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Alright y'all, before we
dive in, a quick heads up.

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This show is raw, real, and
definitely not rated pg.

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We're talking about adult themes, sexual
content, and the kind of stuff you

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probably don't want blasting through your
speakers at work or around your kits.

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So grab some headphones, pour your
drink of choice and get comfy.

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Oh, and just so we're clear, we are not
licensed therapists, counselors, or sex.

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Couches.

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Sex coaches.

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Sex coaches, not sex couches

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or just a couple of people sharing our
lives, experiences and sexy adventures.

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An ethical non-monogamy.

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So with that, pull up a
chair and enjoy the show.

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And.

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Hello, and welcome to another
episode of Beyond Monogamy.

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I'm Adam.

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And I'm Pris.

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And on today's Wednesday quickie,
we are going to be talking about

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holiday triggers in the lifestyle.

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Oh, you know what?

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You love it.

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You feel it?

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Oh, we've done it.

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Why does December bring
out just everyone's stuff?

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Oh, it's the first week of December.

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And you know what that means?

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It means that we're all broke.

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You should have worn like
a little Christmas hat.

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What?

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I don't have a Christmas hat.

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Ooh, I have elf ears.

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Next one.

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You are my Christmas hat.

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I will be.

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Oh my goodness.

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Yeah.

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So, you know, I was thinking mm-hmm.

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I've been thinking, I've been thinking you
know, we just got back from an awesome.

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Thanksgiving.

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Seattle trip?

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Yes.

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Visiting our daughter as, yes.

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If you can see this, if
you can see on the tv.

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It is a coffee cup.

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It is coffee cup with the, it's spilled.

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And it's spilled.

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Yeah.

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The spillage is brown and it's Seattle's
background, but their water isn't brown.

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No, no.

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It's very clean.

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Very clean guys.

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A beautiful shirt and a
wonderful memorabilia for a

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wonderful trip in Seattle.

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We had a great time.

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We did.

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Um, but you know, that's the
problem with the holidays.

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And I, I say this because Thanksgiving
and Christmas, there's not a

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whole lot of time in between.

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No.

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And we tend to drop money
at Thanksgiving time.

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Yes.

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And of course we're dropping
money at Christmas time.

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Anybody whose parents, anybody
who's, who's got anybody in

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significant in their lives Yes.

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Uh, knows that you're gonna
drop money at Christmas time.

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Yes.

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And so that means the weeks in
between Thanksgiving and Christmas

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are literally broke weeks.

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They're the most stressful weeks ever.

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Yeah.

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You've been pretty stressed.

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I had a friend of mine reach out to
me and they were like, is Pris okay?

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No, she's been, she's been, uh, posting
some kind of negative stuff is okay.

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Oh, you don't to tell me
which spread that was.

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Yeah, of course.

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Yeah.

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But, you know, it's like, uh, you
know, they're, they're worried that,

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uh, you know, you're, you're stressed
and, and we all know you're stressed.

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Everyone should know that I am stressed.

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Everybody's stressing, but yeah,
you're stressed and, and you know, yes.

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A lot of the primary portion
of your stress, or always for

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the most part is finances.

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Yes.

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Finances.

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You know, it, it's expensive to live Yes.

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As a person.

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It's expensive to live as a couple.

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It's expensive to live as a family.

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And we have a very expensive family.

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You know, I, I get Yeah.

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We don't, you know, our kids are really
good, so they don't really ask for much.

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Yeah.

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But yeah, we have a lot
of, a lot of stress.

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Yes.

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It's a lot of, it's a
lot of, a lot of stress.

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It happens.

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It happens and it happens.

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And you know, those of you listening,
I guarantee you, nine outta 10 of

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y'all are feeling the same crunch, the
same stress that we have, and you're

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trying to enjoy yourself at lifestyle
events and you're going, God, another

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event that's gonna cost us money.

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Yeah.

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You know for sure.

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It's difficult.

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It's difficult when you don't
have a whole lot of money.

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You know, there's a lot of people
that were just coming off of catching

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up from a government shutdown.

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Mm-hmm.

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The longest one that we've ever had.

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There's a lot of people who already
are struggling with finances.

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And notice that the economy is
everything is expensive, dude.

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Everything is expensive.

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I work in a world of finance.

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Yeah.

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So I work for.

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A finance advisor, and let me tell you
that it is, it's hard to be around people

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who don't have to stress about money.

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Now, I'm not saying that,
there's not that stress.

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I'm sure there is, but it's a hard.

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It's a hard situation.

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It's a hard knock life,
I'll tell you that.

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I Yeah, yeah.

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No, it, you know, and it, and
that's because we are in a better

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situation than many, than most.

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Yeah.

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And, than a lot Yeah, for sure.

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Than a lot of people out, out there.

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But, you know, it's a struggle
just like anybody else.

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And, and the reason why I bring this
up is because, uh, you know, you

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and I, we have an amazing sex life.

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Yes.

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And I'm not convincing myself.

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That's fact.

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That is actual fact.

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We have a great sex life.

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Yes.

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On average.

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Yes.

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Usually yes.

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We are banging it out at least
a minimum of one time a day.

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Yes.

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Sometimes up to four times a day.

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And on a day that neither
one of us has work.

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Way more than that.

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Yes.

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But what I notice is.

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Yes.

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When we are stressed or when
you are stressed or when it's

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hard times, my libido is gone.

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Your libido is gone.

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Gone.

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It has packed up the bags.

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It's gone and it has left for the winter.

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Yes, and and it's temporary.

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I know it's temporary.

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There was a time when early on in our
relationship, actually for several

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years in our relationship, we would
quote unquote fuck the stress away.

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Yes.

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Do you remember that?

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I do.

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To do that.

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And that works.

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Sometimes that works.

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Sometimes every now and then, whenever
we're like, it's gonna spill over,

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it's like, okay, just bang it out.

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No.

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Um, and it's really, I wouldn't say
now, even now, it's even more than that.

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I don't wanna see, I don't wanna
know, like the group text, I don't,

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if they're spicy, I ignore 'em.

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Yeah, people have.

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Message me have text me and they
wanna be all nice and spicy,

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and I straight out tell them I'm
so sorry, I am not in the mood.

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Yeah.

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I'm sure.

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Period.

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Yeah.

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And then they change it, right?

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Because they're friends and they
change their tactics and they change

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what they're talking to me about.

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Yeah.

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No, it is gone.

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Yeah.

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Well, you know, get packed
up for winter, baby Stress.

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Stress really removes any
kind of thought of sex.

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Yes.

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You know?

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And that's because our
lives revolve around sex.

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It does.

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Not only in our personal lives, no.

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But obviously in our professional
lives with the podcast and everything.

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I have an OnlyFans.

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This is what we, you have an OnlyFans.

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Yeah.

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And, you know, we we're, we're
constantly, you know, we're, we're

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making content and stuff like that.

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Mm-hmm.

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And you are very submissive to me as Yes.

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As you have said in, in several
different podcasts previous.

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How's that going?

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You know, I'm sure that I could
get it if I really wanted it.

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Yeah.

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But I'll tell you this, sometimes when
you are going through heavy stress, yeah.

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I'm normally the balance.

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I'm normally the calm.

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Yes.

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But I do not feel sexy.

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At all.

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Yeah.

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During this, this, uh, stressful times.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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You know, I just don't feel it.

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I don't feel it.

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And that's because you know, I
masturbate a lot throughout the day.

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My numbers are low.

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That's good to know.

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My numbers are low.

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See?

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And like that I don't really care.

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Yeah.

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Like, not, like, not necessary.

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No, no, no, no.

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Jesus.

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No.

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Like, uh, like, good for you.

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00:07:56,292 --> 00:07:59,232
Not like I don't really care,
but like, it's a podcast.

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We're talking about it.

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I don't really care.

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Go fuck yourself.

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That's what you did.

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00:08:02,862 --> 00:08:03,522
Pretty much.

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00:08:04,032 --> 00:08:04,992
Um, no.

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00:08:05,272 --> 00:08:08,302
You have to care because we're
talking about our sex lives.

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00:08:08,572 --> 00:08:14,002
On this show, so thanks so much for, oh
my God, for just throwing it out there.

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Oh, that was so funny.

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I know that you're my husband
and all, but whatever.

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00:08:19,072 --> 00:08:19,522
Whatever.

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00:08:19,522 --> 00:08:20,212
You asshole.

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00:08:20,272 --> 00:08:21,052
I don't really care.

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I'm worried about finances.

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Hey, lemme tell you something.

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Okay.

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I worry about them finances too.

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That was so funny.

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Oh, I'm glad.

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I'm glad.

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I'm glad.

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00:08:30,977 --> 00:08:33,482
I mean, I will say yes,
but there's other ways.

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00:08:33,482 --> 00:08:34,482
I did a quick TikTok today.

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00:08:35,072 --> 00:08:36,572
And it's like, it's okay.

