Single Fellas in the Lifestyle: Are Single Men Really Ruining the Swinging Scene?

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Alright y'all, before we
dive in, a quick heads up.

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This show is raw, real, and
definitely not rated pg.

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We're talking about adult themes, sexual
content, and the kind of stuff you

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probably don't want blasting through your
speakers at work or around your kits.

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So grab some headphones, pour your
drink of choice and get comfy.

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Oh, and just so we're clear, we are not
licensed therapists, counselors, or sex.

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Couches.

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Sex coaches.

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Sex coaches,

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not sex couches

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or just a couple of people sharing our
lives, experiences and sexy adventures.

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An ethical non-monogamy.

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So with that, pull up a
chair and enjoy the show.

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And.

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Hello and welcome to another
episode of Beyond Monogamy.

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I'm Adam.

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And I'm pris.

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And, uh, I have to apologize
right off the bat, I am struggling

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with my voice a little bit.

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I am coming off of, uh, strep.

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Mm-hmm.

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So I'm, I'm currently
recovering from that.

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But as you know, we, uh, we don't
miss a show 'cause that's what we do.

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We're here to provide you entertainment
and plus it's our therapy.

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Um, so with that,

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oh shit.

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With that, uh, what we talking about,
you dunno, but, uh, I figured this was

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gonna be a, a fun little subject there.

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One of the first things that we dealt
with when we first came into the

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lifestyle was that I felt had a real
negative connotation was the single guy.

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Lifestyle.

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Oh,

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yeah.

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And so that's what we're
gonna be talking about.

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We're gonna be talking about.

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Yeah.

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Uh, you know, I've, I've heard a lot of
people refer to the single man in the

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lifestyle as ruining the entire lifestyle.

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Now we're gonna get into that.

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But before we do, I have something
that's bugging the hell outta

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me, and I just gotta bring it up.

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We were just talking about this.

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I've, I don't know what it is.

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This is like, it's happened so
many times and I don't know why.

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It's just bugging the hell outta
me, but I can't really, yeah.

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It, I don't know what it is.

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It's irking me today.

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Okay.

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It's irking me today.

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Okay.

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I have had a I have a lot
of women that contact me.

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They message me.

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Yeah.

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And normally the interaction
goes the same as always.

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It's a message.

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It's, Hey, how are you?

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The talk is very brief, normally in
the beginning, and it's a lot of, Hey,

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you're, um, you're a good looking guy.

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And I'm like, Hey, thanks, I appreciate
that you're not so bad looking yourself.

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And then it's like, yeah, yeah,
you know, I, I, I've seen you and

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your wife and blah, blah, blah.

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And then from there they proceed
to constantly talk about how hot

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my wife is, how beautiful my wife
is, how interested they are in you.

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And, but it, it always comes out as, yeah.

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I'd love to play with the both of y'all.

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Are you sure?

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Are you sure after that five to 10
minute tirade about how my wife is so

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hot, how she's so beautiful and how
she seems so amazing and everything

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that you hear and see and this and
that and all of this, like you went

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off on how wonderful my wife is.

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You sure you're interested in Me too.

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Like, are you just using
me to get to my wife?

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Because as soon as that
happens, that's all I think,

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and let me tell you something.

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Mm-hmm.

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I lose interest when that happens.

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Well,

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very quickly.

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How can you tell the difference when
they're just giving you a compliment

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into what is into what you think it is?

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It's not an e it's not even,
it's literally, it's nonstop.

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But how

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now?

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Lemme because

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so it would be, it'd be like you're
hot and, you know, and your wife.

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Yeah.

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It, it's not Oh, both
of y'all are so sexy.

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Y'all.

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I've that.

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Yeah.

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And I've, I, I've seen

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that too.

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I've seen And like where it's
like both of y'all are just, yeah.

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Yeah.

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I've seen that too.

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Or people,

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and some people do that.

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Mm-hmm.

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But a lot of times, a lot of
these women that reach out to me

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Go about it that way.

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They'll very briefly say, oh
yeah, you're attractive, and

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then blah, blah, blah, blah.

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Oh, you wife it, blah, blah, blah, blah.

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Yeah.

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Oh, your wife is b blah blah.

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And it.

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Yeah, I know.

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And you know, I, I agree with

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it.

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Your answer.

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Yeah.

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Your answers

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are

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always like,

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I'm like, yeah, she's amazing.

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Yeah.

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I, I agree.

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I can't I can't agree more.

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That's funny because when people
contact me that never happens.

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So I don't get that.

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No,

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they

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tell you how beautiful you,

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they tell me how be how beautiful I am.

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Yeah.

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And then they'll be like, oh,
how lucky your husband is.

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Yeah.

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And then I always turn it, I'm
like, have you seen my man?

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He's freaking hot.

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And yeah, we're a good team together.

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'cause I'm a bitch,

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you know,

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I like, I'm straight up honest.

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I bring this up because I,
I feel like people's hearts

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maybe are in the right place.

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Maybe.

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Yeah.

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Um, but there needs to be an
understanding here is that that is not

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the way to get to me,

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the way to get to her

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at all.

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And that's definitely not, you
know, if you're coming through me to

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get to her, that's not gonna work.

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It's

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not gonna happen.

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Matter of fact, it's gonna work even less.

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Yes.

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Because.

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Not only is she not gonna be
interested, but now I'm not interested.

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Yeah, because you just kind of
very made it very clear that you're

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kind of interested in me, but
it's blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

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Oh, your wife.

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Your wife.

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Yeah.

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Now I understand that this
is a woman centric lifestyle.

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Right?

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I get that.

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But if that's the case
message her, don't message me.

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As a matter of fact,

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I answer women, I answer women's messages.

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I don't answer men's messages.

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Yeah.

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So off.

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Don't waste my time.

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Don't waste my time.

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As far as I'm concerned if you're
interested in my wife and you want the

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both of us go through my wife, I'm easier.

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I am an easier target.

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If my wife says, Hey this
girl I'm interested and she's

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interested in both of us.

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You wanna play?

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Yeah, sure.

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That's cool.

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Yeah.

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But if you're gonna reach out to me.

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You're gonna do that whole thing?

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Well by the time our conversation
ends, I feel less than significant.

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Yeah.

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I feel like I'm the unattractive
ogre in this coupling.

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And you are.

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And I feel like you're just
using me to get to her, in which

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case I'm completely turned off.

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Yeah.

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And

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you can be honest.

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Like,

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you can be honest

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if you ask Adam, like,
how do I get ahold of her?

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What does she like to talk about?

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He has a script for you.

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Yeah.

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I'm not even lying to you.

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I've told, I've told men and women

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how to get

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ahold of you.

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Look, here's her cheat codes.

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This is what you gotta follow.

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They never listen.

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You listen.

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They never listen.

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They never listen.

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Yeah.

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I don't get it.

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And I'm also, Adam is
easier to get ahold of, but.

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Yeah.

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If that happens it's gonna be, you turn
me off once I know that my husband was

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like, interested and then you just,
all of a sudden, once I see that he's

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kind of gotten out of the conversation.

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Yeah.

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That's what I do.

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He will, it's gone.

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It's done.

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I remove myself from once
I feel like I am not really

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wanted, but then you lost me too.

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'cause you're not talking to my husband.

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Once I feel like I'm not really
wanted, then I'm kind of, I kind of

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push that person onto my wife and
I'm like, you guys have a good time.

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Mm-hmm.

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Enjoy your, enjoy your stay.

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Mm-hmm.

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And what I've noticed is too, like we've
had separate conversations with the same

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person as well as a group conversation.

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And if you don't respond,
then they're hitting me up.

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One.

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Yeah.

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It's like, oh, well I'm
not getting her attention.

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Let me hit him up.

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I don't think that.

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People think that there's
anything wrong with that.

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Yeah.

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No, I don't think so.

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But there is a lot wrong with that
because just the same as the whole,

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oh, well unicorns have feelings and you
should treat them like an actual person.

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Guess what?

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Married men have feelings.

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I think men, period.

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Yes.

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Have as much feelings in
the lifestyle as we do.

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And I feel sometimes they have it harder.

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And I say this because if you think
like me, I think all men are scummy.

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Yeah.

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Right.

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So the way they come at you to really
depends on how the way they come.

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Statue depends on what mood you're
in and what vibe they're giving off.

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But if you're me, they're always
giving off a scummy vibe until I get

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to talk to them a little bit more.

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Yeah.

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Um,

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yeah.

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And you know, that's a really great
segue into what our actual topic is,

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but I had to get that off my chest
because, you know, and I'm talking out

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there to every single woman who has
ever reached out to a guy, a married man

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Yeah.

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Expressing interest in the wife.

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Do do yourself a favor, skip that.

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Go

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straight

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to the

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wife.

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Like,

261
00:08:25,244 --> 00:08:26,234
go straight to the wife.

262
00:08:26,234 --> 00:08:29,174
You know, women respect women
talking to them anyways.

263
00:08:29,264 --> 00:08:29,684
Yes.

264
00:08:29,684 --> 00:08:30,314
One-on-one.

265
00:08:30,314 --> 00:08:30,794
I do.

266
00:08:31,104 --> 00:08:32,274
Don't waste the husband's time.

267
00:08:32,274 --> 00:08:32,844
Like, don't be shy.

268
00:08:32,844 --> 00:08:33,354
Don't do that.

269
00:08:33,444 --> 00:08:33,654
Yeah.

270
00:08:33,654 --> 00:08:39,144
You know, I like, I get it that I, I
seem nicer and I seem easier to talk to.

271
00:08:39,144 --> 00:08:39,714
Mm-hmm.

272
00:08:39,719 --> 00:08:41,334
Uh, but don't use me.

273
00:08:41,334 --> 00:08:41,394
Yeah.

274
00:08:41,484 --> 00:08:45,084
Because the moment I feel
like I am less wanted.

275
00:08:45,744 --> 00:08:48,174
You lost me, and if you
lost me, you lost us.

276
00:08:48,264 --> 00:08:48,984
It's just the way it is.

277
00:08:49,044 --> 00:08:49,344
Yeah.

278
00:08:49,674 --> 00:08:50,494
Uh, so yeah, because

279
00:08:50,494 --> 00:08:50,964
we are besties.

280
00:08:50,964 --> 00:08:51,534
He'll tell me.

281
00:08:51,924 --> 00:08:54,534
Uh, I'll be honest with, I'll be
honest with it, but I, it's just,

282
00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:58,404
it's obviously, it's happened so many
times throughout the years and even

283
00:08:58,404 --> 00:09:00,444
recently that I was like, okay, yeah.

284
00:09:00,994 --> 00:09:02,164
This has gotta be talked about.

285
00:09:02,164 --> 00:09:02,224
We're

286
00:09:02,224 --> 00:09:02,614
done.

287
00:09:02,764 --> 00:09:03,184
It's it,

288
00:09:03,244 --> 00:09:05,794
and I mean, I'm sure there's
lots of men that get that,

289
00:09:06,304 --> 00:09:06,724
I'm sure.

290
00:09:06,724 --> 00:09:07,324
Oh, I know that.

291
00:09:07,329 --> 00:09:07,839
There's lots of

292
00:09:07,839 --> 00:09:08,279
men that get that.

293
00:09:08,279 --> 00:09:09,394
I mean, there has to be lots of men.

294
00:09:09,514 --> 00:09:10,204
I know there is.

295
00:09:10,264 --> 00:09:11,914
You should talk about
that in your men's group.

296
00:09:12,124 --> 00:09:15,204
I brought, I've made a I'm
making a post today is men.

297
00:09:15,204 --> 00:09:15,564
Yeah.

298
00:09:16,404 --> 00:09:17,604
That has to be

299
00:09:17,604 --> 00:09:17,904
like,

300
00:09:17,909 --> 00:09:19,044
it's a, it's a pain in the ass.

301
00:09:19,049 --> 00:09:22,074
I've Is what it's, I've never been
contacted to get ahold of my husband.

302
00:09:22,074 --> 00:09:23,364
I mean, I've gotten contacted.

303
00:09:23,364 --> 00:09:23,934
Can I talk?

304
00:09:23,934 --> 00:09:25,344
Can I message your husband?

305
00:09:26,154 --> 00:09:26,679
I'm like, sure.

306
00:09:26,699 --> 00:09:26,919
But

307
00:09:26,919 --> 00:09:28,314
you never got that message, which is,

308
00:09:28,314 --> 00:09:28,644
I've never,

309
00:09:28,644 --> 00:09:32,064
Hey, I think you're really pretty,
but Oh my God, your husband

310
00:09:32,069 --> 00:09:32,199
Yeah.

311
00:09:32,364 --> 00:09:35,274
Is the hottest person I have
ever met in this lifestyle.

312
00:09:35,304 --> 00:09:35,364
Yeah.

313
00:09:35,454 --> 00:09:37,284
And oh my gosh, you are
so lucky to have him.

314
00:09:37,704 --> 00:09:40,854
If a woman messaged you and said,
oh my gosh, your husband is so hot.

315
00:09:40,854 --> 00:09:41,664
You are so lucky.

316
00:09:42,309 --> 00:09:43,209
What would you say to that?

317
00:09:43,419 --> 00:09:44,619
I'd be like, I agree.

318
00:09:44,859 --> 00:09:45,369
Thank you.

319
00:09:45,414 --> 00:09:46,274
And that would be the end of it.

320
00:09:46,274 --> 00:09:46,419
And that would be the end of it.

321
00:09:47,289 --> 00:09:51,249
Because telling people you're
so lucky to have that person

322
00:09:51,489 --> 00:09:54,459
diminishes their own internal value.

323
00:09:54,489 --> 00:09:54,789
Yes.

324
00:09:55,719 --> 00:09:56,354
Most of the people,

325
00:09:56,354 --> 00:09:58,299
that is one thing he and
I have always agreed on.

326
00:09:58,299 --> 00:09:58,659
Yeah.

327
00:09:58,659 --> 00:09:59,469
When we're dating.

328
00:09:59,469 --> 00:09:59,679
Yeah.

329
00:09:59,679 --> 00:10:02,319
You know, people think that it's
a, it's a fucking compliment.

330
00:10:02,319 --> 00:10:03,609
It is not a compliment.

331
00:10:03,614 --> 00:10:03,634
No.

332
00:10:03,969 --> 00:10:08,649
You telling a sp somebody's
spouse, Hey, you are one lucky guy.

333
00:10:08,739 --> 00:10:08,919
Yeah.

334
00:10:08,919 --> 00:10:10,269
Because she's incredible.

335
00:10:10,839 --> 00:10:11,409
Hey, fuck you.

336
00:10:11,409 --> 00:10:11,499
It's

337
00:10:11,499 --> 00:10:11,589
diff

338
00:10:12,159 --> 00:10:12,489
about that

339
00:10:12,519 --> 00:10:13,689
when you're telling me,

340
00:10:13,929 --> 00:10:14,139
yeah.

341
00:10:14,139 --> 00:10:15,789
Oh, he's a lucky guy.

342
00:10:16,359 --> 00:10:17,379
That's a different,

343
00:10:17,439 --> 00:10:17,829
yeah, that's

344
00:10:17,829 --> 00:10:18,039
different.

345
00:10:18,039 --> 00:10:20,439
But for you, different, you know,
I've been told that by guys.

346
00:10:20,469 --> 00:10:20,649
Oh

347
00:10:20,649 --> 00:10:22,239
baby, I've been told that by women.

348
00:10:22,239 --> 00:10:22,249
I,

349
00:10:22,269 --> 00:10:22,509
I

350
00:10:22,509 --> 00:10:22,569
know.

351
00:10:22,569 --> 00:10:24,999
Like, they'll just straight up and
they, they think it's a comp, they

352
00:10:24,999 --> 00:10:26,229
think it's an innocent compliment.

353
00:10:26,229 --> 00:10:26,754
You know what it does?

354
00:10:26,754 --> 00:10:27,069
It does.

355
00:10:27,369 --> 00:10:32,499
It takes a person who already doesn't
think that they are attractive and it

356
00:10:32,499 --> 00:10:36,249
makes them feel less attractive and.

357
00:10:36,639 --> 00:10:39,669
Maybe there's some guys out there that
don't think twice about it, but you know

358
00:10:39,669 --> 00:10:42,639
what, this guy thinks twice about it,
and I guarantee you I'm not the only one.

359
00:10:42,789 --> 00:10:43,029
Yeah.

360
00:10:43,109 --> 00:10:47,399
And I hate, I hate to be so, so plain
cut and dry about it, but I don't know, I

361
00:10:47,399 --> 00:10:49,079
feel kind of spurned about it, you know?

362
00:10:49,079 --> 00:10:49,414
I mean, I don't like it.

363
00:10:49,534 --> 00:10:49,654
I

364
00:10:49,654 --> 00:10:51,299
mean, hey, this is our platform.

365
00:10:51,299 --> 00:10:52,019
It's our platform.

366
00:10:52,024 --> 00:10:52,294
That's what

367
00:10:52,294 --> 00:10:52,414
we have.

368
00:10:52,414 --> 00:10:53,414
You can talk about whatever you want.

369
00:10:53,549 --> 00:10:54,029
That's right.

370
00:10:54,029 --> 00:10:54,539
That's right.

371
00:10:54,819 --> 00:10:59,989
But, you know, I think that goes into, uh,
into our main topic, uh, which like I said

372
00:10:59,989 --> 00:11:03,479
is, is about single guys in the lifestyle.

373
00:11:03,839 --> 00:11:08,269
Now, you had mentioned that
you think that maybe men have

374
00:11:08,269 --> 00:11:10,009
it harder in this lifestyle.

