:43:39,666 --> 00:43:40,965
even when it was uncomfortable.

1310
00:43:41,066 --> 00:43:44,386
We had fights and arguments about-
Mm-hmm … this sort of stuff, and

1311
00:43:44,486 --> 00:43:49,146
I think that's the part people don't
see when they look at a couple who

1312
00:43:49,246 --> 00:43:50,686
seems like they have it figured out.

1313
00:43:51,366 --> 00:43:53,786
Nobody has it figured out, I promise you.

1314
00:43:53,986 --> 00:43:54,126
Nope.

1315
00:43:54,586 --> 00:43:56,806
We're all just choosing to keep growing.

1316
00:43:57,266 --> 00:44:01,646
So if you are somewhere in your journey
right now where things feel messy or

1317
00:44:01,726 --> 00:44:06,556
uncertain or like you have more rules than
you know what to do with, that's normal.

1318
00:44:06,986 --> 00:44:08,146
Keep talking.

1319
00:44:08,246 --> 00:44:10,446
Keep being honest with
yourself and your partner.

1320
00:44:10,546 --> 00:44:15,666
You'd be amazed at who, at who you become
on the other side of that conversation.

1321
00:44:15,746 --> 00:44:15,766
Mm.

1322
00:44:16,106 --> 00:44:18,166
All right, Pris, last
question, sweetheart.

1323
00:44:18,396 --> 00:44:18,486
Okay.

1324
00:44:18,566 --> 00:44:19,766
And then we're gonna get out of here.

1325
00:44:20,266 --> 00:44:27,396
I want your, uh, current opinion
on polyamory as it applies to us.

1326
00:44:27,896 --> 00:44:28,156
Um…

1327
00:44:28,896 --> 00:44:32,956
Because everybody who, anybody- … who's
ever listened to this podcast, who's

1328
00:44:32,996 --> 00:44:35,036
ever seen any of your TikTok reels-

1329
00:44:35,196 --> 00:44:35,416
Yeah

1330
00:44:35,496 --> 00:44:36,236
…
content, whatever.

1331
00:44:36,436 --> 00:44:39,096
I am not a poly person.

1332
00:44:39,276 --> 00:44:41,936
I do not, I don't label myself as poly.

1333
00:44:42,536 --> 00:44:46,906
If, if there was a couple that wanted
to date us, if there was a… I

1334
00:44:46,966 --> 00:44:52,006
don't want Adam dating someone by
himself unless I am dating someone.

1335
00:44:52,826 --> 00:44:53,606
By yourself?

1336
00:44:53,706 --> 00:44:53,906
Yeah.

1337
00:44:54,166 --> 00:44:55,226
Like if that's- Hmm … if that's-

1338
00:44:55,326 --> 00:44:56,106
Like you want it, it, um-

1339
00:44:56,126 --> 00:44:58,026
Yeah, I want it even
… completely even Stevens.

1340
00:44:58,036 --> 00:44:58,046
Yeah.

1341
00:44:58,046 --> 00:45:00,866
So like that's, so that,
that might be out, right?

1342
00:45:00,946 --> 00:45:02,766
But we can definitely have
friends with benefits.

1343
00:45:03,346 --> 00:45:06,326
I don't really want labels
like girlfriends or boyfriends

1344
00:45:06,366 --> 00:45:06,866
or anything like- Yeah, you

1345
00:45:06,886 --> 00:45:07,606
don't like the title

1346
00:45:07,616 --> 00:45:08,056
exchange

1347
00:45:08,056 --> 00:45:09,386
I don't like to title things, like no.

1348
00:45:09,896 --> 00:45:09,906
No.

1349
00:45:09,986 --> 00:45:11,086
Um, so yeah.

1350
00:45:11,566 --> 00:45:14,676
Well now from a, from a, a you
standpoint, so you're, you're

1351
00:45:14,726 --> 00:45:18,046
talking about what you see for me.

1352
00:45:18,126 --> 00:45:19,766
But what about from you?

1353
00:45:20,006 --> 00:45:20,306
Mm-hmm.

1354
00:45:20,886 --> 00:45:26,006
Could you see yourself being
vulnerable with somebody other than me?

1355
00:45:26,146 --> 00:45:30,676
Could you be, uh, able to
express heartfelt feelings?