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00:08:36,572 --> 00:08:39,512
It's okay if you're not
feeling it, remind each other.

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00:08:39,932 --> 00:08:43,077
So I liked that little TikTok that
you did because it was good, because

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00:08:43,382 --> 00:08:45,872
what you said in that TikTok.

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00:08:45,902 --> 00:08:48,152
And can you, would you mind
paraphrasing it real quick?

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Yeah.

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So what I said was, I can be very cold
and I'm so sorry, I'm already gonna cry.

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Oh, here we go.

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I'm very cold when it
comes to like stress.

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Like I can be very cold, very.

259
00:09:02,702 --> 00:09:03,002
Push.

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00:09:03,002 --> 00:09:04,802
You push standoffish, push everyone away.

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00:09:04,807 --> 00:09:05,047
Yeah.

262
00:09:05,052 --> 00:09:05,192
Yeah.

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00:09:05,192 --> 00:09:09,842
Like I go inside myself, and I'm not
mean like, I'm not mean to my kids.

264
00:09:09,842 --> 00:09:16,202
I'm not mean to my husband, but I can
feel that it's, I'm not happy because I'm

265
00:09:16,202 --> 00:09:19,172
stressing and that's how I cope with it.

266
00:09:19,742 --> 00:09:22,532
But you've always been like.

267
00:09:23,972 --> 00:09:27,452
You'll notice that and you'll
give me a day to kind of just be

268
00:09:27,452 --> 00:09:32,037
in myself and then I cope with
humor if I have to make you laugh.

269
00:09:32,317 --> 00:09:33,482
'cause otherwise, and you do.

270
00:09:33,482 --> 00:09:37,432
And you're very thoughtful and
you're very you're very loving to me.

271
00:09:37,432 --> 00:09:38,632
And I appreciate that.

272
00:09:38,902 --> 00:09:41,337
And I was thinking that today,
I was thinking like, man.

273
00:09:42,427 --> 00:09:44,737
I get inside myself, I get very cold.

274
00:09:44,737 --> 00:09:46,387
I get very standoffish.

275
00:09:46,657 --> 00:09:49,267
You're not mean, but you can
tell that it's like you're,

276
00:09:49,267 --> 00:09:50,617
you could be on another planet.

277
00:09:50,647 --> 00:09:51,127
Yes.

278
00:09:51,517 --> 00:09:51,877
Exactly.

279
00:09:51,877 --> 00:09:52,987
Like you're there, but you're not present.

280
00:09:53,132 --> 00:09:53,857
I'm not present.

281
00:09:53,857 --> 00:09:53,917
Yeah.

282
00:09:53,977 --> 00:09:56,887
I am figuring shit out.

283
00:09:56,947 --> 00:09:58,027
Dealing with shit.

284
00:09:58,027 --> 00:09:59,047
Staring off into space.

285
00:09:59,047 --> 00:10:00,547
Staring off into space.

286
00:10:00,577 --> 00:10:00,637
Yeah.

287
00:10:00,637 --> 00:10:04,657
Um, and you have to pull me back
and sometimes you give me a day,

288
00:10:04,657 --> 00:10:09,577
sometimes you gimme a couple of days,
but then you, you bring me back and.

289
00:10:10,237 --> 00:10:13,267
I think I've had two days already of that.

290
00:10:13,477 --> 00:10:14,047
Yeah.

291
00:10:14,047 --> 00:10:17,137
Time to wrap that shit up and time
to wrap it up and, and you do.

292
00:10:17,377 --> 00:10:17,467
Yes.

293
00:10:17,467 --> 00:10:21,367
And I was just feeling like I'm
probably not the only one doing that.

294
00:10:21,367 --> 00:10:24,187
Like I'm pretty sure Oh no, I, I
guarantee you there are others and I'm

295
00:10:24,187 --> 00:10:28,767
sure there's, and then of course, you
know, it's a lot of things, but I was

296
00:10:28,767 --> 00:10:32,577
noticing that and I was like, damn,
I could really use a hug right now.

297
00:10:33,532 --> 00:10:33,752
Oh

298
00:10:36,057 --> 00:10:36,117
no.

299
00:10:36,117 --> 00:10:37,077
I love you, my sweetheart.

300
00:10:37,292 --> 00:10:38,392
And so I was like, hum.

301
00:10:39,447 --> 00:10:41,547
I'm, I I'm not the only one No.

302
00:10:41,552 --> 00:10:42,777
That, that, that gets like that.

303
00:10:42,782 --> 00:10:47,517
And I'm, and, and you know, if we were to
really sit back and count all the eggs in

304
00:10:47,517 --> 00:10:51,187
our basket, we are very, very well off.

305
00:10:51,187 --> 00:10:53,317
It is only certain moments.

306
00:10:53,767 --> 00:10:53,827
Yeah.

307
00:10:53,857 --> 00:10:56,137
That tie other moments together.

308
00:10:56,197 --> 00:10:56,407
Yeah.

309
00:10:56,437 --> 00:10:58,357
That we're kind of in the
trenches, you know what I mean?

310
00:10:58,357 --> 00:11:00,607
We are, I mean, and this is a
good, this is a good point, is

311
00:11:00,607 --> 00:11:02,557
that we are in between travels.

312
00:11:02,827 --> 00:11:05,587
We are in between
travels, we're in between.

313
00:11:06,127 --> 00:11:14,167
Holidays we're in between lots of
your man's in between jobs like money

314
00:11:14,167 --> 00:11:16,627
is at its reach, but it's not there.

315
00:11:16,657 --> 00:11:17,137
Yeah.

316
00:11:17,137 --> 00:11:17,952
It's all timing and it's, it's all timing.

317
00:11:17,977 --> 00:11:19,087
It's all timing.

318
00:11:19,147 --> 00:11:22,227
And it's like, I know that it's just
timing and I know that it's just

319
00:11:22,227 --> 00:11:26,217
right now, and I know, I know that,
and I keep telling myself that, but

320
00:11:26,217 --> 00:11:27,507
I get tired of hearing my own voice.

321
00:11:28,422 --> 00:11:31,002
Well, I guarantee you everybody else
gets tired of hearing it in here.

322
00:11:31,002 --> 00:11:31,992
And they in the house too.

323
00:11:32,022 --> 00:11:32,412
No, they don't.

324
00:11:32,412 --> 00:11:33,252
Because I have a podcast.

325
00:11:33,312 --> 00:11:33,852
I'm just it.

326
00:11:33,852 --> 00:11:34,722
Sit in the house.

327
00:11:34,812 --> 00:11:35,922
Oh yeah.

328
00:11:35,922 --> 00:11:37,122
Everybody on the podcast loves you.

329
00:11:37,242 --> 00:11:37,512
Yeah.

330
00:11:37,992 --> 00:11:39,372
But everybody in my house loves me too.

331
00:11:39,582 --> 00:11:42,132
No, the kids are like, ah,
mom, go take a vacation.

332
00:11:42,222 --> 00:11:42,837
Yes, but don't.

333
00:11:43,752 --> 00:11:45,432
Don't pay for it, get
somebody else to pay for it.

334
00:11:46,182 --> 00:11:50,542
You know what I bring this up because you
are not the only person who is suffering

335
00:11:50,542 --> 00:11:52,432
from stress during the holiday season.

336
00:11:52,462 --> 00:11:53,482
This is a thing.

337
00:11:53,662 --> 00:11:53,812
Yeah.

338
00:11:53,842 --> 00:11:56,182
And I bring up finances
first and foremost, because

339
00:11:56,182 --> 00:11:57,052
that's the number one thing.

340
00:11:57,082 --> 00:11:57,532
It is.

341
00:11:57,562 --> 00:11:59,662
That's the number one thing
that people are stressing about.

342
00:11:59,812 --> 00:12:05,002
That's the number one P thing that people
are sitting at home and just dreading

343
00:12:05,302 --> 00:12:07,702
because either they're putting themselves.

344
00:12:08,407 --> 00:12:11,077
You know, in debt so that
they can get people gifts.

345
00:12:11,197 --> 00:12:11,317
Yeah.

346
00:12:11,317 --> 00:12:15,217
They're putting themselves in debt
because they want to spend on the

347
00:12:15,217 --> 00:12:19,367
people that, that mean a lot to them or
they're just trying to power their home.

348
00:12:19,517 --> 00:12:19,877
Yeah.

349
00:12:19,907 --> 00:12:21,197
And buy groceries.

350
00:12:21,227 --> 00:12:21,437
Yeah.

351
00:12:21,497 --> 00:12:23,657
Either way it's hard times for everybody.

352
00:12:23,657 --> 00:12:23,987
It is.

353
00:12:24,017 --> 00:12:27,137
Finances are the number
one reason for divorce.

354
00:12:27,167 --> 00:12:27,467
Yeah.

355
00:12:27,557 --> 00:12:31,642
And I guess what I'm really trying
to get at here, you wanted divorce

356
00:12:31,642 --> 00:12:33,122
for our listeners, Hells no.