375
00:11:10,009 --> 00:11:10,549
Yeah.

376
00:11:10,849 --> 00:11:16,699
And I feel like, and I've always said
this, uh, even though I've never been

377
00:11:16,909 --> 00:11:21,079
a single guy in this lifestyle I think
single guys have it really difficult

378
00:11:21,179 --> 00:11:21,989
In this lifestyle.

379
00:11:22,079 --> 00:11:22,409
They do.

380
00:11:22,439 --> 00:11:24,479
And, uh, I, I think.

381
00:11:24,979 --> 00:11:28,129
I know that from when we first went in

382
00:11:28,309 --> 00:11:28,759
Yeah.

383
00:11:28,819 --> 00:11:31,459
One, when we first went
into the lifestyle,

384
00:11:31,484 --> 00:11:31,704
we

385
00:11:31,704 --> 00:11:31,864
got,

386
00:11:31,869 --> 00:11:35,479
we already had this preconceived notion

387
00:11:35,689 --> 00:11:36,049
Yeah.

388
00:11:36,139 --> 00:11:38,719
That single guys were shitty.

389
00:11:38,839 --> 00:11:39,199
Yeah.

390
00:11:39,919 --> 00:11:40,489
We did.

391
00:11:40,489 --> 00:11:43,729
Just automatically, we hadn't dealt
with any of 'em, but we automatically

392
00:11:43,729 --> 00:11:46,729
had this thing in her head that
guys are gonna be hitting you up.

393
00:11:46,729 --> 00:11:49,669
And they're, and they're just,
they're just shitty be and primarily

394
00:11:49,669 --> 00:11:51,319
because of the vanilla life.

395
00:11:51,499 --> 00:11:52,759
Of the vanilla life.

396
00:11:52,764 --> 00:11:52,864
Of course.

397
00:11:52,864 --> 00:11:53,024
Yeah.

398
00:11:53,324 --> 00:11:56,509
A lot of single guys are
shitty in, in the vanilla life.

399
00:11:56,869 --> 00:11:58,219
Hence why I say that

400
00:11:58,224 --> 00:11:58,454
all the time.

401
00:11:58,454 --> 00:11:58,489
Yeah.

402
00:11:58,789 --> 00:12:00,529
'cause there's not a whole
lot of boundaries that are,

403
00:12:00,709 --> 00:12:02,149
that, that are thrown around.

404
00:12:02,509 --> 00:12:04,279
Uh, women are less vocal Yeah.

405
00:12:04,459 --> 00:12:08,709
In the vanilla lifestyle than in
the, in the swinging lifestyle.

406
00:12:08,769 --> 00:12:09,009
Yeah.

407
00:12:09,469 --> 00:12:13,489
So to me, I, I if you could
look back on that time.

408
00:12:13,989 --> 00:12:17,229
Because I know that you don't, you
don't like men for the most part.

409
00:12:18,039 --> 00:12:18,969
You like some, but

410
00:12:18,969 --> 00:12:20,619
it, I I don't,

411
00:12:21,489 --> 00:12:27,239
so I, before you even answer that, I
would like for you to expand on the,

412
00:12:27,329 --> 00:12:29,969
on 'cause you don't hate all men.

413
00:12:29,969 --> 00:12:31,739
That's not, that's not
a fair thing to say.

414
00:12:31,739 --> 00:12:32,009
Correct.

415
00:12:32,369 --> 00:12:37,969
But you definitely don't prefer men
for some very particular reasons.

416
00:12:37,969 --> 00:12:39,259
What are those reasons?

417
00:12:39,739 --> 00:12:43,819
I feel like a lot of men
are, they don't listen.

418
00:12:44,059 --> 00:12:45,109
Men don't listen.

419
00:12:45,469 --> 00:12:50,149
Um, and, and, and women don't either, but
I'm saying in this conversation, yeah.

420
00:12:50,239 --> 00:12:52,939
Men, a lot of men that I
have been with don't listen.

421
00:12:53,269 --> 00:12:55,819
Like, I always feel like I'm on guard now.

422
00:12:55,819 --> 00:13:00,879
I'm always on guard anyway as a
woman, a lifestyle or not lifestyle,

423
00:13:00,879 --> 00:13:05,199
regular life or not, I'm always on
guard and I feel like men are just.

424
00:13:05,699 --> 00:13:06,569
Shy steer.

425
00:13:07,379 --> 00:13:07,649
Yeah.

426
00:13:07,949 --> 00:13:08,249
Yeah.

427
00:13:08,339 --> 00:13:09,539
Like I know.

428
00:13:09,569 --> 00:13:13,799
Lifestyle can be transactional and
honesty will get you in my pants

429
00:13:13,829 --> 00:13:16,139
faster than you not being honest.

430
00:13:16,719 --> 00:13:20,499
If you were to straight up tell me,
Hey Pris, if I already knew you and

431
00:13:20,499 --> 00:13:24,309
we were already like, we've met at the
club, or we met at a meet and greet,

432
00:13:24,309 --> 00:13:29,979
or you've casually messaged me or d you
know, something, some kind of already

433
00:13:29,979 --> 00:13:33,399
conversation and you'd be like, Hey
Pris, are you interested in kind of like

434
00:13:33,429 --> 00:13:35,819
playing with me gives you brownie points?

435
00:13:36,239 --> 00:13:36,479
Yeah.

436
00:13:36,579 --> 00:13:37,419
I'm gonna say yes or no.

437
00:13:37,419 --> 00:13:37,719
Right?

438
00:13:37,719 --> 00:13:40,919
But either way, that kind
of man I know is Anish.

439
00:13:41,099 --> 00:13:41,759
Shati man.

440
00:13:42,259 --> 00:13:42,739
Scummy.

441
00:13:42,739 --> 00:13:44,089
I don't, I feel like

442
00:13:44,959 --> 00:13:46,759
so Well, so throughout the years,

443
00:13:46,819 --> 00:13:46,909
you,

444
00:13:46,909 --> 00:13:49,639
here's, here's what we've dealt
with throughout the years as far

445
00:13:49,639 --> 00:13:50,839
as single men in the lifestyle.

446
00:13:51,079 --> 00:13:53,359
Now I'm not saying, but you
said something, I'm not labeling

447
00:13:53,359 --> 00:13:56,929
a all the single men, but our
experiences that led us to believe

448
00:13:57,229 --> 00:13:58,369
that single men were problems.

449
00:13:58,369 --> 00:13:58,579
Yes.

450
00:13:59,209 --> 00:14:00,319
Here's what we've come up with.

451
00:14:01,099 --> 00:14:04,969
One of the first experiences that
we had with a single man, one guy

452
00:14:04,969 --> 00:14:06,949
was messaging my wife nonstop.

453
00:14:07,399 --> 00:14:07,489
Mm-hmm.

454
00:14:07,729 --> 00:14:09,559
And being very alpha.

455
00:14:10,129 --> 00:14:10,219
Mm-hmm.

456
00:14:10,459 --> 00:14:13,279
Being very, I can fuck you
better than your husband.

457
00:14:13,579 --> 00:14:15,359
And when you, when you taste this dick.

458
00:14:16,159 --> 00:14:17,959
You're never gonna want to
go back to your husband.

459
00:14:17,989 --> 00:14:18,289
Oh yeah.

460
00:14:18,289 --> 00:14:20,869
Shit like that is disrespectful.

461
00:14:21,079 --> 00:14:24,079
And maybe some couples like
it, maybe some women like it.

462
00:14:24,079 --> 00:14:25,819
That's a very cut, cold type thing.

463
00:14:25,824 --> 00:14:26,114
Yeah.

464
00:14:26,114 --> 00:14:26,514
That's

465
00:14:26,514 --> 00:14:26,834
not my thing.

466
00:14:26,834 --> 00:14:28,309
And that's, that's some people's thing.

467
00:14:28,719 --> 00:14:32,019
But to assume that and just
lead in right out of the gate

468
00:14:32,119 --> 00:14:34,579
Sorry bra, but that
alpha shit's got to go.

469
00:14:34,579 --> 00:14:34,639
Yeah.

470
00:14:34,909 --> 00:14:36,769
So we've run into a lot of that.

471
00:14:37,189 --> 00:14:37,489
Yes.

472
00:14:37,549 --> 00:14:41,929
That has already given that air of label.

473
00:14:42,019 --> 00:14:42,289
Yeah.

474
00:14:42,319 --> 00:14:42,679
Right.

475
00:14:43,099 --> 00:14:47,409
Uh, another thing that we
run into are guys that try to

476
00:14:47,439 --> 00:14:49,089
pretend not to use a condom.

477
00:14:49,719 --> 00:14:51,969
They try to be on the sly about things.

478
00:14:51,969 --> 00:14:54,789
They try to convince you,
oh, well, we don't need to.

479
00:14:54,789 --> 00:14:56,199
I can't really use a condom.

480
00:14:56,199 --> 00:14:56,799
I'm sorry.

481
00:14:56,799 --> 00:14:58,689
Get I'm my dick's already out.

482
00:14:58,689 --> 00:15:00,009
I mean, we can already do this, you know?

483
00:15:00,129 --> 00:15:00,369
Yeah.

484
00:15:01,179 --> 00:15:01,899
Unethical.

485
00:15:02,079 --> 00:15:02,289
Mm-hmm.

486
00:15:02,564 --> 00:15:04,029
My, my guy unethical.

487
00:15:04,119 --> 00:15:04,479
Mm-hmm.

488
00:15:04,719 --> 00:15:05,499
Uh, not cool.

489
00:15:05,529 --> 00:15:07,569
And that's, those are
experiences that we've had.

490
00:15:07,809 --> 00:15:12,669
We've had guys from couples
that we've talked to.

491
00:15:13,209 --> 00:15:16,269
Who have reached out to Pris on the sly.

492
00:15:16,509 --> 00:15:20,379
Trying to Getty her to
play without me knowing.

493
00:15:20,739 --> 00:15:21,009
Mm-hmm.

494
00:15:21,509 --> 00:15:22,014
Shyte, uh, shyte.

495
00:15:22,379 --> 00:15:26,369
And then of course you hear stories about,
uh, sexual assault and things like that.

496
00:15:26,419 --> 00:15:27,439
In and out of the lifestyle.

497
00:15:27,439 --> 00:15:27,799
Exactly.

498
00:15:27,804 --> 00:15:33,804
I, most men are stronger than
women, so it's, it, it is a thing.

499
00:15:33,804 --> 00:15:35,424
I mean, I could take down a guy.

500
00:15:35,504 --> 00:15:39,079
I don't care how big you
are, but other women can't.

501
00:15:39,559 --> 00:15:39,739
Yeah.

502
00:15:39,799 --> 00:15:43,519
You know, so I feel like that's
why we're always on our on guard.

503
00:15:44,279 --> 00:15:45,599
I'm listing all of that.

504
00:15:45,599 --> 00:15:46,079
Mm-hmm.

505
00:15:46,354 --> 00:15:48,689
And, and understand
fellows who are listening.

506
00:15:49,049 --> 00:15:55,139
I'm listing all of that because that
is what helped us automatically assume

507
00:15:55,469 --> 00:15:59,109
That every guy who is single
in this lifestyle is like that.

508
00:15:59,609 --> 00:16:03,089
One bad apple, or in this
case, 10 bad apples, spoiled a

509
00:16:03,089 --> 00:16:05,609
bunch and labeled a full group.

510
00:16:05,639 --> 00:16:05,699
Yeah.

511
00:16:05,699 --> 00:16:08,659
Now we know now that is not fair.

512
00:16:09,109 --> 00:16:11,819
We know now that does not apply

513
00:16:11,819 --> 00:16:12,089
to

514
00:16:12,094 --> 00:16:14,304
often to all single men mm-hmm.

515
00:16:14,384 --> 00:16:15,569
In the lifestyle.

516
00:16:15,599 --> 00:16:15,689
Mm-hmm.

517
00:16:15,939 --> 00:16:21,309
As a matter of fact over the years,
because that was our experiences early on.

518
00:16:21,549 --> 00:16:21,639
Yeah.

519
00:16:21,639 --> 00:16:25,089
But over the years, we've noticed
that a lot of our problems with

520
00:16:25,089 --> 00:16:27,519
men arrive from married men.

521
00:16:27,599 --> 00:16:29,154
As opposed to single men.

522
00:16:29,154 --> 00:16:29,514
Mm-hmm.

523
00:16:29,729 --> 00:16:34,849
I would rather play with a
single man than a married man.

524
00:16:34,909 --> 00:16:35,869
Now explain to me why,

525
00:16:36,169 --> 00:16:39,319
Married men are the slyer ones.

526
00:16:39,319 --> 00:16:44,839
They are the ones that want to DM you
on the side without their woman knowing,

527
00:16:44,869 --> 00:16:47,029
and then all drama breaks loose.

528
00:16:47,109 --> 00:16:49,119
And I have to really explain
to these people that I really

529
00:16:49,119 --> 00:16:51,189
don't want your man, so that.

530
00:16:51,609 --> 00:16:54,099
Single men know better.

531
00:16:54,099 --> 00:16:57,699
Like they, the ones I talk to,
know not to cross that line.

532
00:16:58,359 --> 00:17:03,509
So I feel like single men J yeah, they
just don't get the, they're better at

533
00:17:03,509 --> 00:17:08,549
communicating if you tell 'em straight
up, like I can tell them straight up,

534
00:17:09,059 --> 00:17:10,889
Hey, I don't like to get fingered.

535
00:17:11,459 --> 00:17:14,159
Um, when we have sex, like,
I don't mind you kissing me.

536
00:17:14,249 --> 00:17:17,249
I'm not really a long
kisser, like, let me breathe.

537
00:17:17,739 --> 00:17:19,329
Don't suck on my tits too hard.

538
00:17:19,329 --> 00:17:24,789
Like, I can tell them every single
thing I can tell a married guy the

539
00:17:24,789 --> 00:17:27,089
same thing and he still won't listen.

540
00:17:27,629 --> 00:17:28,109
Yeah.

541
00:17:28,109 --> 00:17:32,499
There's, there seems to be a, a major dis
disconnect when it comes to married men.

542
00:17:32,499 --> 00:17:32,559
Yeah.

543
00:17:32,559 --> 00:17:33,189
And I, I just.

544
00:17:33,849 --> 00:17:35,379
It's not all married men, obviously.

545
00:17:35,379 --> 00:17:36,849
No, because you're not like that.

546
00:17:36,849 --> 00:17:37,089
I'm not like,

547
00:17:37,094 --> 00:17:37,849
you're very, I'm there.

548
00:17:38,169 --> 00:17:39,294
I think you have men,

549
00:17:39,294 --> 00:17:39,809
but you're a great listener.

550
00:17:39,954 --> 00:17:41,334
You have men who are respectful.

551
00:17:41,389 --> 00:17:42,949
And you have men who are not respectful.

552
00:17:43,099 --> 00:17:46,759
And I think that lumping 'em up
into either single or married

553
00:17:47,299 --> 00:17:49,279
is the wrong kind of lumping up.

554
00:17:49,639 --> 00:17:53,364
You should lump them up between
between respectful and disrespectful.

555
00:17:53,424 --> 00:17:53,664
Yeah.

556
00:17:53,719 --> 00:17:54,169
You know what?

557
00:17:54,169 --> 00:17:55,159
I do see a lot of,

558
00:17:55,219 --> 00:17:55,549
what's that?

559
00:17:56,179 --> 00:18:03,399
I see a lot of single men getting blamed
for trying to be the sli of them all.

560
00:18:03,899 --> 00:18:06,389
Or like when a couple is
like, say you and I Right.

561
00:18:06,389 --> 00:18:06,929
We're together.

562
00:18:07,109 --> 00:18:07,199
Yeah.

563
00:18:07,349 --> 00:18:11,039
And you tell me, Hey, no, you can
only, you can't be with any men.

564
00:18:11,069 --> 00:18:11,969
You can only be with women.

565
00:18:12,469 --> 00:18:13,249
Stuff like that.

566
00:18:13,254 --> 00:18:13,474
Yeah.

567
00:18:13,474 --> 00:18:13,484
I

568
00:18:13,669 --> 00:18:18,169
feel like those married men are
very insecure about the single guy.

569
00:18:19,159 --> 00:18:19,759
You think so?

570
00:18:19,819 --> 00:18:20,749
Oh God, yes.

571
00:18:20,749 --> 00:18:20,989
Yeah.

572
00:18:21,319 --> 00:18:21,559
Yeah.

573
00:18:21,739 --> 00:18:24,379
Oh, you can have a single woman,
but you can't have a single guy.

574
00:18:24,409 --> 00:18:28,699
Oh, you can't have, it's like the one
penis policy O it's like gimme a break.

575
00:18:28,879 --> 00:18:29,179
Yeah.

576
00:18:29,239 --> 00:18:30,019
Like seriously,

577
00:18:30,019 --> 00:18:31,609
it's, and it's all insecurity.

578
00:18:31,924 --> 00:18:32,214
It's,

579
00:18:32,219 --> 00:18:33,499
it's all insecurity.

580
00:18:33,799 --> 00:18:36,859
One of the things that I
love about this lifestyle is

581
00:18:36,859 --> 00:18:38,449
watching you with somebody else.

582
00:18:38,479 --> 00:18:41,954
And somebody I was talking to somebody
about this the other day and they were

583
00:18:41,954 --> 00:18:47,414
like, oh, yeah, well, you know, I,
I like for everybody to be involved

584
00:18:47,414 --> 00:18:49,094
sexually when it's a full swap.