1356
00:45:30,886 --> 00:45:33,126
Could you trust the way you do with me?

1357
00:45:33,186 --> 00:45:36,206
Could you be- I don't- … on
that same emotional level-

1358
00:45:36,416 --> 00:45:37,166
I don't think so

1359
00:45:37,176 --> 00:45:37,906
…
with somebody else?

1360
00:45:37,986 --> 00:45:39,526
I think partly.

1361
00:45:39,566 --> 00:45:39,706
Yeah.

1362
00:45:40,286 --> 00:45:41,866
But not, not fully.

1363
00:45:41,946 --> 00:45:42,086
No?

1364
00:45:42,406 --> 00:45:42,606
No.

1365
00:45:43,106 --> 00:45:45,686
Is it, it's just a matter of, you
know, you just, you just- I don't

1366
00:45:45,696 --> 00:45:47,626
trust a lot of people … don't know
if you can trust anybody like that?

1367
00:45:47,666 --> 00:45:48,556
Yeah.

1368
00:45:48,606 --> 00:45:48,766
Yeah.

1369
00:45:48,776 --> 00:45:49,286
Yeah, that makes sense.

1370
00:45:49,316 --> 00:45:50,226
It takes a lot, yeah.

1371
00:45:50,266 --> 00:45:50,886
That makes sense.

1372
00:45:50,966 --> 00:45:51,496
Yeah.

1373
00:45:51,526 --> 00:45:56,336
Now, would you need that sort of same
level of trust for somebody that I was

1374
00:45:56,366 --> 00:45:58,146
dating in the hypothetical situation?

1375
00:45:58,366 --> 00:45:58,486
Yes.

1376
00:45:58,496 --> 00:45:58,506
Yeah?

1377
00:45:58,506 --> 00:45:59,086
Yeah.

1378
00:45:59,106 --> 00:46:00,426
Wow, that's gotta be a tough one.

1379
00:46:00,526 --> 00:46:00,676
Mm-hmm.

1380
00:46:01,086 --> 00:46:01,826
Holy shit.

1381
00:46:01,886 --> 00:46:02,266
Yeah.

1382
00:46:02,366 --> 00:46:02,466
Yeah.

1383
00:46:03,206 --> 00:46:10,346
Um, now as it sits, as we talk about
it, without labels, you're basically

1384
00:46:10,386 --> 00:46:11,426
saying that you're just open.

1385
00:46:12,026 --> 00:46:12,526
I'm just open.

1386
00:46:12,706 --> 00:46:14,146
You're just open, living life.

1387
00:46:14,866 --> 00:46:15,666
Abierta

1388
00:46:15,856 --> 00:46:16,706
.
Going from there.

1389
00:46:17,046 --> 00:46:22,076
You, you see what a year and a
half has done, uh, in talking to

1390
00:46:22,326 --> 00:46:24,936
therapists and talking to other people-

1391
00:46:25,146 --> 00:46:25,605
Guys, our

1392
00:46:25,686 --> 00:46:26,186
show helped

1393
00:46:26,366 --> 00:46:26,566
us

1394
00:46:26,835 --> 00:46:26,865
…
in the lifestyle.

1395
00:46:26,865 --> 00:46:29,706
Yeah, believe it or not,
it's, it's our own therapy.

1396
00:46:29,806 --> 00:46:31,286
So- Y'all heard the same stuff,

1397
00:46:31,486 --> 00:46:32,346
like- I mean, if you go-

1398
00:46:32,386 --> 00:46:35,246
yeah … back and listen to episode
one and then you listen to this one,

1399
00:46:35,326 --> 00:46:39,526
you're gonna hear two very, very
different- Yes … lovely ladies here.

1400
00:46:39,626 --> 00:46:43,066
Um, I, I find it interesting, and
that's why I had to revisit it.

1401
00:46:43,866 --> 00:46:46,416
Uh, now before you go, a few things.

1402
00:46:46,546 --> 00:46:50,986
If you're not already a member of SDC, the
world's largest lifestyle social network,

1403
00:46:51,086 --> 00:46:58,426
go check them out at sdc.com and use
our referral code 38236 to get started.

1404
00:46:58,486 --> 00:47:01,866
It is hands down one of the best
communities in the lifestyle, and

1405
00:47:01,926 --> 00:47:03,986
we're proud to partner with them.