357
00:12:33,977 --> 00:12:35,297
You realize first off.

358
00:12:35,862 --> 00:12:39,462
I get half of everything, but,
uh, you can have the kids.

359
00:12:39,492 --> 00:12:40,212
We're in Texas, baby.

360
00:12:40,212 --> 00:12:41,202
You don't get half of nothing.

361
00:12:41,262 --> 00:12:44,292
Oh, you can, you just have
it, have it all, whatever.

362
00:12:45,402 --> 00:12:45,672
No.

363
00:12:45,672 --> 00:12:51,132
You know, I really think that us, what
we're going through the stress Yeah.

364
00:12:51,162 --> 00:12:53,022
And the holiday season of it all.

365
00:12:53,202 --> 00:12:53,472
Yeah.

366
00:12:53,712 --> 00:12:57,672
There are so many listeners out there
that are having the same kind of issues.

367
00:12:57,672 --> 00:12:57,732
Yeah.

368
00:12:58,122 --> 00:13:03,072
And I feel like it's important to bring it
up to let people know that hey, look, huh.

369
00:13:04,572 --> 00:13:06,162
It's okay to be stressed.

370
00:13:06,522 --> 00:13:09,227
Uh, and you gotta kind
of breathe it out though.

371
00:13:09,257 --> 00:13:14,117
You do, because this kind of stress,
whatever, actually any kind of

372
00:13:14,117 --> 00:13:18,757
stress can lead to other stresses,
or other things in your brain.

373
00:13:18,807 --> 00:13:22,737
Like we, we started off, we're
talking about our libido, right?

374
00:13:22,797 --> 00:13:23,067
Yeah.

375
00:13:23,307 --> 00:13:28,927
And so that's gonna lead to stress,
and that gets you in a bad mood.

376
00:13:29,527 --> 00:13:31,327
So anything can trigger you.

377
00:13:31,537 --> 00:13:33,037
Jealousy can trigger you.

378
00:13:33,037 --> 00:13:34,927
Insecurity is gonna trigger you.

379
00:13:34,987 --> 00:13:35,197
Yeah.

380
00:13:35,197 --> 00:13:40,097
Especially during the holidays when you're
stressed you know, going back to the beach

381
00:13:40,097 --> 00:13:42,977
thing that we had over the summertime,
we went to that beach takeover.

382
00:13:43,397 --> 00:13:45,257
And you were not feeling well?

383
00:13:45,257 --> 00:13:45,612
No, no.

384
00:13:45,617 --> 00:13:50,147
And because you were not feeling
well, that caused insecurities.

385
00:13:50,357 --> 00:13:54,107
And not really jealousies, but
just more of a, i I don't want

386
00:13:54,107 --> 00:13:56,447
you to go out and be with people.

387
00:13:56,477 --> 00:13:56,537
Yeah.

388
00:13:56,537 --> 00:13:57,347
I want you here.

389
00:13:57,377 --> 00:13:58,727
I need comfort right now.

390
00:13:58,732 --> 00:14:01,817
And I, I, I relate it
to this kind of stress.

391
00:14:01,817 --> 00:14:01,877
Yeah.

392
00:14:01,907 --> 00:14:04,787
This stress really is one
of those things where.

393
00:14:05,612 --> 00:14:08,132
If I were to go out and be
like, well, hey, peace out.

394
00:14:08,132 --> 00:14:10,262
I'm gonna go meet up with
somebody and go have some fun,

395
00:14:10,442 --> 00:14:11,552
what would your reaction be?

396
00:14:12,452 --> 00:14:13,232
Don't come back.

397
00:14:13,742 --> 00:14:15,302
Geez, you don't mean that.

398
00:14:15,352 --> 00:14:16,252
But I get it.

399
00:14:16,282 --> 00:14:16,737
You know what I mean?

400
00:14:16,762 --> 00:14:18,617
'cause that's kind of a difficult, I
mean, I, I would, I wouldn't, that's

401
00:14:18,617 --> 00:14:19,897
not my, that's kind of, that's my, yeah.

402
00:14:19,897 --> 00:14:26,752
I would be like, actually I would, I would
be, I would say, no, we should really,

403
00:14:26,752 --> 00:14:28,582
like, you should not do that right now.

404
00:14:28,582 --> 00:14:29,692
Like, I need you here.

405
00:14:30,517 --> 00:14:32,047
I'd have communication with you.

406
00:14:32,047 --> 00:14:32,467
I, I'd Oh, yeah.

407
00:14:32,467 --> 00:14:34,087
It wouldn't be that nice, but yeah.

408
00:14:34,092 --> 00:14:35,137
Yeah, I agree.

409
00:14:35,377 --> 00:14:39,307
Now and, and, and whatever you shoot
at me, if I were to do that Yeah.

410
00:14:39,727 --> 00:14:40,957
Would be completely justified.

411
00:14:41,107 --> 00:14:41,347
Yeah.

412
00:14:41,657 --> 00:14:44,867
And, and I, I've seen
couples in this lifestyle.

413
00:14:45,857 --> 00:14:47,477
That don't prioritize each other.

414
00:14:47,567 --> 00:14:48,947
No, I have seen that.

415
00:14:48,947 --> 00:14:49,457
Oh my gosh.

416
00:14:49,487 --> 00:14:49,727
Yeah.

417
00:14:50,087 --> 00:14:50,267
Yeah.

418
00:14:50,267 --> 00:14:51,827
They don't prioritize each other.

419
00:14:51,887 --> 00:14:52,157
No.

420
00:14:52,187 --> 00:14:55,007
And in situations like this mm-hmm.

421
00:14:55,247 --> 00:14:57,502
Where there is high stress mm-hmm.

422
00:14:57,722 --> 00:14:58,982
For whatever reason mm-hmm.

423
00:14:59,267 --> 00:15:04,717
That is the time for the couple
to really come together and prove

424
00:15:04,777 --> 00:15:06,547
to each other that they're strong.

425
00:15:06,547 --> 00:15:06,637
Yes.

426
00:15:06,967 --> 00:15:09,367
Prove to each other that
they've got each other's back.

427
00:15:09,372 --> 00:15:09,562
Yeah.

428
00:15:10,062 --> 00:15:12,162
And fix whatever needs fixing.

429
00:15:12,952 --> 00:15:14,507
Before you traipses off
and go have a good time.

430
00:15:14,507 --> 00:15:18,652
And again, you may not need to fix
anything, but your partner may need you

431
00:15:18,652 --> 00:15:22,252
to just hold their hand, give them a hug.

432
00:15:22,342 --> 00:15:22,402
Yeah.

433
00:15:22,672 --> 00:15:28,882
And just let them know, Hey, I know that
you're dealing with stress holiday blues.

434
00:15:29,202 --> 00:15:30,672
You're just not yourself right now.

435
00:15:30,672 --> 00:15:33,252
Know it's okay.

436
00:15:33,432 --> 00:15:33,882
I got you.

437
00:15:34,247 --> 00:15:34,537
Yeah.

438
00:15:34,542 --> 00:15:34,752
Yeah.

439
00:15:34,782 --> 00:15:35,257
I got you.

440
00:15:35,482 --> 00:15:40,522
For you, the holidays trigger you
for finances and they always have.

441
00:15:40,582 --> 00:15:41,842
Always, since we've been together, yes.

442
00:15:41,872 --> 00:15:43,312
Probably before we got together, yes.

443
00:15:43,372 --> 00:15:44,632
It's always been a situation.

444
00:15:44,662 --> 00:15:44,752
Yes.

445
00:15:45,242 --> 00:15:48,422
For me, the holidays trigger me,
but in a completely different

446
00:15:48,422 --> 00:15:50,612
way, so I don't think of that.

447
00:15:51,117 --> 00:15:55,317
Now for those of you who don't know me
personally or haven't met me personally,

448
00:15:55,347 --> 00:15:56,967
I'm gonna take you down a little sad trip.

449
00:15:57,117 --> 00:15:59,212
Oh, not that sad one.

450
00:15:59,212 --> 00:16:00,207
I'm gonna take you down a sad trip.

451
00:16:00,207 --> 00:16:02,877
I'm sorry, but this is my trigger
during the holidays and it has

452
00:16:02,877 --> 00:16:04,137
nothing to do with finance.

453
00:16:04,137 --> 00:16:04,707
Is that right?

454
00:16:04,712 --> 00:16:04,972
It's, it is.

455
00:16:05,187 --> 00:16:09,027
I come from a very abused
household and abusive household.

456
00:16:09,032 --> 00:16:09,052
Mm-hmm.

457
00:16:09,297 --> 00:16:10,797
Uh, both physically and mentally.

458
00:16:11,037 --> 00:16:14,217
And my parents were not good people.

459
00:16:14,277 --> 00:16:14,457
No.

460
00:16:15,582 --> 00:16:19,902
At one point when my parents felt like
they couldn't control me because I was

461
00:16:19,902 --> 00:16:23,132
big enough to fight my dad back they
decided to kick me outta the house.