585
00:18:49,124 --> 00:18:49,214
Mm-hmm.

586
00:18:49,454 --> 00:18:50,049
And I said, yeah, I dig that.

587
00:18:50,049 --> 00:18:50,329
Mm-hmm.

588
00:18:50,594 --> 00:18:52,424
But there are times where I pull back

589
00:18:52,524 --> 00:18:53,364
And I'll just watch.

590
00:18:53,369 --> 00:18:53,399
Mm-hmm.

591
00:18:53,484 --> 00:18:55,164
The three of everybody get down.

592
00:18:55,344 --> 00:18:59,274
Because one of the things
that I like is watching you be

593
00:18:59,274 --> 00:19:00,684
appreciated by everybody else.

594
00:19:00,744 --> 00:19:00,804
Yeah.

595
00:19:00,804 --> 00:19:01,764
Like, I know what I have.

596
00:19:01,884 --> 00:19:02,064
Yeah.

597
00:19:02,064 --> 00:19:02,844
I know.

598
00:19:02,899 --> 00:19:06,194
If you go back to the beginning of the
show, I'm very much aware that I am

599
00:19:06,194 --> 00:19:08,174
married to a very beautiful, very hot.

600
00:19:08,624 --> 00:19:12,734
Very amazing woman, and I'm glad that
I'm not the only one who sees it.

601
00:19:12,734 --> 00:19:15,044
And I, I can get off to that actually.

602
00:19:15,044 --> 00:19:15,104
Yeah.

603
00:19:15,604 --> 00:19:19,354
And so bringing in single guys when
it, when it's done correctly Yeah.

604
00:19:19,594 --> 00:19:23,284
Bringing in single guys, if
they're respectful, Uhhuh and they

605
00:19:23,284 --> 00:19:26,254
understand that we are a unit mm-hmm.

606
00:19:26,254 --> 00:19:29,494
And there's no breaking us up and,
and they show respect to me and

607
00:19:29,494 --> 00:19:33,274
they acknowledge me as much as
they do my wife, that's golden.

608
00:19:33,514 --> 00:19:39,439
Um, and we have met several single
men who are overly respectful.

609
00:19:39,649 --> 00:19:40,039
Oh yeah.

610
00:19:40,069 --> 00:19:41,239
Very patient.

611
00:19:41,269 --> 00:19:41,509
Yeah.

612
00:19:41,749 --> 00:19:46,369
And those guys have always been at
the top of our list when it comes to,

613
00:19:46,789 --> 00:19:48,379
uh, playing with, with single men.

614
00:19:48,384 --> 00:19:48,534
Mm-hmm.

615
00:19:48,614 --> 00:19:52,349
Or bringing single men in or even if I
if you decide you wanna play by yourself,

616
00:19:53,069 --> 00:19:54,449
those are the people that I trust.

617
00:19:54,479 --> 00:19:54,569
Mm-hmm.

618
00:19:54,614 --> 00:19:55,014
Mm-hmm.

619
00:19:55,099 --> 00:19:58,139
Those are the people that I
know you will be safe with.

620
00:19:58,139 --> 00:19:58,229
Yes.

621
00:19:58,799 --> 00:20:02,729
And that's the thing is, as a man in the
lifestyle that's the difficulty that we

622
00:20:02,729 --> 00:20:06,389
have, is that we have to, we have to give.

623
00:20:06,944 --> 00:20:10,064
That feeling of safety to women?

624
00:20:10,124 --> 00:20:10,634
Yes.

625
00:20:10,814 --> 00:20:11,234
Okay.

626
00:20:11,534 --> 00:20:11,684
Oh yeah.

627
00:20:11,684 --> 00:20:14,804
And, and whether you're single, whether
you're married, it doesn't matter as

628
00:20:14,804 --> 00:20:21,784
a man, if you aren't able to provide
safe feelings, a safe environment, if

629
00:20:21,784 --> 00:20:23,379
they don't feel safe with you mm-hmm.

630
00:20:23,769 --> 00:20:29,824
They will not even get you close to
any kind of sexual contact at all.

631
00:20:29,944 --> 00:20:30,064
Mm-hmm.

632
00:20:30,334 --> 00:20:34,594
Uh, that's just the way it's now, we
don't have that problem with women.

633
00:20:35,464 --> 00:20:38,644
I've never had to worry
about, oh, is this woman safe?

634
00:20:39,094 --> 00:20:40,444
I feel like this woman's very unsafe.

635
00:20:40,444 --> 00:20:41,464
I don't feel comfortable here.

636
00:20:41,704 --> 00:20:45,424
No it's very, you know, it, it,
it's just completely different.

637
00:20:45,514 --> 00:20:45,604
Mm-hmm.

638
00:20:46,154 --> 00:20:48,584
Those are the, the issues that we have.

639
00:20:49,094 --> 00:20:54,674
Women have to worry about men and if
they decide they want to be violent

640
00:20:54,674 --> 00:20:57,464
or if they decide they're gonna
sexually assault someone or whatever,

641
00:20:57,764 --> 00:21:00,014
and that is a very real worry.

642
00:21:00,074 --> 00:21:00,404
Yeah.

643
00:21:00,674 --> 00:21:02,954
But men have to deal with the fact that.

644
00:21:03,344 --> 00:21:05,264
We have to prove that we're safe.

645
00:21:05,384 --> 00:21:05,684
Yeah.

646
00:21:06,194 --> 00:21:07,724
And how do you do that?

647
00:21:08,354 --> 00:21:09,884
How does somebody prove
that they're safe to you?

648
00:21:10,174 --> 00:21:11,824
As a couple or as a single person

649
00:21:11,884 --> 00:21:12,184
either.

650
00:21:12,484 --> 00:21:12,814
Okay.

651
00:21:12,814 --> 00:21:15,814
So as a single person, I, I
like to meet them with you.

652
00:21:15,819 --> 00:21:16,089
Yeah.

653
00:21:16,384 --> 00:21:17,794
And I will get a vibe.

654
00:21:18,064 --> 00:21:19,864
I'll get a vibe even in conversation.

655
00:21:19,864 --> 00:21:20,524
I'll get a vibe

656
00:21:20,799 --> 00:21:24,299
And, but outside of vibes, because
not everybody's with the vibe.

657
00:21:24,479 --> 00:21:24,599
Yeah.

658
00:21:24,599 --> 00:21:25,829
What, what are some red flags?

659
00:21:25,829 --> 00:21:29,099
Um, and what are some green flags
that, that catch your attention,

660
00:21:29,099 --> 00:21:31,139
that tell you, okay, I can go
this way, or I can go that way?

661
00:21:31,589 --> 00:21:33,209
The conversation beforehand.

662
00:21:33,239 --> 00:21:33,449
Yeah,

663
00:21:33,509 --> 00:21:34,109
the talk.

664
00:21:34,109 --> 00:21:37,719
So if the talk is just simple, it's
just, if I ask 'em how long they've

665
00:21:37,719 --> 00:21:40,569
been in the lifestyle what do they like?

666
00:21:41,069 --> 00:21:43,529
Have they been out with other
people in the lifestyle?

667
00:21:43,529 --> 00:21:46,099
I don't need names, I just
wanna know, stuff like that.

668
00:21:46,099 --> 00:21:46,159
Yeah.

669
00:21:46,239 --> 00:21:48,489
If they call themselves a bull.

670
00:21:49,329 --> 00:21:50,049
They're out

671
00:21:50,439 --> 00:21:51,099
immediately.

672
00:21:51,189 --> 00:21:51,279
Huh?

673
00:21:51,399 --> 00:21:53,469
If they say, oh, I'm just a bull.

674
00:21:53,769 --> 00:21:56,559
Nah, because that's, that's
somebody who just wants to plow and

675
00:21:56,609 --> 00:21:56,879
yeah.

676
00:21:56,879 --> 00:21:57,449
You know, we, I

677
00:21:57,449 --> 00:21:58,409
am not a field.

678
00:21:58,799 --> 00:22:04,119
So a lot of those men that we listed at
the beginning, that gave us this idea

679
00:22:04,659 --> 00:22:07,449
of shitty single men in the lifestyle.

680
00:22:07,569 --> 00:22:09,309
They've always labeled
themselves as bulls.

681
00:22:09,429 --> 00:22:14,509
Bulls is not being a bull, is
a i, I call it my red flag.

682
00:22:14,509 --> 00:22:16,579
If you call yourself a
bull, you're my red flag.

683
00:22:16,879 --> 00:22:19,939
You are somebody I won't play with
and I won't play with you because

684
00:22:20,439 --> 00:22:28,499
the sex behind it is just very aggressive,
pornographic, fucking not my thing.

685
00:22:28,999 --> 00:22:32,779
Like I, when I'm with a man, I don't
care what man it is when I'm with

686
00:22:32,779 --> 00:22:36,709
a man, if my man is nearby, I'm
watching him while you're fucking me.

687
00:22:36,889 --> 00:22:38,539
I am not paying attention to you.

688
00:22:39,484 --> 00:22:40,624
I'm watching you.

689
00:22:40,699 --> 00:22:40,989
Yeah.

690
00:22:41,009 --> 00:22:43,954
And like they'll be in my face and they'll
be like, oh, you like watching him?

691
00:22:43,954 --> 00:22:44,709
And I'll be like, Uhhuh.

692
00:22:45,209 --> 00:22:45,569
Yeah.

693
00:22:45,899 --> 00:22:46,079
Yeah.

694
00:22:46,079 --> 00:22:46,109
I

695
00:22:46,364 --> 00:22:46,524
get it.

696
00:22:46,524 --> 00:22:52,279
Like I'm not a, I'm not a passionate
woman to have sex with when it

697
00:22:52,279 --> 00:22:53,149
comes to having sex with men.

698
00:22:53,719 --> 00:22:55,939
Like I can make it fun
and I can make it sexy.

699
00:22:56,839 --> 00:22:56,949
You put on a good show.

700
00:22:56,949 --> 00:22:56,984
I'll say that.

701
00:22:57,079 --> 00:23:02,519
I could put on a good show, but I'm not
I'm not like, Ooh, get all, nah, I'm

702
00:23:02,519 --> 00:23:04,639
not a passionate like, check my face.

703
00:23:04,639 --> 00:23:06,129
Nah, not my thing.

704
00:23:06,429 --> 00:23:06,609
So

705
00:23:06,609 --> 00:23:06,849
Yeah.

706
00:23:06,849 --> 00:23:07,719
You know, IIII

707
00:23:07,719 --> 00:23:08,769
don't know why I ranted into that.

708
00:23:08,774 --> 00:23:08,894
Sorry.

709
00:23:09,094 --> 00:23:14,679
I don't, I well, I don't understand is, I
understand the label of bull when it comes

710
00:23:14,679 --> 00:23:16,094
to couple Yeah, that's what it's couples.

711
00:23:16,394 --> 00:23:16,614
Yes.

712
00:23:16,844 --> 00:23:18,614
Coupled couples look for bulls.

713
00:23:18,669 --> 00:23:18,999
Yeah.

714
00:23:19,059 --> 00:23:20,949
That's exactly what they're looking for.

715
00:23:21,189 --> 00:23:21,369
And

716
00:23:21,369 --> 00:23:22,479
hot wife, right?

717
00:23:22,479 --> 00:23:22,869
They're not necessarily Yeah.

718
00:23:23,019 --> 00:23:24,819
Well, hot wife, not so much.

719
00:23:24,879 --> 00:23:25,269
Okay.

720
00:23:25,359 --> 00:23:27,099
Because it's hot.

721
00:23:27,099 --> 00:23:28,089
Wife can be single.

722
00:23:28,089 --> 00:23:28,299
Ben.

723
00:23:29,004 --> 00:23:34,914
But bull specifically is
providing more of the aggressive

724
00:23:34,974 --> 00:23:35,154
Yeah.

725
00:23:35,574 --> 00:23:36,714
Humiliation.

726
00:23:36,714 --> 00:23:36,774
Yeah.

727
00:23:36,804 --> 00:23:38,934
And degradation aspect of it.

728
00:23:38,934 --> 00:23:38,994
Yeah.

729
00:23:38,994 --> 00:23:40,134
That's what makes the bull.

730
00:23:40,224 --> 00:23:40,464
Yeah.

731
00:23:40,524 --> 00:23:44,994
The bull is for the couple, the cup
holds couple and they're all for it, man.

732
00:23:45,324 --> 00:23:48,414
And if you want to take that alpha
energy into that bedroom, then by

733
00:23:48,414 --> 00:23:49,944
all means they're looking for you.

734
00:23:49,944 --> 00:23:50,304
Mm-hmm.

735
00:23:50,329 --> 00:23:55,734
But that doesn't apply to anywhere else
in the lifestyle unless they've told you.

736
00:23:55,914 --> 00:23:56,214
Yeah.

737
00:23:56,334 --> 00:23:57,684
So really why?

738
00:23:58,164 --> 00:24:00,474
Why lead in with that title of bull?

739
00:24:00,534 --> 00:24:01,824
I mean, they think, just
say you're a single dude.

740
00:24:01,824 --> 00:24:06,444
They think, they think it's, I think
they, that bull means you have a big dick.

741
00:24:06,954 --> 00:24:07,524
Is that what you

742
00:24:07,524 --> 00:24:07,674
think?

743
00:24:07,674 --> 00:24:08,509
I do Really?

744
00:24:08,709 --> 00:24:10,824
'cause that's whatever I get
whenever it's like such a bull.

745
00:24:10,824 --> 00:24:11,694
And it's like this big guy.

746
00:24:11,934 --> 00:24:12,504
This guy with big, I'll

747
00:24:12,504 --> 00:24:14,514
tell you, we've had bulls over.

748
00:24:14,514 --> 00:24:14,574
Yeah.

749
00:24:14,574 --> 00:24:14,874
Our first one

750
00:24:15,264 --> 00:24:17,754
was a bull, has not been the case.

751
00:24:17,814 --> 00:24:19,644
Our first one was a bull
and he was Willie lump.

752
00:24:19,644 --> 00:24:20,604
Lump fast.

753
00:24:21,024 --> 00:24:21,084
Yeah.

754
00:24:21,084 --> 00:24:23,094
Most of those guys have been all talk.

755
00:24:23,724 --> 00:24:25,074
So that's, I mean, so once they say.

756
00:24:25,659 --> 00:24:26,649
A bull, they're out.

757
00:24:26,649 --> 00:24:26,859
Right.

758
00:24:26,859 --> 00:24:27,999
That's one of my red flags.

759
00:24:27,999 --> 00:24:28,089
Sure.

760
00:24:28,389 --> 00:24:34,119
And if the conversation is really
like casual, I am so okay with that,

761
00:24:34,119 --> 00:24:36,099
like that has opened up the door.

762
00:24:36,104 --> 00:24:36,354
Yeah.

763
00:24:36,854 --> 00:24:39,344
Because I will make the move
when I want it to be sexy.

764
00:24:39,344 --> 00:24:40,664
I will make the move if they make move.

765
00:24:40,664 --> 00:24:40,964
So in

766
00:24:40,964 --> 00:24:45,644
other words, you're saying
treat the woman like a person.

767
00:24:45,884 --> 00:24:45,974
Yes.

768
00:24:45,974 --> 00:24:47,234
And not an object.

769
00:24:47,294 --> 00:24:50,194
Don't treat me like I'm just
a pussy with extra lips.

770
00:24:50,694 --> 00:24:50,984
Yeah.

771
00:24:50,989 --> 00:24:51,169
Yeah.

772
00:24:51,384 --> 00:24:51,584
No.

773
00:24:51,584 --> 00:24:51,594
Yeah.

774
00:24:52,129 --> 00:24:56,319
That it's, and so that's, and you know,
that's, those are all like my green flags.

775
00:24:56,319 --> 00:24:57,719
Like, be super courteous.

776
00:24:57,719 --> 00:25:01,619
If you're a courteous person, I'm totally
going to be okay with talking to you.

777
00:25:02,079 --> 00:25:05,619
If you've got me already in a conversation
and you can hold up the conversation.

778
00:25:06,339 --> 00:25:06,819
Winning.

779
00:25:07,239 --> 00:25:07,569
Yeah.

780
00:25:07,629 --> 00:25:08,319
You're winning.

781
00:25:08,679 --> 00:25:09,759
If you can make her laugh again,

782
00:25:09,759 --> 00:25:10,629
you can make me laugh.

783
00:25:10,749 --> 00:25:11,169
Winning.

784
00:25:11,559 --> 00:25:15,189
And if you have, I want you to have
the utmost respect for my man, because

785
00:25:15,189 --> 00:25:19,239
if my man gets a bad vibe from you
while we're having a conversation.

786
00:25:20,124 --> 00:25:20,634
You're out.

787
00:25:21,154 --> 00:25:22,144
I will say this.

788
00:25:22,644 --> 00:25:27,324
I have any guy who's ever
been respectful to you

789
00:25:27,684 --> 00:25:27,834
mm-hmm.

790
00:25:28,314 --> 00:25:30,144
Has always been respectful to me.

791
00:25:30,384 --> 00:25:30,534
Yes.

792
00:25:30,534 --> 00:25:35,304
As a matter of fact, it's been very
rare that men aren't respectful to me.

793
00:25:35,304 --> 00:25:35,364
Yeah.

794
00:25:35,934 --> 00:25:39,444
There's been a couple times where
a guy has not acknowledged me.

795
00:25:39,504 --> 00:25:42,444
It's, it literally in the 15 years
that we've been doing this, it's

796
00:25:42,444 --> 00:25:43,764
only happened a handful of times.