1406
00:47:04,486 --> 00:47:07,306
And also, if you're in the San
Antonio area, we wanna see you.

1407
00:47:07,586 --> 00:47:11,726
Beyond Monogamy is hosting an event
at Club Eden San Antonio on June 20th.

1408
00:47:12,346 --> 00:47:15,766
If you wanna come hang out with me
and Pris that day, head over to Club

1409
00:47:15,806 --> 00:47:19,126
Eden's website, grab your membership
to the club, and come find us.

1410
00:47:19,526 --> 00:47:20,686
We always have a couch.

1411
00:47:20,776 --> 00:47:20,956
Mm-hmm.

1412
00:47:20,976 --> 00:47:22,426
And we would love to meet you in person.

1413
00:47:22,966 --> 00:47:25,886
And if you've ever been thinking
about attending a lifestyle event

1414
00:47:25,946 --> 00:47:31,146
and you've never been to Naughty
N'awlins, put it on your calendar July

1415
00:47:31,326 --> 00:47:33,586
8th through the 12th in New Orleans.

1416
00:47:34,346 --> 00:47:35,326
We will be there.

1417
00:47:35,386 --> 00:47:38,206
We will actually have a
booth, an exhibitor's table.

1418
00:47:38,286 --> 00:47:38,956
You gotta come find us.

1419
00:47:38,956 --> 00:47:38,976
We're

1420
00:47:38,976 --> 00:47:39,806
gonna have some stuff.

1421
00:47:39,826 --> 00:47:40,646
We're gonna have some stuff.

1422
00:47:40,676 --> 00:47:41,546
We're gonna have some stuff.

1423
00:47:41,586 --> 00:47:41,746
We're gonna have some giveaways.

1424
00:47:41,806 --> 00:47:42,086
Yes.

1425
00:47:42,116 --> 00:47:46,166
It's gonna be really, really cool, and
cool picture opportunities as well.

1426
00:47:46,906 --> 00:47:47,386
That's right.

1427
00:47:47,646 --> 00:47:48,506
Call me Mickey.

1428
00:47:48,566 --> 00:47:52,926
If you wanna catch us live, we are on
Full Swap Radio live every Thursday

1429
00:47:52,966 --> 00:47:54,526
at 2:00 PM and 7:00 PM Central.

1430
00:47:54,986 --> 00:47:57,446
Go to fullswapradio.com for more.

1431
00:47:57,966 --> 00:48:01,346
And hey, if you have a story, a
confession, or something that you've

1432
00:48:01,366 --> 00:48:06,416
been dying to say but don't want a
name attached to it- … we have an

1433
00:48:06,496 --> 00:48:11,276
anonymous confessional feature right
on our website at beyond-monogamy.com.

1434
00:48:11,736 --> 00:48:13,016
Drop it there.

1435
00:48:13,076 --> 00:48:15,276
We may just talk about
it on a future episode.

1436
00:48:15,616 --> 00:48:21,536
And if you wanna be a guest on the show,
head to beyond-monogamy.com/guests/intake

1437
00:48:22,216 --> 00:48:23,596
and fill out our intake form.

1438
00:48:23,636 --> 00:48:24,996
We'd love to have you.

1439
00:48:25,196 --> 00:48:25,556
Mm-hmm.

1440
00:48:25,596 --> 00:48:27,176
It's a really cool show to be on.

1441
00:48:27,216 --> 00:48:30,516
Find us everywhere, Apple
Podcasts, YouTube, Spotify, Amazon

1442
00:48:30,576 --> 00:48:34,476
Music, iHeartRadio, Pandora,
and at beyond-monogamy.com.

1443
00:48:34,916 --> 00:48:38,476
Follow us, rate us, share us with a
friend who's curious about this lifestyle

1444
00:48:38,556 --> 00:48:40,176
but doesn't know where to start.

1445
00:48:41,036 --> 00:48:43,216
You never know whose
life you might change.

1446
00:48:43,336 --> 00:48:43,696
Mm-hmm.

1447
00:48:43,756 --> 00:48:47,196
And with that, we appreciate you
all joining us for another episode,

1448
00:48:47,366 --> 00:48:49,276
and we will see you guys next week.

1449
00:48:49,616 --> 00:48:50,316
Bye.