Catfishing in the Lifestyle: Lies, Wigs, and Fishy Business

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What the Heck is “Catfishing,” Anyway?

No, we’re not talking about muddy rivers in Louisiana or deep-sea noodling. “Catfishing” is the online art of pretending to be someone else—whether it’s through fake photos, stolen identities, or just highly “filtered” versions of reality.

The term got its mainstream moment in 2010 thanks to the documentary Catfish (and later the MTV show). But the scam itself? Oh, it’s been around as long as chatrooms, dial-up internet, and AIM screen names ending in 34C.

Fun fact: even in the early AOL days of the ‘90s, catfishing was rampant. A 1998 Pew Research study found that 28% of internet users admitted to misrepresenting themselves online. Fast forward to today, and it’s a billion-dollar scam industry. In 2022 alone, the FTC reported that romance scams cost Americans over $1.3 billion. Yikes.

Why Catfish Swim Into the Lifestyle 🐟

If vanilla dating is like fishing in a pond, lifestyle dating is like tossing a net into the ocean—lots of energy, lots of variety, and sometimes a few sketchy catches. So why do people catfish in the lifestyle?

• Ego Boosts: Pretending to be younger, hotter, or more “swingy” than reality.

• Curiosity: Vanilla couples posing as swingers just to see what happens.

• Predators: Scammers fishing for nudes, money, or quick hookups.

• Insecurity: Singles pretending to be couples, or heavily filtering themselves to avoid rejection.

Red Flags: How to Spot a Catfish 🚩

You don’t need to be Sherlock Holmes to sniff out a catfish. Look for these warning signs:

• No face pics (or all model-like glamour shots).

• Only filtered Snapchat-style selfies with dog ears.

• Always too busy to video chat or meet in person.

• Stories that don’t add up (“We’re brand new!” but they’ve “been in the lifestyle for 10 years”).

• Overeager for nudes, explicit chat, or rushing into a meet.

• Ghosting the moment you ask for proof.

And yes—people are still out here in 2025 stealing random profile pics and pretending to be someone else.

The Fallout 💔

Catfishing isn’t just annoying—it can be unsafe.

• Emotional Letdowns: Wasted time, shattered trust, and crushed confidence.

• Safety Concerns: For women especially, fake identities = scary situations.

• Community Damage: Every lie chips away at trust in lifestyle spaces.

• Sexual Health Risks: If someone is willing to lie about their face, what else are they willing to lie about?

Protect Yourself Like a Pro 🛡️

Here’s how Adam & Pris keep it real and stay safe in the lifestyle:

1. Video Verify – FaceTime, Zoom, Messenger—whatever it takes, see them live.

2. Meet in Public/Trusted Spaces – Clubs, meet & greets, or lifestyle events are safer than private first meets.

3. Cross-Reference Profiles – Most lifestyle folks are on multiple sites (SDC, Kasidie, SLS). Compare them.

4. Community Check – Ask around. Lifestyle communities talk. If someone’s shady, you’ll hear about it.

5. Trust Your Gut – That “something feels off” feeling? Don’t ignore it.

A Little Humor Goes a Long Way

We’ve seen it all: men pretending to be couples, “short kings” claiming to be 6’2”, and even scammers asking Adam to pay for their birthday nails ($45, in case you’re wondering). Spoiler: he didn’t.

And then there’s the classic “Oops, wrong person!” text that was really a screenshot of your whole conversation. Red flag? Yep. 🚩

The truth is, catfish might be creative—but most of them aren’t that clever.

The Lifestyle Is Built on Trust

At the end of the day, ethical non-monogamy only works when honesty, consent, and trust are front and center. Catfishing chips away at that foundation. If you’re lying to get in the door, you’re not just wasting someone’s time—you’re hurting the community.

So keep your doors locked, your filters minimal, and your catfish detection radar turned on.

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You are part of our community. And our community = family. Thanks for helping us keep it sexy, safe, and catfish-free. 💜