462
00:16:23,132 --> 00:16:24,362
I was 17 years old.

463
00:16:24,392 --> 00:16:24,482
Mm-hmm.

464
00:16:24,852 --> 00:16:28,062
Still a senior in high school
and I was living on the streets.

465
00:16:28,162 --> 00:16:35,032
Uh, now for those of you who, uh,
don't know the area that I come from,

466
00:16:35,032 --> 00:16:39,832
I come from a small beach town, uh,
in South Texas, and it very much is

467
00:16:39,832 --> 00:16:41,782
always humid and it's always hot.

468
00:16:41,962 --> 00:16:42,412
Yes.

469
00:16:42,442 --> 00:16:42,922
But.

470
00:16:42,967 --> 00:16:45,277
Year in 2000.

471
00:16:45,277 --> 00:16:47,977
This and four, was it thousand
three this year you got kicked out?

472
00:16:47,977 --> 00:16:48,097
Yeah.

473
00:16:48,097 --> 00:16:49,747
Well, no, I had been
out for a little while.

474
00:16:49,747 --> 00:16:51,877
I'd been out and I was living in a car.

475
00:16:51,967 --> 00:16:52,297
Okay.

476
00:16:52,297 --> 00:16:56,287
An abandoned car, and I was working
at a barbecue joint down the street

477
00:16:56,437 --> 00:16:58,177
and this is how my life was going.

478
00:16:58,507 --> 00:17:00,277
I was trying to get myself together.

479
00:17:00,277 --> 00:17:02,407
I was getting every paycheck
I could and I was trying to

480
00:17:02,407 --> 00:17:04,497
save to get my ass out of that.

481
00:17:04,977 --> 00:17:07,347
Car and into an apartment.

482
00:17:07,647 --> 00:17:09,387
So this is something
that I was working on.

483
00:17:09,817 --> 00:17:13,117
It was the big snow of
2003, I think it was.

484
00:17:13,147 --> 00:17:14,407
Or 2004, right?

485
00:17:14,407 --> 00:17:15,637
2003, 2004. Yeah.

486
00:17:15,667 --> 00:17:16,687
It was one of those years.

487
00:17:16,897 --> 00:17:19,507
But it was the big one that
landed at Christmas time.

488
00:17:19,537 --> 00:17:20,047
Yes.

489
00:17:20,107 --> 00:17:23,887
Now, uh, obviously holidays suck
when you feel like you're all alone.

490
00:17:23,887 --> 00:17:26,647
You have no family and
you are on the streets.

491
00:17:26,707 --> 00:17:26,887
Yeah.

492
00:17:27,157 --> 00:17:31,327
Uh, but then you add on the fact
that here it was Christmas Eve.

493
00:17:32,362 --> 00:17:36,082
I left my job because they were shutting
down early because of the reports

494
00:17:36,142 --> 00:17:38,032
of Major uh, I see on the ground.

495
00:17:38,032 --> 00:17:38,962
Ice, ice on the ground.

496
00:17:38,962 --> 00:17:39,367
Yeah, there was, yeah.

497
00:17:39,372 --> 00:17:43,912
So I walked to my car, which was very,
very cold to the car that I was sleeping

498
00:17:43,912 --> 00:17:48,382
in, and I bundled up as much as I could
and I was just preparing for a long night.

499
00:17:48,592 --> 00:17:48,772
Yeah.

500
00:17:48,772 --> 00:17:55,402
Well, the police in times like that, when
it comes to a city that never gets those

501
00:17:55,402 --> 00:18:00,322
kind of temperatures, they start going
and finding all the homeless that are out.

502
00:18:00,927 --> 00:18:03,142
And they tell 'em they can't stay there.

503
00:18:03,292 --> 00:18:05,122
And so I was no exception.

504
00:18:05,122 --> 00:18:10,022
They knocked on my window and they said,
look, you can't stay here, you gotta go.

505
00:18:10,352 --> 00:18:11,492
And I said, well, where do I go?

506
00:18:11,492 --> 00:18:13,232
They said, that's not our problem.

507
00:18:13,262 --> 00:18:14,162
You just gotta go.

508
00:18:14,312 --> 00:18:14,882
Really?

509
00:18:14,882 --> 00:18:15,302
Yeah.

510
00:18:15,362 --> 00:18:16,682
And that just blew my mind.

511
00:18:16,682 --> 00:18:17,252
No shelter.

512
00:18:17,252 --> 00:18:18,212
They didn't wanna drive you?

513
00:18:18,212 --> 00:18:18,632
Nothing.

514
00:18:18,632 --> 00:18:19,142
Nothing.

515
00:18:19,142 --> 00:18:22,112
They did their part by telling
me I couldn't stay in that car.

516
00:18:22,262 --> 00:18:23,762
And that's why I don't like police.

517
00:18:24,272 --> 00:18:24,962
Okay.

518
00:18:25,172 --> 00:18:25,502
Period.

519
00:18:25,502 --> 00:18:29,312
So, uh, you know, I, I
was, I didn't know what I.

520
00:18:29,687 --> 00:18:31,097
Could do about the situation.

521
00:18:31,097 --> 00:18:33,557
So I packed up everything
in my, in my bag.

522
00:18:33,587 --> 00:18:33,647
Yeah.

523
00:18:33,647 --> 00:18:34,517
My duffle bag.

524
00:18:35,057 --> 00:18:37,307
And I said, well, I'm gonna,
I'm gonna have to find a hotel.

525
00:18:37,547 --> 00:18:37,787
Yeah.

526
00:18:37,847 --> 00:18:41,057
And so I'm already in this
very, very bad neighborhood.

527
00:18:41,057 --> 00:18:47,337
I live in this abandoned vehicle and
I'm walking these streets at night.

528
00:18:47,437 --> 00:18:49,957
Which is already a dangerous
thing in and of itself, you

529
00:18:49,957 --> 00:18:51,007
knows, especially in that area.

530
00:18:51,317 --> 00:18:52,457
Very, lots of drugs.

531
00:18:52,457 --> 00:18:53,237
Lots of gangs.

532
00:18:53,267 --> 00:18:54,107
Lots of prostitutes.

533
00:18:54,107 --> 00:18:54,887
It's a thing out there.

534
00:18:54,887 --> 00:18:55,127
Yeah.

535
00:18:55,847 --> 00:19:00,257
And I basically, but the roads were icy,
so that area alone is, is dangerous.

536
00:19:00,587 --> 00:19:03,117
And the people in that city
were already bad drivers.

537
00:19:03,117 --> 00:19:04,377
You add on ice, forget it.

538
00:19:04,377 --> 00:19:07,527
They were, I, I, I remember there
were times where I was walking

539
00:19:07,557 --> 00:19:10,317
to get to a hotel and having to.

540
00:19:10,707 --> 00:19:14,457
Move off to the side because
people were sliding off the street.

541
00:19:14,487 --> 00:19:14,697
Yeah.

542
00:19:14,697 --> 00:19:15,417
It was dangerous.

543
00:19:15,447 --> 00:19:15,657
Yeah.

544
00:19:16,047 --> 00:19:22,077
Uh, you know, and I walked to a couple
of hotels, all of which had no vacancies.

545
00:19:22,107 --> 00:19:22,257
Mm-hmm.

546
00:19:22,677 --> 00:19:26,997
And so I walked a total of
about, I don't know, almost four

547
00:19:26,997 --> 00:19:29,757
miles to get to a Motel six.

548
00:19:30,027 --> 00:19:31,887
Now, this Motel six was not the greatest.

549
00:19:31,947 --> 00:19:32,037
Mm-hmm.

550
00:19:32,277 --> 00:19:34,457
It was in a very bad neighborhood.

551
00:19:34,577 --> 00:19:34,667
Mm-hmm.

552
00:19:35,027 --> 00:19:36,862
And it was not the indoor motel sixes.

553
00:19:36,862 --> 00:19:37,142
Mm-hmm.

554
00:19:37,222 --> 00:19:38,267
It was an outdoor one.

555
00:19:38,272 --> 00:19:38,302
Mm-hmm.

556
00:19:38,382 --> 00:19:38,702
If you know what I mean.

557
00:19:38,702 --> 00:19:38,712
Mm-hmm.

558
00:19:38,867 --> 00:19:42,107
So you've got the outdoor stairs
and the, the, the room face out.

559
00:19:43,067 --> 00:19:44,387
And I walked in.

560
00:19:45,227 --> 00:19:48,017
And I have been walking in the
snow for quite some time now.

561
00:19:48,317 --> 00:19:49,607
I've been dodging cars.

562
00:19:49,607 --> 00:19:51,877
I am soaked from head to toe.

563
00:19:51,907 --> 00:19:52,057
Mm-hmm.

564
00:19:52,297 --> 00:19:53,707
I've got ice in my shoes.

565
00:19:53,707 --> 00:19:54,697
I mean, it's bad.