797
00:25:43,819 --> 00:25:44,779
It's very rare.

798
00:25:45,109 --> 00:25:49,639
Most men will come up to me
first and be chummy with me and

799
00:25:49,639 --> 00:25:50,789
then make their way over to you.

800
00:25:50,789 --> 00:25:51,094
Mm-hmm.

801
00:25:51,439 --> 00:25:52,969
You know, once they know that I'm cool.

802
00:25:53,179 --> 00:25:53,479
Yeah.

803
00:25:53,529 --> 00:25:55,954
But there are some men

804
00:25:55,954 --> 00:25:56,464
mm-hmm.

805
00:25:56,749 --> 00:26:00,079
Who they don't know how
to talk to other men.

806
00:26:00,769 --> 00:26:02,239
They feel like it's awkward.

807
00:26:02,269 --> 00:26:02,329
Yeah.

808
00:26:02,329 --> 00:26:05,809
To go up to a guy and say, Hey
your wife is really attractive.

809
00:26:05,989 --> 00:26:07,129
Is it okay if I talk to her?

810
00:26:07,359 --> 00:26:11,169
I, I, there was a couple that
I was with one time and you

811
00:26:11,169 --> 00:26:12,279
didn't care for the guy Uhhuh.

812
00:26:12,779 --> 00:26:13,379
What was that?

813
00:26:14,249 --> 00:26:16,379
Was it just the con because
you didn't even wanna talk like

814
00:26:16,379 --> 00:26:19,109
it, was it the conversation or

815
00:26:19,159 --> 00:26:26,729
so that was a situation where I
felt they, well, I mean, it was

816
00:26:26,729 --> 00:26:28,169
very obvious they only wanted you.

817
00:26:28,259 --> 00:26:28,619
Yeah.

818
00:26:29,249 --> 00:26:33,299
And I just, I don't know what it was.

819
00:26:33,299 --> 00:26:34,349
I wanna know part of it.

820
00:26:34,589 --> 00:26:34,859
Yeah.

821
00:26:35,219 --> 00:26:36,269
I wanna know part of it.

822
00:26:36,639 --> 00:26:37,479
I, I didn't

823
00:26:38,199 --> 00:26:39,219
because you had told me No,

824
00:26:39,279 --> 00:26:42,679
the guy the guy I felt was fake.

825
00:26:43,459 --> 00:26:43,909
How funny.

826
00:26:43,909 --> 00:26:44,719
'cause we all, he was,

827
00:26:44,749 --> 00:26:46,819
he was, he turned out to be.

828
00:26:46,819 --> 00:26:50,479
And I, I very rarely get
vibes, bad vibes from people.

829
00:26:50,479 --> 00:26:51,139
I love everybody.

830
00:26:51,169 --> 00:26:51,349
Yeah.

831
00:26:51,799 --> 00:26:56,119
But the few times that I've gotten
bad vibes, I've backed away.

832
00:26:56,239 --> 00:26:56,479
Yeah.

833
00:26:56,569 --> 00:27:00,019
And I just always had this
very fake feeling from him.

834
00:27:00,019 --> 00:27:03,109
Like, it was all smiles to your
face and then the moment you

835
00:27:03,109 --> 00:27:04,279
turn your back, who knows what.

836
00:27:04,519 --> 00:27:04,609
Yeah.

837
00:27:04,609 --> 00:27:05,119
You know what I mean?

838
00:27:05,569 --> 00:27:07,959
And it turned out that, that
those were sort of mm-hmm.

839
00:27:08,199 --> 00:27:09,609
Correct vibes, but yeah.

840
00:27:09,609 --> 00:27:12,369
I just didn't, I had no interest.

841
00:27:12,489 --> 00:27:12,519
Okay.

842
00:27:12,579 --> 00:27:17,409
And then also it, knowing that
they were only interested in

843
00:27:17,409 --> 00:27:19,809
you and I wasn't in that piece.

844
00:27:19,814 --> 00:27:20,024
Mm-hmm.

845
00:27:20,349 --> 00:27:21,999
And I found the woman attractive.

846
00:27:22,449 --> 00:27:23,319
It's just a little difficult.

847
00:27:23,859 --> 00:27:24,909
It made you feel sour.

848
00:27:25,089 --> 00:27:25,419
Yeah.

849
00:27:25,419 --> 00:27:27,369
Not necessarily sour, but just that.

850
00:27:28,299 --> 00:27:29,169
I wanna be a part of that.

851
00:27:29,259 --> 00:27:29,589
Yeah.

852
00:27:29,589 --> 00:27:29,979
You know what I mean?

853
00:27:29,979 --> 00:27:31,179
Like, I wanna enjoy that.

854
00:27:31,184 --> 00:27:31,204
Yeah.

855
00:27:31,204 --> 00:27:32,349
But I'm obviously not.

856
00:27:32,349 --> 00:27:32,739
Yeah.

857
00:27:32,789 --> 00:27:34,919
And then of course they
want to get to know you.

858
00:27:35,189 --> 00:27:35,369
Yeah.

859
00:27:35,369 --> 00:27:39,749
And then also I didn't want to stand
in your way of getting to know them.

860
00:27:39,869 --> 00:27:40,109
Yeah.

861
00:27:40,349 --> 00:27:42,479
Because I tend to hijack conversations.

862
00:27:42,509 --> 00:27:42,809
Yeah.

863
00:27:43,109 --> 00:27:45,769
And so I was really like, nah,
you just all of these things

864
00:27:45,769 --> 00:27:48,139
I've liked you to have been there to
hijack the conversation, but Oh well.

865
00:27:48,259 --> 00:27:48,679
Yeah.

866
00:27:48,679 --> 00:27:50,764
Well, lesson learned, I
guess, for both of us.

867
00:27:50,764 --> 00:27:51,044
That's okay.

868
00:27:51,044 --> 00:27:51,064
I was

869
00:27:51,064 --> 00:27:51,074
just,

870
00:27:51,199 --> 00:27:53,859
but yeah, you know, it, it
really hasn't come up very often.

871
00:27:53,919 --> 00:27:54,189
No.

872
00:27:54,219 --> 00:27:58,539
Most of the people, most of the men
that I have come across, single or

873
00:27:58,539 --> 00:28:03,659
married if they've been respectful to
you, they've been respectful to me.

874
00:28:03,659 --> 00:28:07,379
And normally if they're respectful to
me, they're respectful to you as well.

875
00:28:07,469 --> 00:28:07,739
Yeah.

876
00:28:08,009 --> 00:28:11,929
Uh, and so I really haven't
run into it too much.

877
00:28:12,619 --> 00:28:17,329
Now I know that things have
happened that I'm not supposed

878
00:28:17,329 --> 00:28:20,389
to know about because they don't
realize that we talk to each other.

879
00:28:20,389 --> 00:28:20,959
Mm-hmm.

880
00:28:20,960 --> 00:28:20,970
But.

881
00:28:21,634 --> 00:28:23,179
She'll get messages from guys.

882
00:28:23,189 --> 00:28:25,114
She'll get, told all sorts of stuff.

883
00:28:25,814 --> 00:28:29,044
A lot of times though, you get
it from both men and women.

884
00:28:29,734 --> 00:28:30,154
Yes.

885
00:28:30,184 --> 00:28:31,144
It's not just men.

886
00:28:31,324 --> 00:28:31,684
No.

887
00:28:32,104 --> 00:28:34,744
But we like to label men
because that's the easier thing.

888
00:28:34,924 --> 00:28:35,164
Yeah.

889
00:28:35,404 --> 00:28:36,214
I get 'em from both.

890
00:28:36,574 --> 00:28:37,594
I get the, uh,

891
00:28:38,014 --> 00:28:39,124
double standards guys.

892
00:28:39,499 --> 00:28:42,879
I do get the aggressive sometimes
messages from people, you know, but

893
00:28:42,879 --> 00:28:46,899
I realized that once I try to vet
the ladies, these ladies are mainly

894
00:28:46,899 --> 00:28:48,999
not in our group, our community.

895
00:28:48,999 --> 00:28:52,199
And so when I get messages from
that, it's usually a fake account.

896
00:28:52,384 --> 00:28:52,674
Yeah.

897
00:28:53,009 --> 00:28:53,279
Yeah.

898
00:28:53,579 --> 00:28:58,399
I think that a lot of times when you get
on like SDC or if you're on a co, uh, like

899
00:28:58,399 --> 00:29:03,139
if you're talking to a, a supposed couple
on one of these other sites or whatever

900
00:29:03,144 --> 00:29:03,264
mm-hmm.

901
00:29:03,769 --> 00:29:07,519
Or even a couple's profile, you don't
know exactly who you're talking to.

902
00:29:07,579 --> 00:29:09,769
If you're talking to
the man or to the woman.

903
00:29:10,189 --> 00:29:13,759
And even if they say they're
the woman, you still don't know.

904
00:29:13,759 --> 00:29:15,139
I always think it's the man.

905
00:29:15,769 --> 00:29:16,819
You still don't know

906
00:29:16,999 --> 00:29:19,009
because I, I mean, I
always think it's the man.

907
00:29:19,159 --> 00:29:19,399
Yeah.

908
00:29:19,519 --> 00:29:21,769
I never like think it's the woman.

909
00:29:21,799 --> 00:29:21,979
Oh.

910
00:29:21,979 --> 00:29:24,919
And if they sent nothing, if it's a
group or thing like that, a a couple

911
00:29:24,919 --> 00:29:28,609
and they're like, yeah, look, here's
pictures, here's some pictures of me.

912
00:29:28,939 --> 00:29:30,109
Ah, lies.

913
00:29:30,259 --> 00:29:31,189
You are the husband.

914
00:29:31,189 --> 00:29:35,849
We've, we've had couples, quote
unquote couples from couples profiles

915
00:29:35,849 --> 00:29:37,559
reach out to us and talk to us.

916
00:29:37,614 --> 00:29:42,174
And we've seen how they've talked
and sat back and gone, there's

917
00:29:42,174 --> 00:29:43,434
no way that that's a woman.

918
00:29:43,704 --> 00:29:43,944
No

919
00:29:44,004 --> 00:29:44,934
men talk like that.

920
00:29:44,939 --> 00:29:45,099
Mm-hmm.

921
00:29:45,179 --> 00:29:46,194
Women don't talk like that.

922
00:29:46,194 --> 00:29:46,284
Mm-hmm.

923
00:29:47,034 --> 00:29:51,434
We've, different things that have
been said, uh, if they lead right into

924
00:29:51,434 --> 00:29:53,744
shooting you a, a video of them Yes.

925
00:29:53,744 --> 00:29:54,584
Having sex.

926
00:29:55,334 --> 00:29:57,134
It's not the woman without
any solicitation, like without

927
00:29:57,134 --> 00:29:58,664
any question or consent.

928
00:29:59,324 --> 00:30:00,284
It's usually the guy.

929
00:30:00,344 --> 00:30:00,524
Mm-hmm.

930
00:30:01,394 --> 00:30:05,804
And you know, that's the hard part
about this whole online experience

931
00:30:05,804 --> 00:30:08,204
now is that you really don't know.

932
00:30:08,939 --> 00:30:11,129
If you're talking to the actual person.

933
00:30:11,159 --> 00:30:11,249
Mm-hmm.

934
00:30:11,879 --> 00:30:17,189
But I digress because we're,
we're legitimately talking about

935
00:30:17,649 --> 00:30:18,759
Single men Yeah.

936
00:30:18,789 --> 00:30:19,659
In the lifestyle.

937
00:30:19,689 --> 00:30:19,869
Yeah.

938
00:30:20,169 --> 00:30:23,139
And going back to the single men portion

939
00:30:23,469 --> 00:30:23,949
of it, they do have it hard.

940
00:30:24,039 --> 00:30:24,909
They have it a lot.

941
00:30:24,909 --> 00:30:28,589
And I, I mean, I like single men
and, but they do have it hard.

942
00:30:29,369 --> 00:30:31,589
And what's even tougher,
check this out guys.

943
00:30:31,949 --> 00:30:32,069
I,

944
00:30:32,069 --> 00:30:33,779
if you haven't been to a club

945
00:30:34,079 --> 00:30:34,379
Yeah.

946
00:30:34,769 --> 00:30:38,369
And you try to go to a club as
a single guy without a door date

947
00:30:38,669 --> 00:30:42,009
You're gonna pay out, out the
ass if they even let you go.

948
00:30:42,509 --> 00:30:45,569
Some nights it's couples
and single women only.

949
00:30:45,629 --> 00:30:45,779
Mm-hmm.

950
00:30:46,019 --> 00:30:46,769
No single men.

951
00:30:46,774 --> 00:30:46,984
Mm-hmm.

952
00:30:47,099 --> 00:30:48,479
There's house parties out there.

953
00:30:48,989 --> 00:30:51,479
No single men or select single men.

954
00:30:51,479 --> 00:30:52,414
You have to be vetted.

955
00:30:52,924 --> 00:30:54,184
And sometimes you gotta pay more.

956
00:30:54,304 --> 00:30:55,864
Single men have it rough.

957
00:30:56,164 --> 00:30:59,164
And then you pay all this money
to get into a club or to get into

958
00:30:59,164 --> 00:31:02,134
a party, and there's no guarantee
that you're even gonna get late.

959
00:31:02,634 --> 00:31:02,934
Dude,

960
00:31:02,964 --> 00:31:03,624
it's hard.

961
00:31:03,624 --> 00:31:04,794
It is hard for you guys.

962
00:31:04,794 --> 00:31:07,674
Like I give y'all problems for
still being in the lifestyle.

963
00:31:08,184 --> 00:31:12,534
It's a difficult area to
kind of maneuver through.

964
00:31:12,804 --> 00:31:18,724
Like you, you have to know somebody,
like a single person has to know

965
00:31:18,724 --> 00:31:21,364
somebody that's in the community to
even break through that community.

966
00:31:21,364 --> 00:31:21,424
Yeah.

967
00:31:21,724 --> 00:31:25,854
And you have to be a person that
they like, because if you're

968
00:31:25,854 --> 00:31:29,004
a person they don't like, they
will tell the community, Nope,

969
00:31:29,154 --> 00:31:29,574
very quickly,

970
00:31:29,574 --> 00:31:30,744
sorry we brought 'em in.

971
00:31:30,744 --> 00:31:31,494
We don't like them

972
00:31:31,554 --> 00:31:31,674
very

973
00:31:31,674 --> 00:31:32,784
quickly and this is what it's for.

974
00:31:32,934 --> 00:31:33,114
Yeah.

975
00:31:33,204 --> 00:31:38,114
Because we are, we are a big
community, but stuff like that flies.

976
00:31:38,114 --> 00:31:39,044
It goes fast.

977
00:31:39,104 --> 00:31:39,554
It does.

978
00:31:39,554 --> 00:31:39,734
You know,

979
00:31:39,734 --> 00:31:40,364
it goes through those

980
00:31:40,364 --> 00:31:40,664
vs.

981
00:31:40,664 --> 00:31:41,609
Real quick, we have.

982
00:31:42,419 --> 00:31:46,559
A lot of the groups that we're in the
community, groups that we're in on

983
00:31:46,559 --> 00:31:50,079
Facebook and things like that don't
even let a lot of single guys in there.

984
00:31:50,079 --> 00:31:50,384
Mm-hmm.

985
00:31:50,609 --> 00:31:56,069
Because they figure these
couples, uh, just don't care

986
00:31:56,069 --> 00:31:57,869
for a lot of these single guys.

987
00:31:58,049 --> 00:31:58,139
Mm-hmm.

988
00:31:58,484 --> 00:32:00,239
So why would I let a single guy in?

989
00:32:00,389 --> 00:32:04,139
Because they're just gonna message
unsolicited, all of these different women.

990
00:32:04,199 --> 00:32:04,499
Yeah.

991
00:32:04,619 --> 00:32:05,459
Trying to get them on.

992
00:32:05,489 --> 00:32:06,449
That's the assumption.

993
00:32:06,454 --> 00:32:06,664
Mm-hmm.

994
00:32:07,019 --> 00:32:07,649
That's the assumption.

995
00:32:07,649 --> 00:32:08,489
That's the assumption.

996
00:32:08,879 --> 00:32:12,449
And all it takes is for
a single guy to slip out

997
00:32:13,079 --> 00:32:13,319
once.

998
00:32:13,319 --> 00:32:16,169
Just once and you get banned.

999
00:32:16,229 --> 00:32:16,439
Yeah.

1000
00:32:16,679 --> 00:32:17,489
You know what I mean?

1001
00:32:17,609 --> 00:32:17,819
Yeah.

1002
00:32:17,879 --> 00:32:19,799
And I've had single guys
talk to me all the time.

1003
00:32:19,829 --> 00:32:22,259
I've had so many single guys reach
out to me and go, you need to

1004
00:32:22,259 --> 00:32:23,489
have me as a guest on your show.

1005
00:32:23,729 --> 00:32:26,249
Let me tell you something,
single guys, I love you to death.

1006
00:32:26,549 --> 00:32:29,159
I will never have a single guy on
the show, and I'll tell you why.

1007
00:32:29,659 --> 00:32:31,369
And it's not any disrespect to you.

1008
00:32:31,869 --> 00:32:37,689
But if I have a single guy on this show,
all they're gonna do is most likely

1009
00:32:37,689 --> 00:32:39,909
talk about their negative experiences.

1010
00:32:39,969 --> 00:32:40,089
Mm-hmm.

1011
00:32:40,329 --> 00:32:41,769
Of which I already know.

1012
00:32:41,769 --> 00:32:43,389
Look, guy, I am on your side.