566
00:19:54,797 --> 00:19:58,397
And I walk into this motel
six, and there's this one kid

567
00:19:58,697 --> 00:19:59,837
had to have been a kid Yeah.

568
00:19:59,837 --> 00:20:00,557
Behind the counter.

569
00:20:00,647 --> 00:20:04,097
And I said, listen, I need to rent a room.

570
00:20:04,907 --> 00:20:09,792
And this guy says, well, I'm
afraid we're at max capacity.

571
00:20:10,357 --> 00:20:11,917
For all the downstairs rooms.

572
00:20:12,487 --> 00:20:13,327
That's what he threw in.

573
00:20:13,447 --> 00:20:13,507
Yeah.

574
00:20:13,507 --> 00:20:14,647
For all the downstairs rooms.

575
00:20:14,647 --> 00:20:14,707
Yeah.

576
00:20:14,707 --> 00:20:16,757
And I said what about your upstairs rooms?

577
00:20:16,787 --> 00:20:17,507
I'll take whatever.

578
00:20:18,437 --> 00:20:24,287
And the guy says, we're not allowed to
rent those out because of all the snow.

579
00:20:24,287 --> 00:20:26,807
If you were to fall, it
could be a liability.

580
00:20:26,837 --> 00:20:27,917
Yeah, it's a problem.

581
00:20:27,917 --> 00:20:28,337
Yeah.

582
00:20:29,267 --> 00:20:30,467
I have an issue with that.

583
00:20:30,992 --> 00:20:32,282
I'm willing to pay double.

584
00:20:32,612 --> 00:20:34,142
I will sign a waiver.

585
00:20:34,172 --> 00:20:35,702
I don't care what it takes.

586
00:20:35,972 --> 00:20:37,112
You have rooms.

587
00:20:37,232 --> 00:20:39,512
I have money and I don't mind.

588
00:20:39,662 --> 00:20:41,642
Yeah, just it's Christmas Eve, man.

589
00:20:41,642 --> 00:20:42,002
Come on.

590
00:20:42,062 --> 00:20:42,722
Just let me have a room.

591
00:20:42,722 --> 00:20:42,932
Yeah.

592
00:20:42,932 --> 00:20:45,872
I walked four miles to get here
and so he said, well, let me

593
00:20:45,872 --> 00:20:46,982
get my manager on the phone.

594
00:20:46,982 --> 00:20:48,482
Lemme see if he'll agree to anything.

595
00:20:49,382 --> 00:20:52,322
Manager gets on the phone, this person
talks to the manager for a while.

596
00:20:52,382 --> 00:20:56,582
I get on the phone with the manager and I
said, look, I, I understand the situation.

597
00:20:56,762 --> 00:20:57,782
I completely get it.

598
00:20:58,457 --> 00:21:00,077
I will sign a waiver.

599
00:21:00,287 --> 00:21:01,427
I will pay double.

600
00:21:01,427 --> 00:21:02,747
I will do whatever I have to do.

601
00:21:02,747 --> 00:21:04,127
But I need a place to stay.

602
00:21:04,157 --> 00:21:05,447
I've got nothing tonight.

603
00:21:05,597 --> 00:21:06,827
It's Christmas Eve, man.

604
00:21:07,667 --> 00:21:12,257
And the guy said, look, just sign a little
note saying that you won't sue us if you

605
00:21:12,257 --> 00:21:14,597
fall and you don't have to pay double.

606
00:21:14,597 --> 00:21:17,477
We'll rent out a room and
just stay in the room.

607
00:21:17,607 --> 00:21:18,237
Don't come out.

608
00:21:18,237 --> 00:21:19,047
Don't be coming out.

609
00:21:19,137 --> 00:21:20,337
Yeah, just do what you gotta do.

610
00:21:20,337 --> 00:21:20,907
Okay, fine.

611
00:21:21,477 --> 00:21:21,807
Cool.

612
00:21:22,812 --> 00:21:26,892
So I make my payments and they give
me a room key and I go upstairs and

613
00:21:26,892 --> 00:21:32,502
I slosh upstairs, and I get in the
room and I'm soaked from head to toe.

614
00:21:32,502 --> 00:21:32,592
Mm-hmm.

615
00:21:32,622 --> 00:21:34,572
'cause anybody who's walked in snow Yeah.

616
00:21:34,577 --> 00:21:34,787
Knows.

617
00:21:35,532 --> 00:21:36,552
It's wet ice.

618
00:21:36,552 --> 00:21:36,612
Yeah.

619
00:21:36,642 --> 00:21:39,472
It's wet, you know, it's like,
uh, you're pretty much walking

620
00:21:39,472 --> 00:21:41,432
in rain except really cold.

621
00:21:41,922 --> 00:21:43,512
And so I turned up the heater.

622
00:21:43,602 --> 00:21:47,602
I put my clothes to dry by the
heater stripped down and took

623
00:21:47,962 --> 00:21:49,402
the hottest shower I could take.

624
00:21:49,432 --> 00:21:49,732
Yeah.

625
00:21:50,062 --> 00:21:54,412
And, uh, basically just kind
of defrosted for a while and.

626
00:21:55,222 --> 00:21:58,342
Went to the nearest vending
machine and bought up every snack

627
00:21:58,342 --> 00:22:00,472
I could and every soda I could.

628
00:22:00,952 --> 00:22:04,072
And I sat there and I watched
a Christmas story Yes.

629
00:22:04,342 --> 00:22:07,192
On TBS be looped over.

630
00:22:07,192 --> 00:22:13,342
It was loop over from day till night
and I was so, you know, I still have,

631
00:22:13,432 --> 00:22:15,082
it took you years to watch that movie.

632
00:22:15,082 --> 00:22:18,352
I can watch it now, but even then,
every now and then I get the ick.

633
00:22:18,352 --> 00:22:18,832
I'm like, Ugh.

634
00:22:19,132 --> 00:22:19,552
God.

635
00:22:19,882 --> 00:22:19,942
Yeah.

636
00:22:19,992 --> 00:22:21,372
So yeah.

637
00:22:22,037 --> 00:22:23,237
That was my Christmas.

638
00:22:23,267 --> 00:22:23,477
Yeah.

639
00:22:23,507 --> 00:22:28,637
Now I, I know after speaking to
my parents after several years

640
00:22:28,637 --> 00:22:31,487
later that at this same time

641
00:22:33,677 --> 00:22:35,657
as the snow started to fall.

642
00:22:35,747 --> 00:22:35,837
Yes.

643
00:22:35,867 --> 00:22:39,287
And I was apparently on my journey to Yes.

644
00:22:39,377 --> 00:22:40,787
Find a place to stay.

645
00:22:40,792 --> 00:22:41,042
Yeah.

646
00:22:42,152 --> 00:22:46,292
My parents were entertaining a
couple of friends at their home.

647
00:22:46,532 --> 00:22:49,002
Sitting by the fire drinking their wine.

648
00:22:49,122 --> 00:22:52,362
And looking outside the window going, oh
look, look at all that beautiful snow.

649
00:22:52,962 --> 00:22:56,652
And that is why they have
horrible diseases and are going

650
00:22:56,652 --> 00:22:58,662
to die a very painful death.

651
00:22:58,752 --> 00:22:59,352
My gosh.

652
00:22:59,742 --> 00:23:03,372
You know that, like, that's why, that's
one of the many reasons why I, I am,

653
00:23:03,432 --> 00:23:07,752
I do not have, have you get the, uh,
a, a a relationship with my parents.

654
00:23:07,752 --> 00:23:07,842
Yeah.

655
00:23:07,842 --> 00:23:08,532
With my family.

656
00:23:08,532 --> 00:23:11,122
I. You know, I'm one of
those no contact people.

657
00:23:11,122 --> 00:23:11,992
Sorry guys.

658
00:23:11,992 --> 00:23:13,582
I know that there's people
that don't agree with that.

659
00:23:13,582 --> 00:23:13,642
Yeah.

660
00:23:13,672 --> 00:23:15,412
But hey, I have my reasons.

661
00:23:15,592 --> 00:23:17,512
And what you're hearing
is only a part of that.

662
00:23:17,512 --> 00:23:20,062
This is just the December,
the Christmas story.

663
00:23:20,302 --> 00:23:24,232
This is why we don't like December
and, and so Yeah, you have to

664
00:23:24,232 --> 00:23:25,922
understand one thing is I've.

665
00:23:26,362 --> 00:23:29,332
Struggled with my mental health
and a lot of my struggles for

666
00:23:29,332 --> 00:23:32,902
mental health have derived from
the time that I was on the streets.

667
00:23:32,962 --> 00:23:33,022
Yeah.

668
00:23:33,022 --> 00:23:36,382
I was diagnosed with anxiety,
depression, and PTSD.

669
00:23:36,412 --> 00:23:36,652
Yeah.

670
00:23:36,652 --> 00:23:40,132
And the PTSD came from
my time on the streets.