1013
00:32:43,569 --> 00:32:43,779
Yeah.

1014
00:32:43,839 --> 00:32:48,144
If you are respectful and you're a
legit good single dude and you operate

1015
00:32:48,144 --> 00:32:49,909
off of consent and respect mm-hmm.

1016
00:32:50,604 --> 00:32:52,764
I am advocating for you, bro.

1017
00:32:53,184 --> 00:32:57,174
So I don't need you to come on and,
and spill your negative tea about your

1018
00:32:57,174 --> 00:32:58,824
different experiences here or there.

1019
00:32:58,829 --> 00:32:58,929
Mm-hmm.

1020
00:32:59,429 --> 00:32:59,729
You don't need to.

1021
00:33:00,179 --> 00:33:00,779
I got you.

1022
00:33:01,169 --> 00:33:01,769
I've seen it.

1023
00:33:02,129 --> 00:33:05,189
And we have actually been that couple

1024
00:33:05,189 --> 00:33:05,549
mm-hmm.

1025
00:33:06,209 --> 00:33:07,139
To push that.

1026
00:33:07,189 --> 00:33:11,299
That, that ideal, you know, we
were there, we were those couples

1027
00:33:11,299 --> 00:33:12,619
early on, we were like mm-hmm.

1028
00:33:12,679 --> 00:33:13,429
These single guys.

1029
00:33:13,489 --> 00:33:13,759
Mm-hmm.

1030
00:33:13,789 --> 00:33:14,059
Nope.

1031
00:33:14,329 --> 00:33:15,439
They are, they're shitty.

1032
00:33:15,844 --> 00:33:16,474
You know what I mean?

1033
00:33:16,864 --> 00:33:21,154
And it took us going our way through
the lifestyle to realize that no, it's,

1034
00:33:21,154 --> 00:33:21,544
no,

1035
00:33:21,964 --> 00:33:23,644
It's just a certain type of men.

1036
00:33:23,704 --> 00:33:24,244
Yes.

1037
00:33:24,514 --> 00:33:27,394
And not necessarily whether or
not they're single or married.

1038
00:33:27,484 --> 00:33:28,024
Exactly.

1039
00:33:28,084 --> 00:33:29,584
It's a certain type of man.

1040
00:33:30,334 --> 00:33:35,644
This is the tough part because Yes,
I, I do advocate for respectful

1041
00:33:36,004 --> 00:33:42,374
single men that does not account
for all of the disrespectful

1042
00:33:42,524 --> 00:33:43,844
single men that are out there.

1043
00:33:43,849 --> 00:33:43,929
Mm-hmm.

1044
00:33:44,029 --> 00:33:44,689
And they're there.

1045
00:33:45,044 --> 00:33:45,164
Mm-hmm.

1046
00:33:45,404 --> 00:33:49,784
I mean, we see 'em come up in, I've
recently, I think I saw one of the

1047
00:33:49,784 --> 00:33:55,634
groups that we're in, where a single
guy, single was messaging other

1048
00:33:55,634 --> 00:34:00,664
women on their own, but he was trying
to portray himself as a couple.

1049
00:34:01,164 --> 00:34:04,704
He came into the group as a single person,
but then he would message these women

1050
00:34:04,704 --> 00:34:06,594
trying to portray himself as a couple.

1051
00:34:06,594 --> 00:34:07,434
I thought I saw something.

1052
00:34:07,439 --> 00:34:07,449
Okay.

1053
00:34:07,449 --> 00:34:07,689
Yeah.

1054
00:34:07,884 --> 00:34:10,944
And trying to get them hooked in and.

1055
00:34:11,444 --> 00:34:13,664
It would come about
that there was no woman.

1056
00:34:13,664 --> 00:34:16,484
Anytime they would ask to verify
there was no woman, you know?

1057
00:34:16,484 --> 00:34:16,844
Oh,

1058
00:34:17,024 --> 00:34:17,324
yeah.

1059
00:34:17,324 --> 00:34:17,334
Yeah.

1060
00:34:18,139 --> 00:34:18,989
Like, why

1061
00:34:19,484 --> 00:34:20,234
don't lie?

1062
00:34:20,234 --> 00:34:22,694
Are you gonna, are you gonna trick
somebody into having sex with you?

1063
00:34:22,994 --> 00:34:24,284
That is not fun, guy.

1064
00:34:24,644 --> 00:34:25,814
Like, that's not a good time.

1065
00:34:26,624 --> 00:34:28,184
You gonna have your inflatable doll.

1066
00:34:28,834 --> 00:34:32,584
I don't know how women are when it comes
to being tricked into laying in bed

1067
00:34:32,584 --> 00:34:35,494
and then all of a sudden you're in bed
with your legs open and the guy's like,

1068
00:34:35,524 --> 00:34:37,714
oh yeah, by the way, uh, I'm single.

1069
00:34:37,714 --> 00:34:38,674
I'm not actually married.

1070
00:34:38,884 --> 00:34:41,764
No, my wife's not in the closet
Like I initially said, but hey, my

1071
00:34:41,764 --> 00:34:44,014
dick's right here at your pussy, so
let's just go ahead and have sex.

1072
00:34:44,974 --> 00:34:47,564
Oh, man, that's not, I,
I, I just don't see it.

1073
00:34:47,564 --> 00:34:49,054
It doesn't make sense to me.

1074
00:34:49,054 --> 00:34:51,154
Make it doesn't make sense to me.

1075
00:34:51,154 --> 00:34:52,354
It seems very illogical.

1076
00:34:52,354 --> 00:34:53,674
Metimes think with their
dick and not with their head.

1077
00:34:53,894 --> 00:34:57,544
Maybe So I, I tell you this though, if
I were a single man, I don't know if

1078
00:34:57,544 --> 00:34:59,604
I'd be in the lifestyle I would date.

1079
00:34:59,604 --> 00:35:01,319
If I was a single woman, I would
definitely be in the lifestyle.

1080
00:35:01,979 --> 00:35:02,284
Well, it's different,

1081
00:35:02,639 --> 00:35:03,389
but yeah, it is very,

1082
00:35:03,389 --> 00:35:04,949
because you're bisexual for one thing.

1083
00:35:05,564 --> 00:35:08,534
And if you're a bisexual man, I could
understand being in the lifestyle.

1084
00:35:08,594 --> 00:35:08,834
Yeah.

1085
00:35:08,924 --> 00:35:12,034
But if you're a single
straight man, what's the point

1086
00:35:12,034 --> 00:35:12,964
of being in the lifestyle?

1087
00:35:12,964 --> 00:35:14,194
Can somebody explain that to me?

1088
00:35:14,374 --> 00:35:17,944
If you can hit me up on one of,
one of my avenues and let me know.

1089
00:35:17,944 --> 00:35:18,184
Yeah, because we've

1090
00:35:18,184 --> 00:35:19,234
always asked that.

1091
00:35:19,239 --> 00:35:19,279
Yeah.

1092
00:35:19,279 --> 00:35:19,559
Like, yeah.

1093
00:35:19,564 --> 00:35:20,944
I just don't understand it personally.

1094
00:35:20,944 --> 00:35:21,409
I'm not like as a a

1095
00:35:21,409 --> 00:35:22,034
woman, you're right.

1096
00:35:22,384 --> 00:35:23,764
I'm not saying it's a bad thing.

1097
00:35:23,884 --> 00:35:28,234
I'm sure you have your reasons, but if
you're a single guy in the lifestyle

1098
00:35:28,234 --> 00:35:31,924
and you're not necessarily looking
for a relationship, what's the point?

1099
00:35:32,134 --> 00:35:32,464
Yeah.

1100
00:35:32,554 --> 00:35:36,034
As a single man, you could have sex
with women in the vanilla lifestyle,

1101
00:35:36,184 --> 00:35:39,214
and you're still gonna have to,
is it because maybe you have, you

1102
00:35:39,214 --> 00:35:40,504
don't have to take 'em out on dates.

1103
00:35:40,744 --> 00:35:41,224
Is that what it is?

1104
00:35:42,004 --> 00:35:44,734
Maybe it's a little bit easier to
just come straight to it and say,

1105
00:35:44,734 --> 00:35:46,144
Hey, yeah, I, I just wanna have sex.

1106
00:35:46,934 --> 00:35:48,014
Because that would make sense.

1107
00:35:48,074 --> 00:35:49,094
That would make sense.

1108
00:35:49,304 --> 00:35:50,879
But I don't think that I

1109
00:35:50,879 --> 00:35:51,159
would do it.

1110
00:35:51,159 --> 00:35:52,394
I don't, yeah, we've talked about that.

1111
00:35:52,394 --> 00:35:53,384
We're like, why?

1112
00:35:53,594 --> 00:35:53,834
Yeah.

1113
00:35:53,834 --> 00:35:54,104
No,

1114
00:35:54,164 --> 00:35:55,724
they, I mean, because
y'all do have it hard.

1115
00:35:56,414 --> 00:35:58,904
It's, it to me just doesn't seem worth it.

1116
00:35:59,144 --> 00:35:59,354
Yeah.

1117
00:35:59,754 --> 00:36:01,734
It seems like a lot of
jumping through hoops.

1118
00:36:01,734 --> 00:36:04,314
Hell, as a married guy in the lifestyle,

1119
00:36:04,404 --> 00:36:04,614
it's

1120
00:36:04,614 --> 00:36:09,294
hard trying to pursue
my own vaginal feats.

1121
00:36:09,794 --> 00:36:11,804
I have to really work hard at it.

1122
00:36:12,524 --> 00:36:12,914
You know what?

1123
00:36:13,604 --> 00:36:17,054
My vaginal FETs, my vagina goals.

1124
00:36:17,894 --> 00:36:18,854
Vagina goals.

1125
00:36:19,284 --> 00:36:19,764
Yeah.

1126
00:36:19,794 --> 00:36:20,094
No.

1127
00:36:20,094 --> 00:36:27,074
You know, I, no, because you and
I, we, we now play separately.

1128
00:36:27,344 --> 00:36:28,304
We can play separately.

1129
00:36:28,304 --> 00:36:28,314
Yeah.

1130
00:36:28,314 --> 00:36:28,354
We can play separately.

1131
00:36:28,354 --> 00:36:28,459
Yeah.

1132
00:36:28,484 --> 00:36:28,664
Yeah.

1133
00:36:28,774 --> 00:36:29,464
With that.

1134
00:36:30,094 --> 00:36:32,404
If there's somebody that I wanna pursue.

1135
00:36:32,524 --> 00:36:32,614
Yeah.

1136
00:36:32,614 --> 00:36:34,729
And this kind of goes back
to the very beginning.

1137
00:36:34,789 --> 00:36:35,009
Oh

1138
00:36:35,029 --> 00:36:35,249
God.

1139
00:36:35,249 --> 00:36:35,489
Okay.

1140
00:36:35,489 --> 00:36:35,849
Hold off people.

1141
00:36:35,849 --> 00:36:38,129
This goes, goes back to the very beginning
because one, make sure you don't, one

1142
00:36:38,299 --> 00:36:38,649
don't.

1143
00:36:38,649 --> 00:36:42,904
If you wanna get in his pants, make
sure you don't mention how pretty I am.

1144
00:36:42,904 --> 00:36:47,244
If I reach out to you and I state
to you that I am interested.

1145
00:36:47,244 --> 00:36:48,774
I didn't say we are interested in you.

1146
00:36:48,834 --> 00:36:50,844
I said I am interested in you.

1147
00:36:51,144 --> 00:36:53,084
Oh wait, if she's pretty,
can I be interested too?

1148
00:36:53,414 --> 00:36:54,649
Yes, but we're not.

1149
00:36:54,799 --> 00:36:54,919
Okay.

1150
00:36:54,919 --> 00:36:55,309
We're not talking

1151
00:36:55,309 --> 00:36:55,579
about that.

1152
00:36:55,579 --> 00:36:55,909
Sorry.

1153
00:36:56,029 --> 00:36:57,619
Don't step on my dick here, babe.

1154
00:36:58,009 --> 00:36:58,369
Alright.

1155
00:36:58,369 --> 00:36:58,699
Look,

1156
00:36:59,059 --> 00:36:59,239
fuck.

1157
00:36:59,239 --> 00:36:59,599
Block.

1158
00:36:59,839 --> 00:37:05,539
If I message you and I state that I
am interested in you and you come back

1159
00:37:05,539 --> 00:37:08,269
with your wife's so hot, fuck off man.

1160
00:37:08,809 --> 00:37:09,289
We're done.

1161
00:37:09,499 --> 00:37:10,039
That's it.

1162
00:37:10,339 --> 00:37:10,849
That's it.

1163
00:37:11,119 --> 00:37:14,289
Because I am at this point in my
life, in this, when can they say it?

1164
00:37:14,289 --> 00:37:16,369
In this journey that I can say no.

1165
00:37:16,549 --> 00:37:17,569
When can they say it?

1166
00:37:17,989 --> 00:37:18,919
When can they say it?

1167
00:37:18,919 --> 00:37:19,129
Yeah.

1168
00:37:19,629 --> 00:37:20,499
After we've had sex.

1169
00:37:20,634 --> 00:37:20,794
Okay.

1170
00:37:21,294 --> 00:37:22,284
No, but really, I mean.

1171
00:37:22,824 --> 00:37:24,444
It's okay to say it.

1172
00:37:24,444 --> 00:37:24,894
It's it.

1173
00:37:25,164 --> 00:37:26,154
I actually, I, it's

1174
00:37:26,154 --> 00:37:27,504
okay to have a, give a compliment.

1175
00:37:27,504 --> 00:37:31,734
I appreciate the compliment in
appreciation of my wife, but when you

1176
00:37:31,734 --> 00:37:37,394
rave nonstop about it, that's when
I'm like, okay, rave about me nonstop.

1177
00:37:37,394 --> 00:37:37,604
Maybe.

1178
00:37:37,844 --> 00:37:38,744
I mean, even it up.

1179
00:37:39,494 --> 00:37:39,524
Aw,

1180
00:37:39,524 --> 00:37:39,854
I do.

1181
00:37:39,854 --> 00:37:40,754
But see, that's the thing.

1182
00:37:40,754 --> 00:37:42,224
You've gotta rave about him.

1183
00:37:42,314 --> 00:37:42,554
God no.

1184
00:37:42,554 --> 00:37:45,794
But see, and, and even still like,
look at this, check this out.

1185
00:37:46,004 --> 00:37:46,784
Oh my God.

1186
00:37:47,474 --> 00:37:50,914
When we're talking to a couple,
when we're talking to a couple,

1187
00:37:51,724 --> 00:37:53,284
obviously I'm a straight man.

1188
00:37:53,344 --> 00:37:54,394
I'm into the woman,

1189
00:37:54,604 --> 00:37:54,934
right?

1190
00:37:55,054 --> 00:37:56,464
I am flirting with the woman.

1191
00:37:56,464 --> 00:37:57,724
I'm complimenting a woman.

1192
00:37:57,724 --> 00:37:58,714
You know what I also do?

1193
00:37:59,214 --> 00:38:00,864
I throw compliments to my guys.

1194
00:38:00,954 --> 00:38:01,164
Yeah.

1195
00:38:02,004 --> 00:38:02,994
I show them the

1196
00:38:02,994 --> 00:38:03,564
respect.

1197
00:38:03,564 --> 00:38:04,284
You know, we're just talking about that.

1198
00:38:04,374 --> 00:38:06,774
But the guys never
bring compliments to me.

1199
00:38:07,374 --> 00:38:07,764
No.

1200
00:38:07,854 --> 00:38:08,544
Isn't that weird?

1201
00:38:08,594 --> 00:38:14,204
Adam will compliment the wife of the
couple and the group text, but the

1202
00:38:14,204 --> 00:38:16,544
husband will never give me a compliment.

1203
00:38:17,044 --> 00:38:17,224
Several

1204
00:38:17,224 --> 00:38:17,554
times

1205
00:38:17,559 --> 00:38:17,639
over.

1206
00:38:17,649 --> 00:38:18,159
We've had that.

1207
00:38:18,279 --> 00:38:22,414
I think it's because the wife
maybe not, might not like that.

1208
00:38:22,444 --> 00:38:26,254
I mean, we have, we have couples
where they're giving me compliments.

1209
00:38:26,254 --> 00:38:26,884
Both of them.

1210
00:38:26,944 --> 00:38:27,154
Yeah.

1211
00:38:27,634 --> 00:38:28,984
Both of 'em are giving me compliments.

1212
00:38:29,014 --> 00:38:29,134
Yeah.

1213
00:38:29,444 --> 00:38:30,704
And you're giving her compliments.

1214
00:38:30,704 --> 00:38:30,764
Yeah.

1215
00:38:30,824 --> 00:38:32,204
And you're giving him compliments.

1216
00:38:32,334 --> 00:38:35,364
I just feel like it should be equal man.

1217
00:38:35,364 --> 00:38:38,334
You know, like if I'm complimenting
the woman, if I'm flirting with the

1218
00:38:38,334 --> 00:38:42,534
woman, I'm not gonna let my guy just
sit out there in the cold and feel

1219
00:38:42,534 --> 00:38:44,334
like, oh, well I'm just over here.

1220
00:38:44,704 --> 00:38:45,334
Check please.

1221
00:38:45,424 --> 00:38:45,934
You know what I mean?

1222
00:38:45,934 --> 00:38:46,149
You have to.

1223
00:38:46,509 --> 00:38:48,004
'
cause I felt that so many times.

1224
00:38:48,004 --> 00:38:48,064
Yeah.

1225
00:38:48,484 --> 00:38:50,554
So I give that respect to the guys.

1226
00:38:51,064 --> 00:38:51,724
Yeah, you do.

1227
00:38:51,994 --> 00:38:52,924
You bro it up.

1228
00:38:52,924 --> 00:38:52,934
Dude,

1229
00:38:53,014 --> 00:38:53,884
I do bro it up.

1230
00:38:53,944 --> 00:38:55,909
Like he bros it up.

1231
00:38:56,074 --> 00:38:57,124
I totally bro it up.

1232
00:38:57,634 --> 00:39:02,584
I bro it up so much that I've even told
guys I've been like, Hey, nice dick.

1233
00:39:03,034 --> 00:39:03,844
Good for you, pal.

1234
00:39:03,994 --> 00:39:05,674
He bros it.

1235
00:39:05,674 --> 00:39:06,574
I bro it up

1236
00:39:06,579 --> 00:39:06,964
up guys.

1237
00:39:07,204 --> 00:39:07,264
Yeah.

1238
00:39:07,264 --> 00:39:10,084
And I am straight as a frigging arrow.

1239
00:39:10,264 --> 00:39:10,864
Yes he is.

1240
00:39:10,969 --> 00:39:11,189
But.

1241
00:39:11,689 --> 00:39:13,039
To me, it's a respectful thing.

1242
00:39:13,489 --> 00:39:14,659
It's a respectful thing.

1243
00:39:14,839 --> 00:39:19,939
You know, we have to do a show on bisexual
men because y'all, even bisexual men

1244
00:39:19,939 --> 00:39:22,789
even have it harder in the lifestyle.

1245
00:39:22,819 --> 00:39:22,849
Oh.

1246
00:39:22,849 --> 00:39:23,599
We've done a show with

1247
00:39:23,599 --> 00:39:24,289
than a single

1248
00:39:24,289 --> 00:39:25,189
United by Swingers.

1249
00:39:25,189 --> 00:39:25,879
We have.

1250
00:39:25,939 --> 00:39:26,029
Yeah.

1251
00:39:26,029 --> 00:39:28,759
Guys, go and listen to United By Swingers.

1252
00:39:28,969 --> 00:39:29,514
They're a great podcast.

1253
00:39:29,514 --> 00:39:30,049
Great podcast.

1254
00:39:30,709 --> 00:39:32,719
They're, they're all
about the bisexual couple

1255
00:39:32,749 --> 00:39:32,929
Yes.

1256
00:39:33,079 --> 00:39:34,429
And the bisexual couple experience.

1257
00:39:34,429 --> 00:39:34,519
Yes.

1258
00:39:34,519 --> 00:39:35,779
And especially bisexual men.

1259
00:39:35,959 --> 00:39:36,169
Yeah.

1260
00:39:36,229 --> 00:39:41,719
But I feel like people are, uh, men
are afraid to compliment other men

1261
00:39:42,079 --> 00:39:42,289
Yeah.

1262
00:39:42,289 --> 00:39:46,529
In this lifestyle because they're
afraid they're gonna come off

1263
00:39:46,889 --> 00:39:50,609
as homosexual, which, what?

1264
00:39:51,359 --> 00:39:52,259
Why is that even a thing?

1265
00:39:52,799 --> 00:39:53,549
Like who gives a shit?

1266
00:39:53,999 --> 00:39:54,419
Yeah.

1267
00:39:54,669 --> 00:39:55,509
I don't understand that.

1268
00:39:55,509 --> 00:39:56,529
If you give a shit.

1269
00:39:56,919 --> 00:39:58,239
You should not be in the lifestyle.

1270
00:39:58,539 --> 00:40:00,189
I've had guys in the lifestyle.

1271
00:40:00,189 --> 00:40:00,729
Tell me.

1272
00:40:01,229 --> 00:40:05,339
So you guys want me, I, they're
new to the lifestyle, but they'd

1273
00:40:05,339 --> 00:40:08,969
be like, oh, so you guys want me
to join you guys, but I'm not gay.

1274
00:40:09,779 --> 00:40:10,649
No motherfucker.

1275
00:40:10,649 --> 00:40:11,249
Neither am I.

1276
00:40:11,249 --> 00:40:11,369
Great.

1277
00:40:11,369 --> 00:40:12,539
Good for

1278
00:40:12,539 --> 00:40:12,599
you.

1279
00:40:12,599 --> 00:40:16,379
I'm not asking you to suck my dick
and I'm not asking to suck yours.

1280
00:40:16,919 --> 00:40:19,289
As a matter of fact, if our
dicks can stay as far away as

1281
00:40:19,289 --> 00:40:21,689
possible, that'd be fine with me.

1282
00:40:21,929 --> 00:40:22,049
Yeah.

1283
00:40:22,049 --> 00:40:23,159
I'm not gonna complain at all.

1284
00:40:23,159 --> 00:40:23,909
It's just about me.

1285
00:40:24,179 --> 00:40:24,749
That's right.

1286
00:40:24,839 --> 00:40:25,319
Just about me.

1287
00:40:25,319 --> 00:40:25,979
It's about her.

1288
00:40:26,039 --> 00:40:28,619
If we're bringing in a
single guy, it's just for me.

1289
00:40:28,649 --> 00:40:30,179
But that's the mentality.

1290
00:40:30,179 --> 00:40:31,409
And I, that's the mentality.

1291
00:40:31,409 --> 00:40:34,169
I've been told that by
guys who claim to be bulls.

1292
00:40:34,379 --> 00:40:34,649
Yep.

1293
00:40:35,429 --> 00:40:36,149
Well, I'm not gay.

1294
00:40:36,149 --> 00:40:39,359
I would rather have sex
with her in the room

1295
00:40:39,364 --> 00:40:39,634
and you could

1296
00:40:39,634 --> 00:40:41,524
just watch by myself and yell.

1297
00:40:41,524 --> 00:40:41,644
Yeah.

1298
00:40:41,644 --> 00:40:42,509
And you stay outside the room.

1299
00:40:42,509 --> 00:40:42,899
You remember that?

1300
00:40:42,959 --> 00:40:43,169
Yeah.

1301
00:40:43,949 --> 00:40:44,549
Shit, motherfucker.

1302
00:40:44,759 --> 00:40:45,119
Nah.

1303
00:40:45,119 --> 00:40:45,809
Who talking to?

1304
00:40:46,309 --> 00:40:47,199
He's my protector.

1305
00:40:47,439 --> 00:40:47,919
I don't think so.

1306
00:40:48,219 --> 00:40:48,439
No.

1307
00:40:48,699 --> 00:40:48,919
Uh.

1308
00:40:49,904 --> 00:40:53,474
But that's, you know, like I said, I can
go back and forth on this all day long.

1309
00:40:53,474 --> 00:40:53,534
Yeah.

1310
00:40:53,864 --> 00:40:56,564
Because I've met so many respectful men.

1311
00:40:56,594 --> 00:40:56,864
Yeah.

1312
00:40:56,864 --> 00:41:00,224
Like I have a single friend, we
uh, we have a friend and he's a

1313
00:41:00,224 --> 00:41:03,014
single guy and I love fucking him.

1314
00:41:03,359 --> 00:41:03,719
Yeah.

1315
00:41:03,749 --> 00:41:04,139
Oh yeah,

1316
00:41:04,229 --> 00:41:04,649
yeah.

1317
00:41:04,649 --> 00:41:08,059
Like we're going out of town
and hopefully I get to fuck him.

1318
00:41:08,299 --> 00:41:08,569
Yeah.

1319
00:41:08,719 --> 00:41:09,859
Super respectful.

1320
00:41:10,309 --> 00:41:10,699
Yeah.

1321
00:41:11,199 --> 00:41:11,499
Yeah.

1322
00:41:11,499 --> 00:41:15,919
But and now let's, let's the same, let's
flip this on its ear a little bit Uhhuh

1323
00:41:16,194 --> 00:41:20,474
because we're talking about single guys
and can we say the exact same thing

1324
00:41:20,474 --> 00:41:22,574
about single women in the lifestyle?

1325
00:41:22,844 --> 00:41:23,144
No.

1326
00:41:23,714 --> 00:41:24,044
Really.

1327
00:41:24,524 --> 00:41:25,124
Now

1328
00:41:25,514 --> 00:41:25,934
really

1329
00:41:25,934 --> 00:41:26,594
hold up

1330
00:41:27,074 --> 00:41:29,474
because I bet some
disrespectful single women

1331
00:41:29,504 --> 00:41:30,974
on our ends.

1332
00:41:31,574 --> 00:41:34,514
And this is just because I am very vocal.

1333
00:41:34,514 --> 00:41:35,834
I am a very vocal.

1334
00:41:36,464 --> 00:41:41,794
Transparent person if you're a single
woman that comes into and talking to us.

1335
00:41:41,854 --> 00:41:42,604
Oh, I am.

1336
00:41:42,964 --> 00:41:43,204
Yeah.

1337
00:41:43,209 --> 00:41:43,714
No, no, no.

1338
00:41:43,714 --> 00:41:44,554
I'm not saying you're not.

1339
00:41:44,554 --> 00:41:44,764
I'm

1340
00:41:44,809 --> 00:41:46,114
saying I'm super transparent.

1341
00:41:46,114 --> 00:41:48,634
Like I will tell you what I
don't like, what I like, what

1342
00:41:48,634 --> 00:41:50,074
you can do, what you can't do.

1343
00:41:50,074 --> 00:41:51,244
Like I'm straight up.

1344
00:41:51,744 --> 00:41:58,034
But it depends on the woman, because there
are some single women when they come into

1345
00:41:58,034 --> 00:42:02,834
like the, the relationship or they're
just talking to a couple, they wanna

1346
00:42:02,834 --> 00:42:08,974
be super aggressive and do what I think
women don't like for other men to do.

1347
00:42:08,974 --> 00:42:13,814
But these single women will come out and
be like, oh, you're so, you're so sexy.

1348
00:42:13,814 --> 00:42:16,544
Oh my God, Adam, I just wanna
like ride that beard and whatever.

1349
00:42:16,639 --> 00:42:16,859
Ah.

1350
00:42:17,359 --> 00:42:17,599
Yeah,

1351
00:42:17,869 --> 00:42:19,429
you can say, that's my man all you want.

1352
00:42:19,549 --> 00:42:19,849
There you go.

1353
00:42:19,879 --> 00:42:20,899
I don't wanna see it in the group text.

1354
00:42:21,399 --> 00:42:21,759
Yeah.

1355
00:42:22,049 --> 00:42:25,119
So those are things for me,
like, hey, can, you can, yeah.

1356
00:42:25,119 --> 00:42:25,139
There's a

1357
00:42:25,604 --> 00:42:26,094
address.

1358
00:42:26,094 --> 00:42:28,169
So this is my problem is the
double standards of it all.

1359
00:42:28,349 --> 00:42:28,619
Oh, for

1360
00:42:28,619 --> 00:42:28,949
sure.

1361
00:42:29,399 --> 00:42:33,629
'cause we have friends who have
talked about women going up to their

1362
00:42:33,629 --> 00:42:38,159
husbands randomly and touching their
face or grabbing their dick when

1363
00:42:38,159 --> 00:42:39,629
they walk by, things like that.

1364
00:42:39,689 --> 00:42:39,869
Yeah.

1365
00:42:39,929 --> 00:42:40,889
Disrespectfully.

1366
00:42:40,919 --> 00:42:40,979
Yeah.

1367
00:42:41,519 --> 00:42:46,019
But unicorns or single women
are not labeled with the

1368
00:42:46,019 --> 00:42:48,209
negativity that single men are.

1369
00:42:48,839 --> 00:42:52,169
And I feel like there are single
women out that step outta line,

1370
00:42:52,169 --> 00:42:54,534
but there's just as much It's, it's both.

1371
00:42:54,534 --> 00:42:54,814
Yeah.

1372
00:42:54,819 --> 00:42:58,409
Because there's married
women that step outta line.

1373
00:42:58,559 --> 00:42:59,009
Yeah, that's true.

1374
00:42:59,099 --> 00:43:00,169
And it's like, yeah, no,

1375
00:43:00,229 --> 00:43:00,769
that's true.

1376
00:43:00,774 --> 00:43:01,154
So there's

1377
00:43:01,154 --> 00:43:04,609
a, so here we are, we're talking
about single men in the lifestyle

1378
00:43:04,609 --> 00:43:07,549
and how people say they're so
detrimental to the lifestyle.

1379
00:43:07,549 --> 00:43:09,859
You know, what's detrimental
to lifestyle people?

1380
00:43:10,574 --> 00:43:13,364
People who don't know how
to respect other people.

1381
00:43:13,454 --> 00:43:13,634
Yeah.

1382
00:43:13,784 --> 00:43:16,124
Their relationships and their boundaries.

1383
00:43:16,184 --> 00:43:16,334
Mm-hmm.

1384
00:43:16,394 --> 00:43:20,624
And this is why we talk about this all
the time, because it's about respect.

1385
00:43:20,954 --> 00:43:26,774
Uh, we have come we have come
with unicorns that have had to

1386
00:43:26,774 --> 00:43:31,334
been like, we've had unicorns
that needed to be put in check,

1387
00:43:31,334 --> 00:43:31,934
put in their place.

1388
00:43:31,994 --> 00:43:32,414
Oh, yeah,

1389
00:43:32,469 --> 00:43:32,799
Yeah.

1390
00:43:32,889 --> 00:43:34,329
More so than we have men.

1391
00:43:35,139 --> 00:43:35,409
Yeah.

1392
00:43:35,929 --> 00:43:42,009
The single guys that we've ever brought
into our bedroom have been so respectful.

1393
00:43:42,119 --> 00:43:45,059
That they still hit me up and
ask me how I'm doing to this day.

1394
00:43:45,299 --> 00:43:45,599
Yeah.

1395
00:43:45,629 --> 00:43:46,589
It's like, Hey man, how you doing?

1396
00:43:46,589 --> 00:43:49,409
So there was a, there was a path,
there was a path that we had to

1397
00:43:49,409 --> 00:43:52,929
walk to get to that point and to
get to know the men that we like.

1398
00:43:52,989 --> 00:43:57,749
Or that I like, I have
some from years ago.

1399
00:43:58,249 --> 00:43:59,239
Like years.

1400
00:43:59,509 --> 00:43:59,569
Yeah.

1401
00:43:59,629 --> 00:44:04,399
That still hit me up and are
like, man, that was awesome.

1402
00:44:04,449 --> 00:44:05,469
Do you think we could do that again?

1403
00:44:05,739 --> 00:44:06,039
Why?

1404
00:44:06,039 --> 00:44:08,019
Because we were both
very respectful to them.

1405
00:44:08,019 --> 00:44:08,079
Yeah.

1406
00:44:08,169 --> 00:44:09,459
And they were respectful to us.

1407
00:44:09,699 --> 00:44:10,059
Yeah.

1408
00:44:10,149 --> 00:44:13,869
And you know that that's, and that's
the big reason why I wanted to talk

1409
00:44:13,869 --> 00:44:18,819
about this today, because I feel for
the single guy in that they're given

1410
00:44:18,819 --> 00:44:20,604
the label that they're given mm-hmm.

1411
00:44:20,684 --> 00:44:21,729
This negative label.

1412
00:44:21,729 --> 00:44:22,119
Mm-hmm.

1413
00:44:22,779 --> 00:44:26,409
Um, I know that we have a lot of
new people that listen to our show.

1414
00:44:26,409 --> 00:44:29,079
A lot of people who are still
early on in their journey.

1415
00:44:29,649 --> 00:44:35,229
I just wanna, I wanna put this in your
head that, hey, not all single men should

1416
00:44:35,229 --> 00:44:38,409
be labeled with that negative connotation.

1417
00:44:38,679 --> 00:44:43,299
If you guys are looking to bring
in a guy into your bedroom, just

1418
00:44:43,299 --> 00:44:45,399
learn how to spot the red flags.

1419
00:44:45,399 --> 00:44:46,479
Know what it is.

1420
00:44:46,629 --> 00:44:46,719
Mm-hmm.

1421
00:44:46,959 --> 00:44:51,009
You don't want in a person know
that if they're even slightly

1422
00:44:51,009 --> 00:44:52,929
disrespectful, they gotta go.

1423
00:44:53,289 --> 00:44:54,759
I gotta add something to that.

1424
00:44:54,879 --> 00:44:56,019
If you're gonna bring.

1425
00:44:56,934 --> 00:45:02,454
Men that are in a couple, if you're going
to bring another man in, you don't have to

1426
00:45:02,454 --> 00:45:05,454
alpha it, you don't have to machismo it.

1427
00:45:05,874 --> 00:45:05,994
No.

1428
00:45:06,024 --> 00:45:08,264
Like, just be cool.

1429
00:45:08,294 --> 00:45:09,784
Let them know it.

1430
00:45:09,784 --> 00:45:10,984
It's they're not dumb.

1431
00:45:10,984 --> 00:45:15,624
Like if you talk to them like regular
humans and tell 'em your boundaries and

1432
00:45:15,624 --> 00:45:20,569
your rules, whatever y'all are bringing
them in for, they can comprehend it.

1433
00:45:20,719 --> 00:45:21,009
Yeah.

1434
00:45:21,009 --> 00:45:21,289
Yeah.

1435
00:45:21,479 --> 00:45:22,169
They comprehend it.

1436
00:45:22,169 --> 00:45:24,984
You know, most guys, you, you gotta
understand the single guy when

1437
00:45:24,984 --> 00:45:27,714
you go in, you're not the show.