671
00:23:40,162 --> 00:23:40,252
Mm-hmm.

672
00:23:41,032 --> 00:23:42,022
You see a lot of bad shit.

673
00:23:42,622 --> 00:23:45,292
I get those holiday blues.

674
00:23:45,322 --> 00:23:45,652
Yeah.

675
00:23:45,782 --> 00:23:49,532
And even though I'm living the life
and trust me, I remind myself every

676
00:23:49,532 --> 00:23:52,277
single day how great my life is.

677
00:23:52,277 --> 00:23:52,637
Mm-hmm.

678
00:23:52,717 --> 00:23:53,822
And how lucky I am.

679
00:23:53,822 --> 00:23:53,942
Mm-hmm.

680
00:23:54,182 --> 00:23:58,172
To have you, to have our children,
to have this beautiful roof over our

681
00:23:58,172 --> 00:24:01,052
heads, to have the friends that we
have, the listeners that we have.

682
00:24:01,052 --> 00:24:02,822
'cause we have this awesome podcast.

683
00:24:03,452 --> 00:24:04,472
I am very lucky.

684
00:24:04,477 --> 00:24:04,677
Yeah.

685
00:24:04,697 --> 00:24:06,932
And I am very, very thankful for it.

686
00:24:07,562 --> 00:24:10,382
But anytime the holidays hit.

687
00:24:10,442 --> 00:24:10,502
Yeah.

688
00:24:11,072 --> 00:24:12,962
My mind goes there.

689
00:24:13,022 --> 00:24:13,352
Yeah.

690
00:24:13,772 --> 00:24:16,202
And I'm getting better at
handling it every year.

691
00:24:16,202 --> 00:24:17,582
I'm getting better at handling it.

692
00:24:17,642 --> 00:24:22,322
Uh, you know, it used to really,
really put me in a major spiraled funk.

693
00:24:22,412 --> 00:24:22,532
Mm-hmm.

694
00:24:22,962 --> 00:24:29,832
And I still get days where I have
reflections of that time out there.

695
00:24:30,882 --> 00:24:31,962
Hard times, man.

696
00:24:31,992 --> 00:24:32,712
Hard times.

697
00:24:32,742 --> 00:24:35,982
'cause not only are you dealing
with the fact that you have

698
00:24:35,982 --> 00:24:37,842
nobody at Christmas time mm-hmm.

699
00:24:38,112 --> 00:24:40,092
But you're dealing with the
fact that you have nothing.

700
00:24:40,392 --> 00:24:40,542
Yeah.

701
00:24:40,542 --> 00:24:41,472
And nowhere to go.

702
00:24:41,472 --> 00:24:43,517
No, that's, I mean, that's, that's
so that's my, my trigger's what?

703
00:24:43,517 --> 00:24:43,527
Yeah.

704
00:24:44,172 --> 00:24:46,122
And the family.

705
00:24:46,182 --> 00:24:48,612
The fact that we don't
have family outside of us.

706
00:24:48,642 --> 00:24:49,452
In our kids.

707
00:24:49,602 --> 00:24:50,952
We don't have cousins.

708
00:24:50,952 --> 00:24:52,332
We don't have aunts or uncles.

709
00:24:52,362 --> 00:24:52,422
No.

710
00:24:52,422 --> 00:24:54,792
Because of our estrangement to our family.

711
00:24:54,882 --> 00:24:55,092
Yeah.

712
00:24:55,152 --> 00:24:57,162
We are reminded every holiday.

713
00:24:58,707 --> 00:25:00,537
Kind of what triggers us.

714
00:25:00,537 --> 00:25:03,897
Let me tell you what I was thinking
about this week, this holiday, or Yes.

715
00:25:03,957 --> 00:25:04,857
Or earlier today.

716
00:25:04,862 --> 00:25:06,657
I was like, feed, I was like, dang man.

717
00:25:06,747 --> 00:25:13,317
My parent, my, my sister, my, I'm
gonna call her whatever she is.

718
00:25:13,947 --> 00:25:17,337
They would hook up my kids and
his parents would hook up our

719
00:25:17,337 --> 00:25:18,597
kids during Christmas time.

720
00:25:19,047 --> 00:25:19,107
Yeah.

721
00:25:19,107 --> 00:25:19,147
And I was like.

722
00:25:19,842 --> 00:25:20,052
Damn.

723
00:25:20,052 --> 00:25:20,262
It helped.

724
00:25:21,912 --> 00:25:22,122
It helped.

725
00:25:22,122 --> 00:25:22,902
I miss that.

726
00:25:23,052 --> 00:25:23,352
It helped.

727
00:25:23,352 --> 00:25:23,412
Yeah.

728
00:25:23,412 --> 00:25:24,762
Um, I don't miss them, but yeah.

729
00:25:24,792 --> 00:25:28,812
No, it's, um, it's a very weird
time of year for us and we have

730
00:25:28,812 --> 00:25:35,802
a lot of things going on and it's
just, it's a bit overwhelming.

731
00:25:35,892 --> 00:25:36,252
Yeah.

732
00:25:36,492 --> 00:25:37,597
And, you know, part of the, the.

733
00:25:38,412 --> 00:25:43,122
The reason why, you know, we started
reaching out to the lifestyle community

734
00:25:43,482 --> 00:25:47,472
and we started bringing friends into our
circle is because of our lack of family.

735
00:25:47,652 --> 00:25:47,802
Yeah.

736
00:25:47,852 --> 00:25:54,212
And so because of that, when we
say this community means a lot to

737
00:25:54,212 --> 00:25:55,922
us, this community is our family.

738
00:25:56,687 --> 00:25:58,187
That's exactly what it is.

739
00:25:58,217 --> 00:25:58,547
Yeah.

740
00:25:58,547 --> 00:26:01,757
Uh, because we don't have family
outside of us and our kids.

741
00:26:01,757 --> 00:26:03,467
Like this is what we have.

742
00:26:03,617 --> 00:26:03,767
Yeah.

743
00:26:03,767 --> 00:26:05,627
And we make these connections.

744
00:26:05,627 --> 00:26:08,567
These connections are very solid
and they're very important to us.

745
00:26:08,572 --> 00:26:08,642
Mm-hmm.

746
00:26:08,872 --> 00:26:14,812
And so yes, we have our own sets
of stress and if you are out there

747
00:26:15,502 --> 00:26:18,292
and you are feeling alone during.

748
00:26:18,847 --> 00:26:19,687
The holidays?

749
00:26:19,957 --> 00:26:20,407
Yes.

750
00:26:20,497 --> 00:26:23,827
Or you are feeling the press of finances.

751
00:26:24,007 --> 00:26:27,372
Just know, just from us
alone, you are not alone.

752
00:26:27,372 --> 00:26:29,887
You are not alone at all.

753
00:26:30,307 --> 00:26:33,127
There are many of us who are going
through the same troubles as you.

754
00:26:33,157 --> 00:26:34,837
Maybe not the exact same troubles.

755
00:26:35,257 --> 00:26:37,902
Uh, you know, maybe you were laid
off from a, from a, an adult.

756
00:26:38,487 --> 00:26:39,417
Toy company or something.

757
00:26:39,417 --> 00:26:41,967
I, I mean, whatever the
situation, whatever it is.

758
00:26:41,967 --> 00:26:46,617
But we all have that relatable issue
because it's the holidays and the

759
00:26:46,617 --> 00:26:48,537
holidays are never easy on anybody.

760
00:26:48,777 --> 00:26:54,027
And when the holidays are not easy,
how can you think about your libido?

761
00:26:54,297 --> 00:26:55,047
Are you kidding me?

762
00:26:55,047 --> 00:26:56,517
How can you think about the lifestyle?

763
00:26:56,577 --> 00:27:00,837
How can you think about, literally
came in today and I was like, oh man.

764
00:27:01,292 --> 00:27:01,952
Oh man.

765
00:27:02,307 --> 00:27:03,027
Geez man.

766
00:27:03,297 --> 00:27:06,357
It's just sometimes you're
just not in the mood and.

767
00:27:07,087 --> 00:27:08,032
You just got, we're not having sex.

768
00:27:08,557 --> 00:27:09,127
We're talking about it.

769
00:27:09,127 --> 00:27:11,767
You gotta do, you gotta
do it no matter what.

770
00:27:12,157 --> 00:27:14,227
So see, that's the way
she talks about her sex.

771
00:27:14,317 --> 00:27:15,637
You gotta do it no matter what.

772
00:27:15,637 --> 00:27:17,257
I mean, I'm like, whatever.

773
00:27:17,327 --> 00:27:20,837
No man give, gimme that fake excitement.

774
00:27:21,212 --> 00:27:21,662
Baby.

775
00:27:21,662 --> 00:27:22,832
I love having sex with you.

776
00:27:23,312 --> 00:27:23,342
Aw.

777
00:27:23,432 --> 00:27:24,962
And you gotta take it when you want it.

778
00:27:25,082 --> 00:27:25,532
I know.

779
00:27:25,532 --> 00:27:26,792
But see, that's the thing about it.

780
00:27:26,792 --> 00:27:27,757
And we've talked about that before.

781
00:27:27,757 --> 00:27:28,037
Before.

782
00:27:28,037 --> 00:27:28,142
No, I actually don't.

783
00:27:28,142 --> 00:27:30,752
Like right now, like, well, last
night I really wanted it, but then I

784
00:27:30,752 --> 00:27:33,542
was like, I really don't feel like I
don't, we talked about it for a sec.

785
00:27:33,572 --> 00:27:33,902
Yeah.

786
00:27:34,052 --> 00:27:34,742
No we didn't.

787
00:27:34,742 --> 00:27:35,522
Maybe it was in your head.

788
00:27:35,522 --> 00:27:37,982
Maybe it was in my head because
I wanted it, but at the same

789
00:27:37,982 --> 00:27:40,112
time, I. I also wanted sleep.

790
00:27:40,472 --> 00:27:40,652
Yeah.

791
00:27:40,652 --> 00:27:43,482
Uh, because sometimes when
you're stressed, boy, that

792
00:27:43,482 --> 00:27:45,252
sleep just the best place to be.

793
00:27:45,257 --> 00:27:45,617
We've been so good.

794
00:27:45,642 --> 00:27:46,752
We've been sleeping a lot.

795
00:27:46,752 --> 00:27:46,812
Yeah.

796
00:27:46,872 --> 00:27:47,982
But anyway, yes.

797
00:27:47,982 --> 00:27:48,042
Yeah.

798
00:27:48,252 --> 00:27:51,582
So that's, that's the point
of this is that you're not the

799
00:27:51,582 --> 00:27:52,812
only ones who are stressed.

800
00:27:52,812 --> 00:27:54,642
There's a lot of us who
are stressed out there.

801
00:27:54,667 --> 00:27:59,227
It can be difficult navigating the
lifestyle when you are stressed

802
00:27:59,437 --> 00:28:02,707
or if you are not feeling the
stress, but your partner is.

803
00:28:03,637 --> 00:28:05,617
Be mindful.

804
00:28:05,707 --> 00:28:06,517
Be mindful.

805
00:28:06,517 --> 00:28:07,717
Be mindful of that.

806
00:28:07,777 --> 00:28:10,687
We don't all deal with stress
differently and yeah, we actually all

807
00:28:10,687 --> 00:28:12,517
deals with stress very differently.

808
00:28:12,522 --> 00:28:12,732
Yeah.

809
00:28:12,937 --> 00:28:13,237
Yeah.

810
00:28:13,237 --> 00:28:14,617
Like I'm, Adam looks for humor.

811
00:28:14,677 --> 00:28:15,277
I do.

812
00:28:15,327 --> 00:28:16,632
I'm, and I do not.

813
00:28:16,692 --> 00:28:17,997
And, and you are dreadful.

814
00:28:18,002 --> 00:28:18,472
I'm dreadful.

815
00:28:18,492 --> 00:28:23,027
And, and between the two of us you
know, we could, uh, come together

816
00:28:23,237 --> 00:28:24,497
from time to time and have sex.

817
00:28:25,577 --> 00:28:30,377
I have a high sex drive and I can probably
look past the stress to have more sex,

818
00:28:30,617 --> 00:28:33,977
but I don't want to push you for that
because yeah, I know what you're feeling

819
00:28:33,977 --> 00:28:34,967
and I know what you're going through.

820
00:28:34,967 --> 00:28:38,687
Yeah, and so that's really kind of
the, the pull that I give to the

821
00:28:38,687 --> 00:28:43,397
community out there is, Hey man,
if you've got your spouse, your

822
00:28:43,607 --> 00:28:44,747
other half, your play partners.

823
00:28:46,052 --> 00:28:48,107
Or even just your friends mm-hmm.

824
00:28:48,242 --> 00:28:51,332
Or your friends with benefits,
whatever label you give to 'em,

825
00:28:51,692 --> 00:28:55,622
understand and be understanding that
everybody is going through a very,

826
00:28:55,622 --> 00:28:58,382
very exhausting and stressful time.

827
00:28:58,442 --> 00:28:58,592
Yes.

828
00:28:59,012 --> 00:29:03,452
And I'm sure it can be like that
throughout the rest of the year too, but

829
00:29:03,502 --> 00:29:05,332
the holidays really bring it on extra.

830
00:29:05,362 --> 00:29:05,482
Mm-hmm.

831
00:29:05,852 --> 00:29:08,957
And I really feel that with all of that.

832
00:29:09,827 --> 00:29:13,037
It's important to just kind
of hit that reset button.

833
00:29:13,247 --> 00:29:15,737
Spend time with the people
that mean a lot to you.

834
00:29:16,397 --> 00:29:21,317
Give them hugs, give them kisses,
give 'em whatever they need and

835
00:29:21,497 --> 00:29:24,347
just let 'em know it's gonna be
okay and we're gonna get through it.

836
00:29:24,497 --> 00:29:27,887
And then when things are
better, you bang it out.

837
00:29:28,067 --> 00:29:28,517
There you go.

838
00:29:28,847 --> 00:29:29,837
And you have your fun.

839
00:29:30,137 --> 00:29:31,127
There you go.

840
00:29:31,127 --> 00:29:32,232
There you go.

841
00:29:32,232 --> 00:29:32,512
I like that.

842
00:29:32,837 --> 00:29:33,797
I like that too.

843
00:29:34,547 --> 00:29:34,912
Uh, so.

844
00:29:35,882 --> 00:29:40,802
Yeah, I feel like this
was a really great topic.

845
00:29:40,802 --> 00:29:42,962
I did wanted to ke I
wanted to keep it light.

846
00:29:43,502 --> 00:29:45,392
I wanted to keep it fun and airy.

847
00:29:45,392 --> 00:29:48,002
You told that story, that's what just
absolute Well, because you were already

848
00:29:48,002 --> 00:29:51,872
crying so I figured I'd go with it, you
know, was but then you made me laugh.

849
00:29:52,212 --> 00:29:53,502
Yeah, but I always make you laugh.

850
00:29:53,592 --> 00:29:54,312
That's true.

851
00:29:54,652 --> 00:29:56,362
There's not, that's not anything new.

852
00:29:57,412 --> 00:29:58,222
That's what we do.

853
00:29:58,772 --> 00:30:03,332
I mean, guys, thank you very much
for, for listening to us vent our.

854
00:30:04,202 --> 00:30:05,342
Our feelings.

855
00:30:05,687 --> 00:30:06,422
You're not alone.

856
00:30:06,842 --> 00:30:08,102
No, definitely not alone.

857
00:30:08,107 --> 00:30:10,247
Even though we are going
through our own stress.

858
00:30:10,247 --> 00:30:12,557
If you need someone to
talk to, we are here.

859
00:30:12,707 --> 00:30:13,157
Yes.

860
00:30:13,157 --> 00:30:16,337
And you know, we have said that
plenty of times the people that

861
00:30:16,337 --> 00:30:18,167
are in our community know this.

862
00:30:18,467 --> 00:30:20,777
We are available to our listeners.

863
00:30:20,777 --> 00:30:20,867
Yes.

864
00:30:21,137 --> 00:30:22,182
We wanna you wanna chat?

865
00:30:22,892 --> 00:30:25,352
As long as you don't make
it spicy with me, I'm good.

866
00:30:26,042 --> 00:30:26,702
Not in the mood.

867
00:30:26,702 --> 00:30:26,972
Yeah.

868
00:30:27,122 --> 00:30:30,212
You, you've got us at
on different messengers.

869
00:30:30,362 --> 00:30:30,452
Yes.

870
00:30:30,452 --> 00:30:32,522
You can email us, you
can leave us a voicemail.

871
00:30:32,552 --> 00:30:32,642
Yeah.

872
00:30:32,672 --> 00:30:36,102
You can even leave a 100%
anonymous confessional.

873
00:30:36,252 --> 00:30:36,522
Yes.

874
00:30:36,612 --> 00:30:38,562
On our Beyond Monogamy confessional.

875
00:30:38,562 --> 00:30:42,982
So yeah, there's plenty of ways to get
get word to us to get to talk to us.

876
00:30:43,092 --> 00:30:43,932
And we.

877
00:30:44,532 --> 00:30:47,322
Or at the behest of our listeners,
because you guys are a part of our circle.

878
00:30:47,322 --> 00:30:47,472
Yes.

879
00:30:47,472 --> 00:30:50,502
You're part of our, our
friendships and our connections.

880
00:30:50,622 --> 00:30:50,712
Mm-hmm.

881
00:30:51,042 --> 00:30:54,582
So I appreciate it, everybody
coming in and hanging with

882
00:30:54,582 --> 00:30:55,692
us for this week's quickie.