1438
00:45:27,954 --> 00:45:29,124
You are not the show.

1439
00:45:29,154 --> 00:45:30,024
You're the toy.

1440
00:45:30,354 --> 00:45:30,774
Yes.

1441
00:45:31,369 --> 00:45:33,234
Do not get your feelings hurt.

1442
00:45:33,234 --> 00:45:33,829
You're the toy.

1443
00:45:33,849 --> 00:45:34,509
You are the,

1444
00:45:34,614 --> 00:45:38,894
and so we will show you the respect
of the fact that you are a person.

1445
00:45:39,164 --> 00:45:39,344
Yes.

1446
00:45:39,374 --> 00:45:40,544
And that you are.

1447
00:45:40,919 --> 00:45:42,089
Most likely a friend.

1448
00:45:42,119 --> 00:45:44,459
'cause if we're bringing
you in, we have to like you.

1449
00:45:44,464 --> 00:45:44,574
Mm-hmm.

1450
00:45:44,654 --> 00:45:45,419
We have to trust you.

1451
00:45:45,419 --> 00:45:46,679
We have to feel safe with you.

1452
00:45:46,734 --> 00:45:49,554
And so, we'll, by that time,
we consider you a friend.

1453
00:45:49,824 --> 00:45:50,964
We're gonna let you come in.

1454
00:45:51,474 --> 00:45:54,084
But you are not the star of the show.

1455
00:45:54,144 --> 00:45:54,354
No,

1456
00:45:55,104 --> 00:45:55,794
she is.

1457
00:45:56,394 --> 00:45:59,694
And you are there for her pleasure.

1458
00:45:59,724 --> 00:45:59,934
Yes.

1459
00:46:00,084 --> 00:46:02,034
Just the same as I'm
there for her pleasure.

1460
00:46:02,064 --> 00:46:03,234
Thank you for saying that.

1461
00:46:03,414 --> 00:46:03,924
It's true.

1462
00:46:03,984 --> 00:46:04,314
Yeah.

1463
00:46:04,434 --> 00:46:08,574
And I feel like that's the
case in most threesomes.

1464
00:46:08,754 --> 00:46:08,964
Yes.

1465
00:46:08,964 --> 00:46:10,344
Where they bring in a man

1466
00:46:10,524 --> 00:46:10,734
Yeah.

1467
00:46:10,794 --> 00:46:12,504
You're there for her pleasure.

1468
00:46:12,504 --> 00:46:12,594
Yes.

1469
00:46:12,594 --> 00:46:13,344
Unless, unless,

1470
00:46:13,344 --> 00:46:13,494
and

1471
00:46:13,974 --> 00:46:15,864
the men are bisexual, in which case, hey,

1472
00:46:16,254 --> 00:46:16,824
for all of y'all,

1473
00:46:16,824 --> 00:46:17,094
your thing.

1474
00:46:17,364 --> 00:46:17,514
Yeah.

1475
00:46:17,544 --> 00:46:19,614
And also that goes for, for women.

1476
00:46:20,154 --> 00:46:20,394
Yeah.

1477
00:46:20,574 --> 00:46:21,594
For unicorns.

1478
00:46:21,594 --> 00:46:24,234
If I'm bringing a single woman
in here, it's for me and her.

1479
00:46:24,384 --> 00:46:27,624
Like it's, it's mainly for me, but
it's like a fun for me and her.

1480
00:46:28,124 --> 00:46:28,939
Of course you're gonna have sex.

1481
00:46:28,939 --> 00:46:29,179
It's not

1482
00:46:29,179 --> 00:46:29,714
gonna be fun for me time.

1483
00:46:29,774 --> 00:46:31,184
Well, no, of course you are.

1484
00:46:31,184 --> 00:46:31,934
But I mean, you know what I'm saying?

1485
00:46:31,934 --> 00:46:33,704
Like it's more for us.

1486
00:46:33,884 --> 00:46:34,064
Yeah.

1487
00:46:34,364 --> 00:46:37,754
You know, it's a more for us
situation and we tell you that.

1488
00:46:37,759 --> 00:46:37,979
We'll

1489
00:46:37,979 --> 00:46:38,099
tell

1490
00:46:38,099 --> 00:46:38,339
you that.

1491
00:46:38,339 --> 00:46:38,349
Yeah.

1492
00:46:38,349 --> 00:46:41,354
So I mean, so for guys, you
don't, you don't have to go in

1493
00:46:41,354 --> 00:46:42,764
there with that alpha mentality.

1494
00:46:42,764 --> 00:46:42,824
No.

1495
00:46:42,854 --> 00:46:45,194
You don't have to go in there
and go, oh, I'm gonna fuck

1496
00:46:45,194 --> 00:46:46,244
you better than your husband.

1497
00:46:46,484 --> 00:46:49,334
Or, I'm gonna give you Dick so good
that you're gonna be crying for days,

1498
00:46:49,334 --> 00:46:52,184
or whatever the fuck you guys want
to say that make that pumps you up.

1499
00:46:52,694 --> 00:46:55,094
You don't have to do that
unless you're asked to.

1500
00:46:55,334 --> 00:46:55,574
Yeah.

1501
00:46:56,024 --> 00:46:59,114
If anything, go in and be an equal.

1502
00:46:59,354 --> 00:46:59,594
Yeah.

1503
00:47:00,044 --> 00:47:00,884
Just be an equal.

1504
00:47:00,884 --> 00:47:01,154
Yeah.

1505
00:47:01,454 --> 00:47:05,564
Just say, okay, what role do
you want me to play in this?

1506
00:47:05,699 --> 00:47:07,669
Because I'm down, you know?

1507
00:47:07,669 --> 00:47:07,869
Yeah.

1508
00:47:08,054 --> 00:47:10,664
And if there's something that maybe
crosses your boundaries, you say,

1509
00:47:10,664 --> 00:47:13,874
ah, well that right there, I don't
care for everything else is cool,

1510
00:47:13,874 --> 00:47:15,404
but eh, I could do without that.

1511
00:47:15,494 --> 00:47:15,584
Yeah.

1512
00:47:15,584 --> 00:47:15,974
You know what I mean?

1513
00:47:16,364 --> 00:47:19,274
Vocal lies what your boundaries are too.

1514
00:47:19,274 --> 00:47:23,924
Because even though you are being
brought in to this couple, and you may

1515
00:47:23,924 --> 00:47:25,634
really, really want this experience.

1516
00:47:26,384 --> 00:47:30,434
Don't compromise your boundaries
because you want that experience.

1517
00:47:30,589 --> 00:47:30,879
Yeah.

1518
00:47:31,004 --> 00:47:31,334
Yeah.

1519
00:47:31,424 --> 00:47:33,434
Uh, because that's not fair to you.

1520
00:47:33,584 --> 00:47:34,544
That's not fair to you.

1521
00:47:34,814 --> 00:47:35,114
Yeah.

1522
00:47:35,114 --> 00:47:38,534
You want to enjoy the experience, but you
don't want to compromise your boundaries

1523
00:47:38,534 --> 00:47:43,004
and do something that you don't wanna
do because the chick is really hot.

1524
00:47:43,424 --> 00:47:43,874
I don't,

1525
00:47:44,414 --> 00:47:45,494
I don't, I was just kidding.

1526
00:47:45,524 --> 00:47:50,314
Well, you know, that's, there was
a time in my lifestyle journey

1527
00:47:50,374 --> 00:47:52,414
where I would have very easily just

1528
00:47:52,414 --> 00:47:53,164
last year.

1529
00:47:53,314 --> 00:47:53,704
I'm just kidding.

1530
00:47:54,204 --> 00:47:55,734
I would say probably,

1531
00:47:56,064 --> 00:47:57,534
you don't have to get into that, but what?

1532
00:47:57,534 --> 00:47:57,924
No, no, no.

1533
00:47:57,924 --> 00:48:01,254
After, after, probably
after we stopped being poly.

1534
00:48:01,344 --> 00:48:01,554
Yeah.

1535
00:48:01,614 --> 00:48:02,799
And we reentered, you know?

1536
00:48:02,804 --> 00:48:02,874
Yeah.

1537
00:48:03,444 --> 00:48:04,854
Just the sexual portion of it.

1538
00:48:05,544 --> 00:48:06,954
That's really where I started going.

1539
00:48:06,984 --> 00:48:07,284
Okay.

1540
00:48:07,284 --> 00:48:10,314
You know what I've had my experiences.

1541
00:48:10,524 --> 00:48:10,704
Mm-hmm.

1542
00:48:11,274 --> 00:48:14,574
And I think I really need to find more.

1543
00:48:15,279 --> 00:48:17,319
Quality, then quantity.

1544
00:48:17,679 --> 00:48:19,689
And I can walk away from shit.

1545
00:48:19,689 --> 00:48:20,799
I can say no to shit.

1546
00:48:20,799 --> 00:48:20,889
Mm-hmm.

1547
00:48:21,129 --> 00:48:23,769
You know, I don't have to be so desperate.

1548
00:48:24,039 --> 00:48:24,429
Yeah.

1549
00:48:24,589 --> 00:48:28,219
And the moment I realized that I
don't have to be so desperate and

1550
00:48:28,219 --> 00:48:29,959
I can walk away from situations.

1551
00:48:30,019 --> 00:48:30,289
Yeah.

1552
00:48:30,289 --> 00:48:30,299
Yeah.

1553
00:48:30,409 --> 00:48:33,229
That's really where I started
seeing better situations arrive.

1554
00:48:33,679 --> 00:48:34,339
That's awesome.

1555
00:48:34,339 --> 00:48:35,034
Which is pretty cool.

1556
00:48:35,034 --> 00:48:35,554
That's cool.

1557
00:48:35,664 --> 00:48:35,954
Yeah.

1558
00:48:36,054 --> 00:48:40,049
And I think it's a confidence thing
because when you feel like you are

1559
00:48:40,049 --> 00:48:43,799
willing to do anything to sleep with
somebody, I think it comes out, I

1560
00:48:43,799 --> 00:48:45,509
think it, it appears in your, it

1561
00:48:45,674 --> 00:48:45,794
does

1562
00:48:46,049 --> 00:48:47,099
in your personality.

1563
00:48:47,099 --> 00:48:47,189
Yes.

1564
00:48:47,189 --> 00:48:48,509
It's a certain desperation.

1565
00:48:48,719 --> 00:48:51,479
It's almost like a drop
of blood in the sea.

1566
00:48:51,689 --> 00:48:55,529
The sharks come around, they can
smell it in their little gills.

1567
00:48:55,859 --> 00:48:56,729
Like, it's, it's automatic.

1568
00:48:56,759 --> 00:49:01,859
And I think women, they can sense
even the slightest bit of thirstiness.

1569
00:49:02,249 --> 00:49:03,059
Oh God, yes.

1570
00:49:03,059 --> 00:49:03,119
They

1571
00:49:03,119 --> 00:49:04,439
can, they can sense it out.

1572
00:49:04,444 --> 00:49:04,674
You can just

1573
00:49:04,874 --> 00:49:04,914
possible.

1574
00:49:04,914 --> 00:49:05,009
I mean, and

1575
00:49:05,009 --> 00:49:05,794
some women like that.

1576
00:49:06,029 --> 00:49:07,979
Some women want like the thirsty men.

1577
00:49:08,319 --> 00:49:09,429
I don't mind.

1578
00:49:10,419 --> 00:49:15,639
Portraying to an extent, a little
bit of thirst if that's what,

1579
00:49:16,089 --> 00:49:17,619
you know, I like to feel wanted.

1580
00:49:17,799 --> 00:49:18,129
Yeah.

1581
00:49:18,249 --> 00:49:25,419
And so I don't mind portraying that for
somebody if it makes them feel sexier.

1582
00:49:25,629 --> 00:49:25,899
Yeah.

1583
00:49:25,959 --> 00:49:28,479
If it makes them feel more into it.

1584
00:49:28,599 --> 00:49:28,899
Yeah.

1585
00:49:29,019 --> 00:49:29,439
Fuck yeah.

1586
00:49:29,439 --> 00:49:30,099
I can do that.

1587
00:49:30,339 --> 00:49:30,609
Yeah.

1588
00:49:30,679 --> 00:49:32,359
Because I, I like it myself.

1589
00:49:32,599 --> 00:49:32,809
Yeah.

1590
00:49:33,049 --> 00:49:40,539
Uh, but there's a difference between I
guess, expressing want and being thirsty.

1591
00:49:41,139 --> 00:49:41,409
Yeah.

1592
00:49:41,709 --> 00:49:42,819
And it's nonstop.

1593
00:49:42,824 --> 00:49:46,119
It it to the point to where you can't even
have a regular conversation with somebody.

1594
00:49:46,389 --> 00:49:47,529
It's all sex.

1595
00:49:47,534 --> 00:49:47,694
Yeah.

1596
00:49:47,884 --> 00:49:48,934
It's all looks Oh my gosh.

1597
00:49:48,954 --> 00:49:50,289
And I know, you know
what I'm talking about.

1598
00:49:50,289 --> 00:49:51,969
'cause I've seen the
conversations on deck.

1599
00:49:52,299 --> 00:49:52,899
I do not like that.

1600
00:49:53,009 --> 00:49:53,219
Yeah.

1601
00:49:53,219 --> 00:49:55,829
It's, it's like, it's
almost like you'll start.

1602
00:49:56,329 --> 00:49:59,689
I've seen you, you've been like, oh yeah,
so and so messaged me and I, you know,

1603
00:49:59,689 --> 00:50:02,929
I might be kind of interested, so I'm
gonna see how these conversations go and

1604
00:50:02,929 --> 00:50:04,729
like, the first conversation will be okay.

1605
00:50:05,209 --> 00:50:08,109
And then the sex starts coming
in on the second conversation.

1606
00:50:08,709 --> 00:50:10,779
And then before you
know what, it's all sex.

1607
00:50:10,779 --> 00:50:10,789
Mm-hmm.

1608
00:50:11,439 --> 00:50:13,089
And it's all, oh God, you're so hot.

1609
00:50:13,299 --> 00:50:13,389
Mm-hmm.

1610
00:50:13,539 --> 00:50:14,599
Oh God, I want you so bad.

1611
00:50:14,599 --> 00:50:14,814
Mm-hmm.

1612
00:50:15,099 --> 00:50:17,919
And there's no substance to
the conversation whatsoever.

1613
00:50:18,039 --> 00:50:18,639
And that's it.

1614
00:50:18,699 --> 00:50:21,879
You know what's funny is I've
gotten conversations like that too.

1615
00:50:22,209 --> 00:50:22,449
Yeah.

1616
00:50:22,869 --> 00:50:26,199
The moment that there's nothing
but sex and no substance.

1617
00:50:26,199 --> 00:50:27,489
You, you've told me that, you're like,

1618
00:50:27,489 --> 00:50:28,239
I lose, I lose.

1619
00:50:28,239 --> 00:50:30,069
You're like, she's too thirsty.

1620
00:50:30,099 --> 00:50:30,909
I'm not interested.

1621
00:50:31,269 --> 00:50:31,539
Yeah.

1622
00:50:31,539 --> 00:50:32,229
Not interested.

1623
00:50:32,259 --> 00:50:32,469
Yeah.

1624
00:50:32,709 --> 00:50:33,639
I wanna know that,

1625
00:50:33,639 --> 00:50:34,989
you know what I think it is?

1626
00:50:34,989 --> 00:50:35,049
Hmm.

1627
00:50:35,409 --> 00:50:40,779
I think some women like that for more
than, um, for more than just a compliment.

1628
00:50:40,779 --> 00:50:42,099
Like they get off to it.

1629
00:50:42,969 --> 00:50:43,389
How's that?

1630
00:50:43,579 --> 00:50:44,449
Ooh, you like that?

1631
00:50:44,449 --> 00:50:45,499
Oh, you think I'm sexy?

1632
00:50:45,679 --> 00:50:45,979
Yeah.

1633
00:50:46,369 --> 00:50:47,659
Oh, you know what?

1634
00:50:47,659 --> 00:50:49,009
Yeah, you may be right.

1635
00:50:49,009 --> 00:50:49,069
Yeah.

1636
00:50:49,099 --> 00:50:52,009
So I, I don't know if you remember
this, but back in, in our hometown,

1637
00:50:52,429 --> 00:50:55,999
there was this girl and she was
talking to both of us for a while.

1638
00:50:55,999 --> 00:50:56,779
She was from my past.

1639
00:50:56,779 --> 00:51:00,049
She was talking to both of us
for a little while when you moved

1640
00:51:00,319 --> 00:51:00,349
Uhhuh.

1641
00:51:00,559 --> 00:51:06,259
And I was like finishing up back at
home and she would message, remember,

1642
00:51:06,259 --> 00:51:09,979
I would tell you, she was the first one
that would message me and she'd be like,

1643
00:51:09,979 --> 00:51:11,659
yeah, you like that fat pussy, don't you?

1644
00:51:11,659 --> 00:51:12,379
Oh, yeah.

1645
00:51:12,379 --> 00:51:12,679
Remember?

1646
00:51:12,684 --> 00:51:13,069
Oh, yes.

1647
00:51:13,069 --> 00:51:16,039
Anyways, that same, uh, I wanted to make
sure you knew who I was talking about,

1648
00:51:16,039 --> 00:51:20,789
but she used to always message me with, do
want me, like, what do you want about me?

1649
00:51:20,939 --> 00:51:21,059
Yeah.

1650
00:51:21,059 --> 00:51:22,224
What is it about me that you want?

1651
00:51:22,344 --> 00:51:23,124
It was constant.