883
00:30:55,872 --> 00:30:59,352
If you loved it, make sure to like,
subscribe, share, and leave us a

884
00:30:59,352 --> 00:31:03,822
review because it seriously helps us
grow and it keeps the conversation

885
00:31:03,822 --> 00:31:04,812
going and that's important.

886
00:31:04,822 --> 00:31:05,332
Yes.

887
00:31:05,332 --> 00:31:08,792
And remember, you can find
everything beyond monogamy at

888
00:31:08,792 --> 00:31:15,022
www.beyond-monogamy.com, including
our Beyond Monogamy Confessional,

889
00:31:15,022 --> 00:31:16,132
like Boo Bear just said.

890
00:31:16,162 --> 00:31:19,432
Yes, blog posts, merch,
and all the juicy extras.

891
00:31:19,462 --> 00:31:23,722
Ooh, and I put some Christmas merch
in there, so know Christmas merch.

892
00:31:23,782 --> 00:31:28,187
Oh, also guys, I have like little shop
links there, so if you wanna buy a gift.

893
00:31:29,307 --> 00:31:31,977
And you're not feeling
financially strapped.

894
00:31:32,667 --> 00:31:35,457
There's lots of little fun
little gifts that you can give.

895
00:31:35,967 --> 00:31:36,147
Oh yeah.

896
00:31:36,147 --> 00:31:39,327
Little links to, to some fun toys.

897
00:31:39,327 --> 00:31:41,187
Oh man, I don think I know
what you're talking about.

898
00:31:41,187 --> 00:31:42,027
That should be interesting.

899
00:31:42,442 --> 00:31:43,942
Uh, and, and you know, with that.

900
00:31:44,712 --> 00:31:48,072
Like I was talking about earlier, don't
forget to check out our events tab on our

901
00:31:48,072 --> 00:31:53,142
website for details on upcoming Beyond
Monogamy events like This Weekend's

902
00:31:53,202 --> 00:31:58,302
upcoming Texas Legends Hotel Takeover
from December 5th to the seventh.

903
00:31:58,302 --> 00:32:02,562
That's Friday checking out on Sunday
and our Beyond Monogamy meet and greet.

904
00:32:03,402 --> 00:32:05,742
At Club Eden San Antonio.

905
00:32:06,042 --> 00:32:06,222
Yes.

906
00:32:06,222 --> 00:32:10,962
On December 13th, guys, there's still
time to get tickets to the takeover.

907
00:32:11,052 --> 00:32:11,772
Yes, there is.

908
00:32:11,772 --> 00:32:12,702
There's still plenty of room.

909
00:32:12,702 --> 00:32:17,602
You can do day passes, you can get
a room, you can chill with us and

910
00:32:17,602 --> 00:32:20,182
that's the big part is, you know,
for our listeners who aren't in our

911
00:32:20,182 --> 00:32:22,102
community, yes, that's your chance.

912
00:32:22,102 --> 00:32:22,972
You want to hang out with us?

913
00:32:22,972 --> 00:32:24,067
We're gonna be there all weekend.

914
00:32:24,067 --> 00:32:24,262
All weekend.

915
00:32:24,802 --> 00:32:27,562
Hey, you wanna put the pickup
lines on this beautiful woman here,

916
00:32:27,562 --> 00:32:30,382
by all means, but lemme tell you
something, if you didn't hear the

917
00:32:30,382 --> 00:32:31,707
entire show, she's a little stressed.

918
00:32:32,302 --> 00:32:34,942
So I'm just saying it might
be a little difficult.

919
00:32:35,422 --> 00:32:36,022
Good luck.

920
00:32:36,112 --> 00:32:36,562
That's right.

921
00:32:36,742 --> 00:32:39,982
But if you get, if you got a few ones in
your thong maybe she'll come following.

922
00:32:40,012 --> 00:32:43,192
You know, I might, the dogs do that
whenever I put bacon in my pockets.

923
00:32:43,672 --> 00:32:46,682
And of course, you know, club Eden,
that's our favorite hangout club.

924
00:32:46,682 --> 00:32:48,122
Eden is the spot for us.

925
00:32:48,122 --> 00:32:49,712
That is our, our favorite local club.

926
00:32:49,742 --> 00:32:53,762
And, uh, we will be having that meet
and greet out there on December 13th.

927
00:32:53,762 --> 00:32:57,422
We have friends who are
going to be literally.

928
00:32:57,752 --> 00:33:00,032
Driving into town to
be here for this event.

929
00:33:00,122 --> 00:33:00,512
Yes.

930
00:33:00,572 --> 00:33:02,582
Uh, we have content creators.

931
00:33:02,582 --> 00:33:03,932
You name it, we are gonna be there.

932
00:33:03,932 --> 00:33:09,572
We're gonna have a couch out there
and we are welcoming everybody if

933
00:33:09,572 --> 00:33:10,532
you want to come hang out with us.

934
00:33:10,532 --> 00:33:13,532
Yes, that is the time to do it
along with this coming weekends.

935
00:33:13,907 --> 00:33:15,107
Hotel takeover.

936
00:33:15,347 --> 00:33:17,657
The event tab, he
created a good event tab.

937
00:33:17,657 --> 00:33:18,227
Guys, it's there.

938
00:33:18,227 --> 00:33:19,517
All the inf information is there.

939
00:33:19,517 --> 00:33:22,447
If you click on it, you know, as
soon as you go to the, the website

940
00:33:22,627 --> 00:33:25,357
and you go to the events tab, you're
gonna see the different ones there.

941
00:33:25,357 --> 00:33:29,317
And then when you want to find the
information, you press on it and

942
00:33:29,317 --> 00:33:30,427
it brings up all the information.

943
00:33:30,607 --> 00:33:31,597
Isn't that nice?

944
00:33:31,597 --> 00:33:32,197
That's great.

945
00:33:32,227 --> 00:33:32,827
That's nice.

946
00:33:32,857 --> 00:33:34,237
You like to hear yourself talk.

947
00:33:34,267 --> 00:33:35,737
Oh, there she goes again.

948
00:33:36,187 --> 00:33:37,087
Whatever.

949
00:33:37,237 --> 00:33:41,827
And with that, we're also streaming
every Thursday on full swap radio.com

950
00:33:41,827 --> 00:33:44,557
at 2:00 PM and 7:00 PM Central time.

951
00:33:44,557 --> 00:33:48,127
So tune in and show us some
love over there as well.

952
00:33:48,187 --> 00:33:48,817
Yes.

953
00:33:48,817 --> 00:33:52,757
And if you wanna keep helping us grow
this community, well, I tell you what

954
00:33:54,317 --> 00:34:00,737
our community is growing on SDC, and I
want to give SDC a shout out because,

955
00:34:01,067 --> 00:34:06,517
SDC has been very awesome with with
being very supportive of our podcast.

956
00:34:06,547 --> 00:34:06,637
Mm-hmm.

957
00:34:06,907 --> 00:34:09,787
And we're gonna be doing some great
things in the future with sdc.

958
00:34:09,817 --> 00:34:09,907
Mm-hmm.

959
00:34:10,147 --> 00:34:11,467
So we're pretty excited about that.

960
00:34:11,467 --> 00:34:11,557
Yes.

961
00:34:11,557 --> 00:34:13,417
So, if you are not on SDC.

962
00:34:14,632 --> 00:34:15,592
Let me tell you something.

963
00:34:15,592 --> 00:34:16,762
You gotta go to our show notes.

964
00:34:16,762 --> 00:34:22,192
Go to our website, click on that button
that says the letters S, D, and C. Yes.

965
00:34:22,252 --> 00:34:25,042
We also have it on our tiktoks
and our social media, the

966
00:34:25,042 --> 00:34:26,302
little links for Link Tree.

967
00:34:26,302 --> 00:34:27,742
We'll take you to SDC.

968
00:34:27,772 --> 00:34:28,132
That's right.

969
00:34:28,132 --> 00:34:30,802
Straight to highly recommend it
because, you know, we are actually

970
00:34:30,802 --> 00:34:35,077
going to be doing some quote unquote
masterclasses or some live mm-hmm.

971
00:34:35,292 --> 00:34:37,482
Opportunities and having.

972
00:34:37,872 --> 00:34:42,462
Opportunities for the community to reach
out to us even if they're not in person.

973
00:34:42,462 --> 00:34:42,552
Yes.

974
00:34:42,582 --> 00:34:43,512
Which I think is really cool.

975
00:34:43,872 --> 00:34:45,912
So lots of opportunities there.

976
00:34:45,912 --> 00:34:46,872
You should scope it out.

977
00:34:46,872 --> 00:34:48,432
You can find it all on our website.

978
00:34:48,432 --> 00:34:50,922
You can find it all in our
show notes with this show.

979
00:34:51,282 --> 00:34:54,702
Uh, with that, I would
like to say happy holidays.

980
00:34:54,702 --> 00:34:57,972
Thanks for listening, and we
will see you guys next week.

981
00:34:58,002 --> 00:34:58,392
Bye.