1652
00:51:23,124 --> 00:51:23,574
Constant.

1653
00:51:23,574 --> 00:51:23,814
Yeah.

1654
00:51:24,084 --> 00:51:27,894
You know, I couldn't just give a
compliment or I couldn't just say, yeah.

1655
00:51:27,894 --> 00:51:29,334
You know, I, I'd tap that.

1656
00:51:29,424 --> 00:51:32,304
Well, what, what is it about me
that, that you want Like what?

1657
00:51:32,304 --> 00:51:32,364
The

1658
00:51:32,454 --> 00:51:32,964
fluffiness

1659
00:51:33,114 --> 00:51:33,324
Yeah.

1660
00:51:33,324 --> 00:51:34,674
It and it was constant.

1661
00:51:34,819 --> 00:51:35,874
So that's constant.

1662
00:51:35,934 --> 00:51:36,924
That's the fluffiness.

1663
00:51:36,924 --> 00:51:38,394
It's like, God, really?

1664
00:51:38,394 --> 00:51:38,964
You gotta do that.

1665
00:51:38,964 --> 00:51:39,624
You gotta be like that.

1666
00:51:39,774 --> 00:51:43,104
I gotta fucking, and, and then before
you know it, it's not genuine anymore.

1667
00:51:43,164 --> 00:51:43,344
Yeah.

1668
00:51:43,434 --> 00:51:47,754
After that, you're fishing for
compliments so much that whatever I

1669
00:51:47,754 --> 00:51:49,764
give you, it's not genuine anymore.

1670
00:51:49,764 --> 00:51:51,384
And bam, I've lost interest.

1671
00:51:51,389 --> 00:51:51,559
That's it.

1672
00:51:51,559 --> 00:51:51,759
Yeah.

1673
00:51:51,759 --> 00:51:53,784
You, that's too much work.

1674
00:51:54,264 --> 00:51:59,904
If, if, if I have to be disingenuous
when I talk to you, I'm not interested.

1675
00:52:00,424 --> 00:52:03,874
If I can give you a compliment
and it's a genuine compliment.

1676
00:52:03,879 --> 00:52:04,099
Yeah.

1677
00:52:04,444 --> 00:52:08,314
And some people can't take compliments,
but they say, so I get that.

1678
00:52:08,314 --> 00:52:08,854
I understand.

1679
00:52:08,914 --> 00:52:09,214
Yeah.

1680
00:52:09,724 --> 00:52:12,354
But if you're gonna continue
after that compliment for more,

1681
00:52:12,414 --> 00:52:15,164
you're gonna keep on, nah, sorry.

1682
00:52:16,049 --> 00:52:16,829
I, I can't.

1683
00:52:17,339 --> 00:52:17,759
You gotta,

1684
00:52:18,209 --> 00:52:20,009
do you ever get those women
where they send you one

1685
00:52:20,009 --> 00:52:21,689
picture, like in the day, right.

1686
00:52:21,689 --> 00:52:24,839
They send you one picture and they're like
sitting down by their desk or whatever.

1687
00:52:24,839 --> 00:52:25,109
Right?

1688
00:52:25,499 --> 00:52:27,269
And then you're like, oh
yeah, that, that looks hot.

1689
00:52:27,839 --> 00:52:31,609
And then they send you another picture
later on in the day and they're like,

1690
00:52:32,539 --> 00:52:36,799
I don't know, watching TV and they
send you another picture later on

1691
00:52:36,799 --> 00:52:40,489
in the day and they're just doing
something else the way I do to you.

1692
00:52:40,579 --> 00:52:40,879
Yeah.

1693
00:52:41,629 --> 00:52:42,679
Do you get that a lot?

1694
00:52:43,229 --> 00:52:43,449
No.

1695
00:52:43,474 --> 00:52:44,584
I remember you used to.

1696
00:52:45,544 --> 00:52:46,264
I used to.

1697
00:52:46,324 --> 00:52:46,504
Yeah.

1698
00:52:46,594 --> 00:52:46,744
Certain.

1699
00:52:46,744 --> 00:52:49,054
'cause they always wanted
you to fucking compliment.

1700
00:52:49,294 --> 00:52:49,924
That's true.

1701
00:52:49,924 --> 00:52:53,374
And you know, I ran into this a lot
and you know this when we were poly.

1702
00:52:53,494 --> 00:52:53,734
Yeah.

1703
00:52:54,034 --> 00:53:00,034
I ran into a lot of women that would
use me to make themselves feel better.

1704
00:53:00,034 --> 00:53:00,514
Oh, yeah.

1705
00:53:00,574 --> 00:53:01,414
When they needed it.

1706
00:53:01,419 --> 00:53:01,549
Yeah.

1707
00:53:01,564 --> 00:53:03,154
And I think I still run into that now.

1708
00:53:03,154 --> 00:53:04,924
I'm like, we've had some friends recently.

1709
00:53:05,014 --> 00:53:05,109
Oh, I'm sure.

1710
00:53:05,114 --> 00:53:05,284
Yeah.

1711
00:53:05,374 --> 00:53:07,114
That would message me all the time.

1712
00:53:07,444 --> 00:53:07,684
Mm-hmm.

1713
00:53:08,164 --> 00:53:11,044
Uh, and it was for their own benefit.

1714
00:53:11,254 --> 00:53:11,464
Yeah.

1715
00:53:11,704 --> 00:53:14,584
When they wanted to feel better about
themselves, they would message me.

1716
00:53:14,584 --> 00:53:14,644
Yeah.

1717
00:53:15,064 --> 00:53:19,504
And when they had something
better, they would ghost.

1718
00:53:19,564 --> 00:53:20,014
Yay.

1719
00:53:20,014 --> 00:53:21,934
They're not friends anymore.

1720
00:53:21,959 --> 00:53:22,249
Yeah.

1721
00:53:22,684 --> 00:53:22,954
Yeah.

1722
00:53:23,254 --> 00:53:25,234
You know, I mean, that's,
that's how it would go.

1723
00:53:25,234 --> 00:53:28,244
They would just disappear
when it didn't benefit them.

1724
00:53:28,394 --> 00:53:29,984
I just posted something about that.

1725
00:53:30,284 --> 00:53:30,354
You did.

1726
00:53:30,354 --> 00:53:30,374
I don't

1727
00:53:30,374 --> 00:53:33,044
know how we gotta this conversation, but
I just posted something about that I was

1728
00:53:33,044 --> 00:53:36,574
in the car with, with our daughter and
I was like, I don't need any validation.

1729
00:53:36,964 --> 00:53:38,374
Like when I post a picture.

1730
00:53:38,584 --> 00:53:38,764
Yeah.

1731
00:53:39,004 --> 00:53:41,614
I'll post a sexy picture
for my, for you to see.

1732
00:53:41,794 --> 00:53:41,884
Right.

1733
00:53:41,944 --> 00:53:44,704
Or you'll be like, I send it to you
first and you'll be like, post that.

1734
00:53:45,004 --> 00:53:45,064
Yeah.

1735
00:53:45,064 --> 00:53:51,514
And I'll post it and tag me, but I
don't post on groups for compliments

1736
00:53:51,514 --> 00:53:53,764
or validation or anything like.

1737
00:53:54,264 --> 00:53:55,584
I know I'm pretty

1738
00:53:55,884 --> 00:53:55,974
mm-hmm.

1739
00:53:56,184 --> 00:53:57,444
I know I'm hot.

1740
00:53:57,714 --> 00:54:02,154
I know I'm wanted because my husband
thinks I'm hot because my husband thinks

1741
00:54:02,154 --> 00:54:04,104
I'm pretty and my husband always wants me.

1742
00:54:04,404 --> 00:54:04,674
Right.

1743
00:54:04,884 --> 00:54:06,714
So like, that's my world right there.

1744
00:54:06,894 --> 00:54:07,164
Yeah.

1745
00:54:07,914 --> 00:54:10,704
But I don't do it for like compliments.

1746
00:54:11,364 --> 00:54:17,874
If I do, it's, if I send a sexy picture to
like a guy or something, it's not for them

1747
00:54:17,874 --> 00:54:19,734
to be like, Ooh, you're so fucking hot.

1748
00:54:20,004 --> 00:54:22,164
It's for just for them to admire it.

1749
00:54:22,554 --> 00:54:22,734
Yeah.

1750
00:54:22,794 --> 00:54:23,994
I don't need a compliment back.

1751
00:54:24,114 --> 00:54:24,384
Right.

1752
00:54:24,384 --> 00:54:26,184
Like, I tell my friends, I'm
like, you don't have to say I'm

1753
00:54:26,184 --> 00:54:29,154
sexy here, go do your business.

1754
00:54:29,544 --> 00:54:30,114
You know what I mean?

1755
00:54:30,114 --> 00:54:30,294
Like,

1756
00:54:30,684 --> 00:54:31,014
yeah.

1757
00:54:31,074 --> 00:54:32,154
I don't need the compliments.

1758
00:54:32,154 --> 00:54:32,604
It's not my, yeah.

1759
00:54:32,754 --> 00:54:33,384
It's not my thing.

1760
00:54:33,384 --> 00:54:34,614
And it's not that I don't accept 'em.

1761
00:54:34,614 --> 00:54:35,604
I appreciate them.

1762
00:54:35,634 --> 00:54:39,444
I just do not need, I'm not a
girl, a lady that's gonna be

1763
00:54:39,444 --> 00:54:40,494
sending you pictures, just like

1764
00:54:41,004 --> 00:54:45,294
there's women out there who maybe
they don't get it from home and

1765
00:54:45,294 --> 00:54:48,009
maybe they do get it home, but
prefer not to get it from home.

1766
00:54:48,714 --> 00:54:51,444
And so they get that
validation from other people.

1767
00:54:51,444 --> 00:54:51,454
Yeah.

1768
00:54:51,954 --> 00:54:56,574
And it's all good until they find that
validation from somebody they consider

1769
00:54:56,574 --> 00:54:58,524
better and then they drop the person.

1770
00:54:58,614 --> 00:54:59,004
Yeah.

1771
00:54:59,424 --> 00:55:02,784
But then when they don't get the attention
from that other person, then they're

1772
00:55:02,784 --> 00:55:03,929
like, well, I know I can turn to this

1773
00:55:03,929 --> 00:55:04,089
person.

1774
00:55:04,159 --> 00:55:07,464
Well, you, you kind, you kind of
had that with the lady and the

1775
00:55:07,464 --> 00:55:11,364
husband where she think where
the husband pretty contacted me.

1776
00:55:11,484 --> 00:55:11,754
Oh yeah.

1777
00:55:11,844 --> 00:55:16,134
And the husband pretty much
was like thinking that you,

1778
00:55:16,314 --> 00:55:17,784
that she just liked you better.

1779
00:55:18,144 --> 00:55:19,104
Like his wife.

1780
00:55:19,314 --> 00:55:19,374
Yeah.

1781
00:55:19,374 --> 00:55:21,564
His wife just liked you way better.

1782
00:55:21,624 --> 00:55:22,914
And maybe that was the case.

1783
00:55:22,914 --> 00:55:23,754
I think that was the case.

1784
00:55:23,754 --> 00:55:24,504
That might have been the case.

1785
00:55:24,504 --> 00:55:24,804
Yeah.

1786
00:55:24,804 --> 00:55:27,684
So that has come up.

1787
00:55:27,764 --> 00:55:29,709
I don't know how we, how
we got to this part of it.

1788
00:55:29,709 --> 00:55:29,799
Yeah.

1789
00:55:29,949 --> 00:55:31,449
Because we were talking about single guys.

1790
00:55:31,449 --> 00:55:34,749
But it just goes to show
you that, and like I said.

1791
00:55:35,244 --> 00:55:39,544
Yeah, it started off as single guys, but
yeah, we went around in the entire circle.

1792
00:55:39,574 --> 00:55:39,664
Mm-hmm.

1793
00:55:40,024 --> 00:55:44,884
Because as you can see, it isn't
just single guys, it's single women.

1794
00:55:44,889 --> 00:55:45,169
Mm-hmm.

1795
00:55:45,574 --> 00:55:47,074
It's married guys.

1796
00:55:47,079 --> 00:55:47,289
Mm-hmm.

1797
00:55:47,674 --> 00:55:48,514
It's married women.

1798
00:55:49,014 --> 00:55:54,584
You either respect and give consent
and get consent, or you don't, mm-hmm.

1799
00:55:54,764 --> 00:55:57,449
And it doesn't matter what walk
of life you're in, it doesn't

1800
00:55:57,449 --> 00:55:59,879
matter if you're married, it
doesn't matter if you're single.

1801
00:56:00,379 --> 00:56:01,519
You're either respectful or you're not.

1802
00:56:02,019 --> 00:56:02,679
Be respectful.

1803
00:56:03,309 --> 00:56:04,569
Be respectful peoples.

1804
00:56:04,569 --> 00:56:05,319
Be respectful.

1805
00:56:05,324 --> 00:56:05,414
Mm-hmm.

1806
00:56:05,494 --> 00:56:09,249
And also keep, keep an open mind to,
to a lot of respectful single guys.

1807
00:56:09,399 --> 00:56:10,629
So that's our show for today.

1808
00:56:10,659 --> 00:56:12,069
Thanks for hanging with us this week.

1809
00:56:12,219 --> 00:56:17,469
If you loved it, make sure to like,
subscribe, share, and leave us a review.

1810
00:56:18,279 --> 00:56:20,919
'cause it seriously helps us grow
and it keeps this conversation going.

1811
00:56:21,419 --> 00:56:27,509
You can find everything beyond monogamy
at www.beyondmonogamy.com, including our

1812
00:56:27,509 --> 00:56:33,119
Beyond Monogamy Confessional, our blog
posts, merch, and all of the juicy extras.

1813
00:56:33,329 --> 00:56:36,539
And don't forget to check out our
events tabs on our website for details

1814
00:56:36,539 --> 00:56:41,429
of upcoming Beyond Monogamy events, or
even just where we may be hanging out

1815
00:56:41,579 --> 00:56:43,079
in case you wanna come and join us.

1816
00:56:44,009 --> 00:56:44,429
Yes?

1817
00:56:44,429 --> 00:56:44,519
Yes.

1818
00:56:45,019 --> 00:56:49,169
We do have an event coming up we
have a Texas Desire Hotel takeover.

1819
00:56:49,169 --> 00:56:51,239
There still are tickets on that.

1820
00:56:51,449 --> 00:56:55,229
Yeah, there's uh, last I checked, I
believe there's like five rooms left.

1821
00:56:55,259 --> 00:56:55,619
Yeah.

1822
00:56:55,619 --> 00:56:58,679
So, um, and uh, that's
the weekend of April 11th.

1823
00:56:58,679 --> 00:57:01,049
Yeah, it's the Texas
Desires Hotel takeover.

1824
00:57:01,049 --> 00:57:01,079
I

1825
00:57:01,079 --> 00:57:02,639
believe Day passes are gone.

1826
00:57:02,729 --> 00:57:04,349
Day passes are gone, yeah.

1827
00:57:04,349 --> 00:57:04,359
Yeah.

1828
00:57:04,539 --> 00:57:07,089
But like I said, there are
still like five rooms available.

1829
00:57:07,089 --> 00:57:08,619
I think some people had dropped out.

1830
00:57:08,619 --> 00:57:14,139
So there is still a chance to reserve
your room, uh, if you're interested.

1831
00:57:14,679 --> 00:57:16,384
Remember it's the weekend of April.

1832
00:57:16,389 --> 00:57:17,349
April at 11th.

1833
00:57:17,619 --> 00:57:18,249
April 11th.

1834
00:57:18,249 --> 00:57:18,369
Okay.

1835
00:57:18,429 --> 00:57:20,919
Uh, we are doing a live show from
it, so if you want to hang out with

1836
00:57:20,919 --> 00:57:24,189
us, you wanna hear a show live along
with so many other cool things that

1837
00:57:24,189 --> 00:57:26,319
the hotel takeover, check that out.

1838
00:57:26,319 --> 00:57:27,759
It's on our, our website.

1839
00:57:27,759 --> 00:57:29,139
You have it in the events tabs.

1840
00:57:29,139 --> 00:57:31,299
We have all the information
in the events tab.

1841
00:57:31,299 --> 00:57:32,379
So go in there.

1842
00:57:32,799 --> 00:57:35,589
Come out if you can
come and show some love.

1843
00:57:35,589 --> 00:57:37,059
It's a really great venue.

1844
00:57:37,419 --> 00:57:39,279
Um, we had a lot of fun last year.

1845
00:57:39,399 --> 00:57:40,779
Yeah, we'll have our merch there.

1846
00:57:40,779 --> 00:57:44,099
We'll have we'll also have
a themed room, so that's be,

1847
00:57:44,129 --> 00:57:46,724
we will also have a fun, fun,
uh, just to let you know.

1848
00:57:46,724 --> 00:57:51,244
Also, uh, if it wasn't mentioned
before, we're also streaming every

1849
00:57:51,244 --> 00:57:55,384
Thursday on full swap radio.com
at 2:00 PM and 7:00 PM Central.

1850
00:57:55,384 --> 00:57:56,914
So be sure and tune in.

1851
00:57:57,064 --> 00:57:58,744
Uh, show us some love over there too.

1852
00:57:58,744 --> 00:58:01,114
And scope out all the other
podcasts that are on there.

1853
00:58:01,114 --> 00:58:01,684
It's really cool.

1854
00:58:01,684 --> 00:58:05,494
Yes, uh, as always, thanks for listening
and we will see you guys next week.

1855
00:58:05,974 --> 00:58:06,784
Bye.